Herman Hessian Posted October 22, 2018 Posted October 22, 2018 OMFG - FOMOMG ! this is dreadful - a whole new metric which we can measure just how wretched and miserable our lives are ! read these tragic tales - if you can - and share your heartrending stories of failure, abject misery, crushed ambitions, aspirational disasters and general life-incompetence: Quote Root through that dusty box in your mum's loft and you're bound to come across that diary with the words "life goals" scrawled across the front. You know, the important to-do list which set out what you wanted to achieve by the time you hit the big age milestones. • Become a millionaire • Married with two kids by 28 • Own a successful business • Travel the world • Buy that four-bed house • Get a dog But the pressure of achieving our personal targets can cause stress and anxiety for some people. It's being called FOMOMG - the Fear Of Missing Out [on] My Goals. Model Leomie Anderson used the term in a recent column for the female-focused website LAPP. It's something that Emilie Thomas, 25, from Manchester, can relate to. She got married in July, owns a house with her husband and has a job in PR - but has still experienced FOMOMG. "A month after I got married I was off work with stress. I got to the point I deleted my Facebook, Instagram and Twitter," she said. "I felt so miserable about my own life, I was struggling to see what was in front of me." Emilie says she felt like she should be happy but wasn't because she hadn't "lived up to her own expectations" - such as her goal to go travelling. "At 25 I'm still driving the Yaris my mum bought for me and I'm doing the same role at work and I'm not progressing. I thought by this point I'd be earning more." Fiona McAra, 29, from Oxfordshire, says she experienced FOMOMG after breaking up with her partner of seven years in 2017. The goals she thought she would have achieved by now - like being married - haven't happened. "I lie there awake at night thinking I'm not on track - it worries and frustrates me. I suppose for me the worry is 'Where did it all go wrong?' and that exacerbates the situation. "I'm pretty happy but it's just the little things. In the fairytale you meet the right person and settle down and get a dog and it's not happened." Fiona says she feels an "overwhelming desire" to fix it and it does affect her confidence. "The worst thing for me is the internal pressure. When I feel I'm failing myself there's a frustration." https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-45894506 are any P&B'ers in a slough of despair because they're not yet married, are still driving a Yaris, do not have a dog or have (worse of all) had to delete their social media accounts ? are any other P&B'ers living in the Eritrea, Syria or Yemen, where every day it's a struggle to stay alive, where - frustratingly - your children die of malnutrition or disease, or your self-confidence takes a knock when family members are obliterated by helicopter gunships or suicide bombings - do you think your problems are any worse than those of Emilie or Fiona ? personally, I'm a bit fucking annoyed that I've had the same 44" TV for the last six years or so, only have an iPhone 6, and my macbook doesn't have an SSD - life's a complete bitch what are your tales of coming up disappointingly short, or losing relatives in harrowing circumstances ?
Boghead ranter Posted October 22, 2018 Posted October 22, 2018 27 minutes ago, Herman Hessian said: ^^^all that stuff^^^ The bit that hits home for me is the stuff about her job, and how she feels she's still where she was 5 years ago. 5 years ago I changed roles within my company, but before that had managed people for over 20 years. One thing my ex-manager colleagues are increasingly saying is that managing young (just out of school or Uni) new starts is an issue. They have grown up in an instant gratification world, where you can post a selfie or an 'inspirational' quote, and within minutes you have a deluge of likes and ego-boosting comments. They expect the same response in work, where, in effect, you have to exceed what's expected of you to earn that kind of response. Just doing your job on a day to day basis is the least expected of you, you're not going to get made to feel like the best thing that's ever happened to the company by your line manager for that. Yet some can get extremely upset if they're not taken to one side and told how well they're doing, or even more so, made a fuss of in front of everyone else in their team. Modern world problems, I guess. I'm glad I'm well out. ^^^yer da'^^^
drs Posted October 22, 2018 Posted October 22, 2018 Emilie Thomas, 25, sounds like a complete waste of space. I wanted to set foot on the moon, be an F1 driver, score the winning goal in the World Cup Final and find a chippy in Scotland that still sold deep fried pizza without the batter. As yet I've achieved none of them. Life fucking sucks but somehow I'll survive.
Herman Hessian Posted October 22, 2018 Author Posted October 22, 2018 13 minutes ago, drs said: Emilie Thomas, 25, sounds like a complete waste of space. she looks pretty well put together, though - very tidily proportioned i'm sure it'll cheer her up knowing that interweb sorts are drooling, too - perhaps some encouraging messages would be appropriate ?
Granny Danger Posted October 22, 2018 Posted October 22, 2018 I have finally accepted that I will never be a spaceman but with McLeish in charge I have not given up playing for Scotland. I am 63.
Archie McSquackle Posted October 22, 2018 Posted October 22, 2018 The problem doesn't seem to be the level of achievement (or otherwise) but the completely unrealistic level of the expectations. Fortunately my dad took me to watch Motherwell at an early age so my expectations are pretty low.
Priti priti priti Patel Posted October 22, 2018 Posted October 22, 2018 One's pissed off cos Mummy bought a Yaris and the other wan wants a dog. For f**k's sake.
Shandon Par Posted October 22, 2018 Posted October 22, 2018 They're quite a materialistic bunch that FML/FOMOMG lot. 29 minutes ago, Granny Danger said: I have finally accepted that I will never be a spaceman You could get your ashes sent into space?
banana Posted October 22, 2018 Posted October 22, 2018 The BBC promoting narcissism for middle-class women on their front page, surprising. Gotta sympathise to an extent though, these birds are miles out of touch with reality and are miles from what was 'promised' them. They'll be fine once they stop pissing around and pop out some weans.
NJ2 Posted October 22, 2018 Posted October 22, 2018 I’m not one for measuring my life against others, which is just as well, but I know folk who definitely struggle with this. If it’s not a “woe is me” attitude I don’t see anything wrong with wanting nice things etc. though.
DA Baracus Posted October 22, 2018 Posted October 22, 2018 2 hours ago, Boghead ranter said: The bit that hits home for me is the stuff about her job, and how she feels she's still where she was 5 years ago. 5 years ago I changed roles within my company, but before that had managed people for over 20 years. One thing my ex-manager colleagues are increasingly saying is that managing young (just out of school or Uni) new starts is an issue. They have grown up in an instant gratification world, where you can post a selfie or an 'inspirational' quote, and within minutes you have a deluge of likes and ego-boosting comments. They expect the same response in work, where, in effect, you have to exceed what's expected of you to earn that kind of response. Just doing your job on a day to day basis is the least expected of you, you're not going to get made to feel like the best thing that's ever happened to the company by your line manager for that. Yet some can get extremely upset if they're not taken to one side and told how well they're doing, or even more so, made a fuss of in front of everyone else in their team. Modern world problems, I guess. I'm glad I'm well out. ^^^yer da'^^^ There are 4 folk at my work who were straight out of school. None of them are like that.
senorsoupe Posted October 22, 2018 Posted October 22, 2018 This idea that you need to hit life goals or milestones by certain periods in your life is silly and causes unnecessary anxiety for some people. I am 33 and I have long given up on measuring myself on arbitrary life milestones. I don't own a house, don't have kids (yet) and am getting married next year (have been with the future Mrs. Soupe for 5 years). Meanwhile the future Mrs. Soupe comes from an Italian family where they take this kind of shit seriously. She often gets down seeing her younger cousins who own houses, have kids etc... I do not own a car bought by my parents though
Boghead ranter Posted October 22, 2018 Posted October 22, 2018 8 minutes ago, DA Baracus said: There are 4 folk at my work who were straight out of school. None of them are like that. I'm only going by anecdotal evidence from friends of mine in work who still manage people. And balance that against your anecdotal evidence. The reality is probably somewhere in the middle, there will be some youngsters today who can make the distinction between Social Media and real life, and can transition into working with o issues, and there will be some that think actual life and online life is exactly the same, and get a shock when it isn't.
Sergeant Wilson Posted October 22, 2018 Posted October 22, 2018 1 hour ago, Herman Hessian said: she looks pretty well put together, though - very tidily proportioned i'm sure it'll cheer her up knowing that interweb sorts are drooling, too - perhaps some encouraging messages would be appropriate ? She could be sitting on a fortune.
Jambomo Posted October 22, 2018 Posted October 22, 2018 I get that some goals are unachievable by sheer effort i.e becoming a millionaire or owning a particularly massive house (given the costs etc) however if your goal is to go travelling, then why not just go? Maybe the husband would go as well. Not progressing at work is one thing but then you move on to somewhere else, not sit at the same office/company for 5 years. You have to help yourself to some extent, if you really care about these things.
D.A.F.C Posted October 22, 2018 Posted October 22, 2018 She just needs her flaps opened and heating turned up full blast.
NJ2 Posted October 22, 2018 Posted October 22, 2018 This idea that you need to hit life goals or milestones by certain periods in your life is silly and causes unnecessary anxiety for some people. I am 33 and I have long given up on measuring myself on arbitrary life milestones. I don't own a house, don't have kids (yet) and am getting married next year (have been with the future Mrs. Soupe for 5 years). Meanwhile the future Mrs. Soupe comes from an Italian family where they take this kind of shit seriously. She often gets down seeing her younger cousins who own houses, have kids etc... I do not own a car bought by my parents thoughDon’t own a car but bought your own parents? Canada seems strange imo
DA Baracus Posted October 22, 2018 Posted October 22, 2018 I have failed in every single aspect of life
tamthebam Posted October 22, 2018 Posted October 22, 2018 a healthy sense of perspective is useful. For example this is the Earth as seen from Saturn's rings. It's hard to make out any Toyota Yarises/Yarisii.. On the occasions when I've been in the boss's office for some minor misdemeanour I feel like telling the cnut about this picture. This is probably why he doesn't like me.
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