Bell™
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Posts posted by Bell™
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7 minutes ago, Stormzy said:
Immediate showers after hair cuts are required. I've lost many a good t shirt to the bin when I've been unable to get home immediately.
so you shower in the barber's and don't have a washing machine?
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not even the longest version they did
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2 hours ago, steelmen said:
We had one lassie who thanks to the civil service’s great maternity/sick leave policy managed to have a kid, take 6 months maternity leave followed by 5 months sick leave for ‘stress’ came back to work for 2 weeks before going off on 6 months maternity leave again. Of course those 2 weeks she basically sat with her feet up catching up with everyone.
lassie in my work many moons ago did near enough the same thing, with the added bonus of prior to carrying out the plan actually telling folk she was going to get pregnant, rip the c**t out of the no-questions-asked maternity sick-leave policy, take her maternity, then use up the annual leave she'd accrued over that period and then go on the sick again. She was back for a few weeks on reduced hours after her sick leave, then announced she was pregnant again and the cycle continued until she was caught for tax credits fraud and fired.
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I muted the commentary a while ago and put on the Amazon music black metal channel.
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1. Immigrant Song
2. Battle of Evermore
3. Stairway to Heaven
4. No Quarter
5. Whole Lotta Love
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Mental night last night. I had one dream where I was hunting a mouse in my house, had it cornered in the bathroom but lacked anything to trap it in, and knew if I left to fetch a bucket I'd lose it again. I had another dream where I was attempting to foil a plot to kill people and turn them into small vinyl statues (48mm scale ones, not your pop-whatever ones with the massive heads) and tipped the bad guy's computer over in an effort to damage the hard drive. The final dream revolved around a traffic jam in my street (where cars always park solidly up one side, making it effectively single-carriageway) and me trying to coordinate clearing it, but just having a huge shouting match with a woman driving a massive American Dodge pickup who was holding everything up and not moving and kept getting out the truck to argue instead of just driving where I directed her.0
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6 hours ago, Fullerene said:
Love the idea of "limited war".
How does that work?
it's a new real-time strategy game from Creative Assembly
Moronic Cnuts: Limited War
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he should just have phoned the cops, told them the guy at the door was actually a really light-skinned African American and left it up to them.
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12th March I saw Mondo Generator at Nice N Sleazy, although I was primarily there to see Alunah, who were supporting. They might also be the next gig I'm at, as they're slated to play Audio in February. Hopefully covid has fucked off by then, as it'll be incredibly difficult to socially distance in a place as small as Audio.
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15 minutes ago, The Moonster said:
We have this kinda mad guy in work who often rambles and always tells jokes/tales to people, I'm sure most work places have that guy. Anyway, earlier on he started a discussion about Faberge eggs, stating they were worth £53 million each and all this other shit. I came back into the office and one of my colleagues was saying this guy had been telling her a god awful joke, I said "aye, he was talking some amount of pish about Faberge eggs to me earlier as well" and another lassie said "who the f**k is Father Jay Eggs?"
some Clyde fan's dotting alias, I expect
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1 hour ago, ICTChris said:
In Freakonomics there’s a funny story about a guy in America who named his kids Winner and Loser.
1 hour ago, Jacksgranda said:Some people get drunk every day.
Winner does anyway
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I really don't want to be related to any of these roasters; can I petition a court for emancipation from The Family?
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I decided to have a week off the drink a few weeks back. after six days i decided to round up to a week and got utterly MWI.
Proved I can stop drinking whenever I want to; learned I don't want to.
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5 minutes ago, craigkillie said:
The SQA didn't or shouldn't be "blanket" doing anything. The teachers were asked to rank their students in order of performance, even with a grade band., so if the SQA needed to drop down some students from A to B, then the students being dropped down would be the lowest ranked A students. Therefore what you describe as the "genuine straight-A" students should be completely unaffected.Look at the table below, for example. It shouldn't matter which of the following the school submits - if the SQA decides that the school should get 3 As, 3Bs, 2Cs and 2Ds, then the eventual way they would be distributed should be exactly the same based on the ranking. That's the whole point in asking them to rank students in the first place.
Ranking Optimistic School Grade Realistic School Grade Pessmistic School Grade 1 A A A 2 A A B 3 A A B 4 A B B 5 A B C 6 A B C 7 B C C 8 B C D 9 C D D 10 C D D If the SQA left the top-ranked students with the predicted grades and dropped everyone else based on their teachers' arbitrary ranking, then the lowest-ranked students would have had an even larger drop in grades than they did, meaning a larger failure percentage. We'd then have an even greater disparity in the grades of the lowest achievers to the top.
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8 minutes ago, craigkillie said:
I think this post betrays a lack of understanding of the process that was actually followed. Even if you think that teachers decided to artificially inflate their grades, there is no reason that this would be "screwing over their overperforming pupils". Teachers were specifically asked to rank their students within a grade band too, so even if they had predicted a couple of extra As for borderline students, this shouldn't have mattered because a fair ranking system would have pushed down the grades of those students, not the top ones.
since the genuine straight-A students can't have their grades inflated - 100% is already as has as can be attained - by inflating all the other students estimates, the teachers have screwed over the straight-A students by causing the SQA to blanket lower everyone's grades. The lower end must have been inflated by more than 15% to achieve an average of 15%, and the top percentile not inflated at all, meaning the lowest percentile still benefit from the over-estimation, while the top percentile suffer, once the grades are lowered to a realistic level.
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12 minutes ago, NotThePars said:
Aren't they the folk that did Skyrim?
"I used to be an adventurer like you, until I got covid."
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I've Always Kept a Unicorn, the biography of Sandy Denny by Mick Houghton
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I saw some personal trainer type with a client down the park one afternoon last week. he'd taken a load of kettlebells and was making her lift them while standing a few yards back. if she can do that outdoors, and weights can be purchased from online retailers, then I don't see why gyms are necessary.
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2 minutes ago, banditjag said:
Why
why does 'autos' mean 'self'? you'd been to ask the ancient Greeks, it was them who invented the word.
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1 minute ago, banditjag said:
Never heard if self autonomy?
Silly post, Trott back to your own thread
autonomy already means 'self-rule'. the 'auto' bit at the start is literally 'self'.
and learn to multi-quote
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the Scottish Government introduced a scheme to help out newly self-employed people who weren't covered by the UK-wide scheme, whereas down south there are still 3Million+ folk left with no income and no work. Therefore, Scotland not only could have handled a furlough scheme without the UK, but has done.
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dreamt last night that American polis suspected some wee ned of plotting armed robbery on a chemists (or drug store, as they called it), so they got me in undercover to pretend to be the shopkeeper, telling me it would be a hostage situation. they gave me an antique Mexican shotgun, but when i asked if i was to shoot the ned, they told me not to touch it, just leave it lying against the counter. The ned came in and eyed up the shotgun, but didn't touch it either. When it became clear that it was a standoff, as i wasn't going to give him the money, we both left the went to get some scran from a supermarket, and the wee ned skipped a wheelchair-bound guy in the queue. I ended up not getting anything, but when we got back to the drug store to resume the hostage situation, the US cops had hastily erected a food-court type space with stalls selling all sorts of things. Still hungry after failing to get anything at the supermarket, i looked at the boards but it was all vegan stuff and I didn't like the sound of anything, except the falafel. I was about to order a falafel when the press conference began. I took a seat and the wee ned refused to say anything, despite the journalists trying to lead him. It transpired everyone present but me and the wee ned were undercover cops. Then, somehow, he managed to get an uzi and started spraying folk with bullets, including the guy next to me an a pregnant lassie. The ned subdued and arrested, the cops revealed that it was loaded with blanks and the victims all had blood packs on them. I figured this was the last they'd need of me, but it turned out there was a problem and they hadn't managed to record any of it, so they'd need to get a confession. Next thing, they've got the pregnant lassie back in, but it turns out she was wearing a pregnancy suit thing. she's now wearing a bikini (wid, btw) and claiming to the pregnant lassie's twin sister. They try and get me to force the ned to apologise to the 'sister', thus getting him to admit he shot a bunch of people, but he remained silent. The sister started talking in a bad weegie accent to try and draw him out, but it didn't work. Then one of the cops ran in, blurted something out about the hidden microphones and blew the operation, but they blamed it on me and deported both of us back to Scotland. I met the ned again, who was travelling on to south Wales to see the valleys. We arranged to meet up for a pint when he got back, as he wasn't a bad guy really.
Apart from apparently being willing to machine-gun pregnant women, i suppose.
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33 minutes ago, DeeTillEhDeh said:
Every time I go shopping there is at least one person, usually a woman over 70, who wears a face mask but does not put it over their nose.
Might as well not bother wearing it.luckily, these people are most likely mouthbreathers, so an incorrectly worn mask is probably still going to do its job
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On 07/07/2020 at 23:27, Gaz said:
Funny enough I was reading a bit about the pals' batallions, and in particular McRae's Battalion, earlier.
Now, I'm no military strategist, but who the f**k thought it was a great idea to have entire villages serve in the same fucking battalion, meaning that when the battalion was inevitably wiped out by whatever shite tactics they were using that day entire villages were losing almost their entire stock of working-age men?
It took me about 15 seconds of reading this to realise it was a shite idea.
I think a main reason for Pals Battalions was, as has been previously mentioned, the instant camaraderie that would be created near-instantly, rather than a unit having to be together for months. The British Army's doctrine at the time was unchanged from Napoleonic tactics, whereby they'd fire rife volleys while advancing and then have a bayonet charge. The French doctrine was exactly the same. The winners of a bayonet charge are likely to be the side with the best morale or esprit de corps, and the best discipline. Most bayonet charges result in one side surrendering or running away, so there are usually less fatalities, and the battle continues.
The European forces all sent military observers to watch the American civil war (where the bayonet charge wasn't really used, and instead they just stood 50-100 yards from each other and fired until one side was dead) but only the Prussians actually studied the goings on with any detail and learned from it - the rest just thought it was a mess and dismissed it entirely. Prussia experimented with what they learned in the Franco Prussian war of 1870-71, and then developed the tactics they used when a unified Germany swept through the low countries in 1914. The French and British armies still thought it was 1814 and expected to be able to do the volley-advance-volley-charge routine, which doesn't work against entrenched men with machine guns. it was 1916, i think, before the British Army officially changed the doctrine and accepted that it wasn't going to work.
The Lee Enfield rifle being issued in 1914 had a 10-round magazine, but also a cut-off to make it function as a single-shot rifle, so they could have the second rank advance while the first was reloading. That the Army requested a feature which deliberately made one of the most advanced military rifles of the time function the same way as a gun from forty years earlier is another example of the leadership at the time being completely out of touch with reality.
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The Partick Thistle thread
in Scottish Championship General Chatter
Posted
since Low is out, i guess i can finally lift my boycott and return to subjecting myself to Thistle's on-field antics at Firhill.
Of course, there's a week and a bit before the next home game, which is plenty of time for it all to come crashing down again. I expect the p***ks left the heating on in the boardroom when they left and the club will be bankrupt by the 17th.