TOP UKIP RUNNERS AND RIDERS:
1. Dodgy Businessman Married To Spy
2. Fantasist Ex-Matador
3. Man Who Punched Other Man
4. Skinhead Rupert Bear
5. Kilroy
6. Ex-Police Commissioner Who Literally Worships Satan
7. Divorcee Owner Of Coastal Gollywog Boutique
8. Nigel Farage Again

— Hugo Rifkind (@hugorifkind) January 21, 2018