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The Great Squirrel Debate


The Definitive Squirrel Poll  

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Let's get straight to the point:  which is the best squirrel; red or grey?

IMO the grey is clearly far superior, possessing a degree of badassery, charisma and bushiness unrivalled by their red hipster cousins.  Reds may understandably argue that the greys are genocidal maniacs, but greys will argue that the reds are just being xenophobic arseholes, the equivalent of the Welsh telling the English to bugger off under pain of death because they might have Covid.  YET, the reds are more than happy to sit back in their cosy pine tree dreys and watch the greys being massacred by us humans in racially aggravated fashion.  Basically, the reds are nothing but a bunch of morally bankrupt hypocritical narcissistic woe-is-me Tufties.

can_crispr_save_tufty_fluffytale_1050x70

 

Furthermore, who is the best squirrel?  Personally I nominate Super Squirrel, not just because the clue is in the name, but because he encouraged a generation of ‘super savers’ to be responsible with their money.  Granted that these supersavers would eventually blow all their savings on Panini stickers of Robbie Raeside and Oleksiy Mykhaylychenko (and eventually some cheap cider or vodka), but at least there was intention there.  Compare that to the self-absorbed Nutz the Squirrel who doesn’t give a f*** about anyone of a non-Killie persuasion.

DiP_afIW4AA_0NB.jpg

Edited by Hedgecutter
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The grey rodent is a typical coloniser trying to take control of place by fair means of foul. They strip the natural resources, well they eat the bark of native trees, evidently. Like their American two-leggers who killed Native Americans with blankets carrying smallpox, they try to eradicate their red neighbours with a pox. Damn the Grey, long live the Red.

And the best squirrel is without a doubt Secret Squirrel.

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I was quite surprised that squirrels are viewed as flying rats in many other countries whereas we love 'em.

As it is, I'm on the red squirrel side of things. Love an underdog story and Dundee is one of the last remaining places where they are still flourishing rather than batting down the hatches against the OF loving wankers that are grey squirrels.

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3 minutes ago, Funky Nosejob said:

I got locked into a staring match with a black squirrel in Stanley Park, Vancouver in August 2002. Neither of us were willing to back down and if it hadn’t been for a jogger breaking our line of sight, we’d both probably still be there today. 

I had similar with a Ground Squirrel who constantly hung around my patio in Namibia.  I presumed he was a begging little c*** rather than a zombie squirrel, but I could be wrong.

image.png.2e4fcc5fd10bd7ee725a71c28ff6d05f.png

image.png.cd14747961a89203d3af04c83873fc14.png

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1 hour ago, Hedgecutter said:

Let's get straight to the point:  which is the best squirrel; red or grey?

IMO the grey is clearly far superior, possessing a degree of badassery, charisma and bushiness unrivalled by their red hipster cousins.  Reds may understandably argue that the greys are genocidal maniacs, but greys will argue that the reds are just being xenophobic arseholes, the equivalent of the Welsh telling the English to bugger off under pain of death because they might have Covid.  YET, the reds are more than happy to sit back in their cosy pine tree dreys and watch the greys being massacred by us humans in racially aggravated fashion.  Basically, the reds are nothing but a bunch of morally bankrupt hypocritical narcissistic woe-is-me Tufties.

can_crispr_save_tufty_fluffytale_1050x70

 

Furthermore, who is the best squirrel?  Personally I nominate Super Squirrel, not just because the clue is in the name, but because he encouraged a generation of ‘super savers’ to be responsible with their money.  Granted that these supersavers would eventually blow all their savings on Panini stickers of Robbie Raeside and Oleksiy Mykhaylychenko (and eventually some cheap cider or vodka), but at least there was intention there.  Compare that to the self-absorbed Nutz the Squirrel who doesn’t give a f*** about anyone of a non-Killie persuasion.

DiP_afIW4AA_0NB.jpg

I feel old now, I had one of those accounts when I was little 🤣 I remember my mum taking my brother and I to the bank to open them. I don’t know why, we never had any money to put in them. 

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40 minutes ago, Funky Nosejob said:

I got locked into a staring match with a black squirrel in Stanley Park, Vancouver in August 2002. Neither of us were willing to back down and if it hadn’t been for a jogger breaking our line of sight, we’d both probably still be there today. 

We get them here too. They're called Abert's Squirrels.

The Prince of the Ponderosa Pines: Our Evergreen Tassel-Eared Squirrels –  Evergreen Audubon | Evergreen Nature Center

Some of them come with silver highlights. Cracking wee lads.

Abert's Squirrel - Bandelier National Monument (U.S. National Park Service)

Edited by Shotgun
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1 minute ago, D.A.F.C said:

Ooo what are those?

Never seen them before.

Was going to say red but like these bois

Abert's squirrels. Sometimes known as tassel-eared squirrels. Although from Wikipedia's description of their habitat, it sounds as though they don't get as far north as Canada. So @Funky Nosejob's encounter may have been with a different species, possibly the fox squirrel.

Abert's Squirrel - Wikipedia

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5 minutes ago, D.A.F.C said:

Ooo what are those?

Never seen them before.

Was going to say red

I think we can safely say that that they’re not red.

I would say that they’re very, very, very, very dark grey.

 

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2 minutes ago, Shotgun said:

Abert's squirrels. Sometimes known as tassel-eared squirrels. Although from Wikipedia's description of their habitat, it sounds as though they don't get as far north as Canada. So @Funky Nosejob's encounter may have been with a different species, possibly the fox squirrel.

Abert's Squirrel - Wikipedia

Quote

These squirrels are black forms of the invasive eastern gray squirrels – Sciurus carolinensis – the same species which have largely deposed the reds from the UK. The population in Stanley Park is said to have originated from breeding pairs given as a gift from the Mayor of New York in 1909 and released into the Park.

Those darn, invasive greys again!

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