remain anon

I am having a bit of up and down at the moment, but the lows seem to be filled with rage. I could quite easily put some c**t through a wall right now, just waiting for the trigger. I have nothing to be angry about though, Im hoping that writing it down will help. I need to take a step back and look at myself. My teeth are so tense when Im like this and I feel it across my chest, just ready to burst. But I have a happy healthy family, so I need to just chill the f**k oot. Sorry rambling.

Thank you all for your input. @DA Baracus. Your words on this thread mean so much more than you will ever realise. I do suffer regular bouts of depression and I feel myself sinking into one at the moment, probably why things are so amplified right now. I have no enthusiasm right now to do anything. I have so many things I need to do, but have absoloutly no motivation to do it. I have taken too much on in my life, my wife cant help because she is ill, long term. I don't want here to worry about finances either. I just feel totally worn down and have no energy. I never seem to get a clean break, there's always something stopping me getting to the plateau. Much love all.

Hello. I am a regular user of the site, however I have created this profile to remain annonymus because I need to vent without others who may read this knowing my identity. It's nothing overly bad I guess I just need to write it down. If you do guess who I am, please keep it to yourself. I'm not coping very well just now, not anything suicidal, just struggling with life. Christmas has cost me more than I intended due to an error in a credit agreement. My pets are costing me a fortune, one of the dogs might be pregnant and the other one is ill. My gas meter hasn't picked up it's signal in months so my credit hasn't went down, but when it does connect, I'm thinking about £2k? I have large credit card debts and heavily into my overdraft. I cant afford another 'surprise' but I have a feeling one is just round the corner. I am dreading a large vet bill or the gas being cut off. Can't afford to take the kids to the football for a mental escape, if I did, I know I would feel 10x worse for doing it. I just feel my money errors are going to blow up in my face and I am going to really upset those around me, when I cant pay for a vet or heat my home. I am the bread winner in my house and my family rely on me for stability. I'm just really fucking struggling to keep things going.