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I picked up The Observer today rather than my usual rag on a Sunday. Whilst it costs more than the average paper (£2.90), I've spent the best part of three hours leisurely flicking through it and reading the articles.

Might need to make this a permanent thing.

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Put the Jungle Book soundtrack on in the kitchen for my daughter whilst I make her dinner.

I've just realised that she fucked off back through to the sitting room a good ten minutes ago and that I'm still dancing round the kitchen singing The Bare Necessities.

I regret nothing.

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We have four cats and one of our near neighbours has a real problem with it - I've heard him shouting at them and very early one Sunday morning I saw him chuck a stone at one which had me shouting I'd be chucking stones at him (not my finest moment but hey-ho and all that)

Anyhoo - he's just painted the tops of all his fences with anti-burglar paint and our cats are getting covered in it - auld c'nt!!

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We have four cats and one of our near neighbours has a real problem with it - I've heard him shouting at them and very early one Sunday morning I saw him chuck a stone at one which had me shouting I'd be chucking stones at him (not my finest moment but hey-ho and all that)

Anyhoo - he's just painted the tops of all his fences with anti-burglar paint and our cats are getting covered in it - auld c'nt!!

^^^ crazy cat lady

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We have four cats and one of our near neighbours has a real problem with it - I've heard him shouting at them and very early one Sunday morning I saw him chuck a stone at one which had me shouting I'd be chucking stones at him (not my finest moment but hey-ho and all that)

Anyhoo - he's just painted the tops of all his fences with anti-burglar paint and our cats are getting covered in it - auld c'nt!!

My neighbour's cat has taken to killing, eating, and burying small birds in my garden.

Tell him that after the 3rd pint of water thrown over them, they tend to stop coming back.

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The neighbours cats used to really mess up my garden, they treated it like a public toilet and I was forever cleaning up their mess off the lawn. I think your neighbour is well within his rights to try to keep them out of his garden

Yip - but that won't keep them out his garden, they'll just keep climbing his fence unaware that it's causing them harm when cleaning it off and causing a mess when they trail it through the house.

I'm not unsympathetic - ours aren't the only cats around and last Summer our next door neighbour bought an automatic water sprayer to keep cats off his lawn - when Mrs Ned found out about it she offered them half the money and when they refused she gave them a bottle of wine.

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My neighbour's cat has taken to killing, eating, and burying small birds in my garden.

Tell him that after the 3rd pint of water thrown over them, they tend to stop coming back.

I remember my mother throwing a bucket of water over a feral cat which was raking the bins, and it dropped dead there and then Edited by bob the tank
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