Hedgecutter
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Posts posted by Hedgecutter
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BBC Scotland's acceptance of sh1te self-appointed monikers from absolute no-marks such as 'Grado', 'Dazza' etc.
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1 hour ago, coprolite said:
I don't think i ever heard that and i was at Aberdeen Uni for four years.
What about the Hilhead halls of residence being modelled on a Swedish womens' prison?
(I don't think that one's limited to just Aberdeen uni though)
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A post on another thread about an urban 'myth' from uni had me thinking about the various urban legends doing the rounds out there. The well-entrenched one that pops straight to mind for me is Marischal College in Aberdeen being Hitler's favourite building in the UK, which he would have made a residence or HQ had he won WW2. I don't think any student can be in Aberdeen for over a week and not hear that one.
I overheard somebody in Banchory say that it has the widest pavement in the UK after somebody beside him said "tell me something I don't know". I feel both proud and guilty about that one as I fabricated that blatant lie when passing an infilled bus stop and added it to the Banchory Wikipedia page when bored one afternoon. Some mod took it down a long time back once they started taking referencing seriously, but I'm entertained that at least one person still thinks it's true.
Anyway, which urban myths/legends have you heard from your part of the land? Whether it's half the town or just a handful of people who genuinely think it's legit, let's get them shared...
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On 26/05/2024 at 10:39, Le Tout P'ti FC said:
Once you replace Whole of the Moon with Whole of Dunoon one time, you never go back.
Remembered one earlier tonight when I heard:
"f*** that little mouse, and Donald where's yer trousers?"
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9 minutes ago, The Minertaur said:
So natural and charismatic.
Just say: I'd already done my token bit for the British-specific parts, so didn't need to bother with the rest of the event... and anyway, it's nothing to do with the election as we decided weeks ago that we couldn't be arsed with it.
... and repeat it about five times over. That should sort it.
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Imagine writing a desperate last-minute back of a fag packet policy involving the reintroduction of a years national service just to appease the gammon, then pissing them (and everybody else) off by being too busy for an afternoon with the other world leaders for a landmark D-Day commemoration.
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Any time I've ever seen anything about Taylor Swift's new (Eras) tour, this has immediately popped into my head:
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14 hours ago, MazzyStar said:
That’s a real photo. They went to the wrong beach.
"D'you know where you're going?"
"Thought I was Sword, but if you say so..."
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1 hour ago, Nkomo-A-Gogo said:
Going to the movies
You disgust me.
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My grandfather was part of the first wave and was gunned down on the beach. Thankfully he had a big telecomms backpack for communicating where they should shell, which took much of the flak when he was on the ground.
He never talked about the day itself but always liked to say how he was responsible for the only fatality from Orkney during the training for Operation Neptune. He accidentally sent the wrong coords and a gunboat ended up shelling a field in which the unfortunate cow was standing.
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1 hour ago, Soapy FFC said:
I hate this as well. You press the button and after 30 seconds nothing has happened, the traffic clears so you cross before the lights have changed, and once you're 20 or 30 yards away from the crossing you hear the lights change and stop traffic with nobody at the crossing. These lights just piss off both the pedestrians and the drivers.
There's a new crossing not far from me that sometimes doesn't show the green man at all (ie it has the red man lit up, as opposed to some Larkhall brain donor being in the 'hood).
I.e. activate button with the red circle showing around it > red man shows for ages > lit up button becomes non-lit up button > seriously disgruntled people. In no way is it a case of missing the green man.
As much as a driver will look at you with a face that says "well f***ing go then!!!", you know their lights will go amber then green as soon as you walk out.
ETA: and wtf is this mullet thing about.
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2 hours ago, Dunfermline Don said:
I wonder if 1895 UK was as focused on the Napoleonic Wars as many in these islands still are with WW2.
Go back 80 years from D-Day and Abraham Lincoln was being re-elected during the American Civil War.
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Great way of honouring the non-English veterans here:
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On 03/06/2024 at 19:34, SomersetBairn said:
I managed to get a lift off Sir Ranulph Fiennes, as he was 'lost' in Yeovil.
Not really a good look for the boss of MI5, is it.
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37 minutes ago, Alert Mongoose said:
they should still acknowledge that, in 99.9% of car crashes, the car doesn't fly off the road on it's own.
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Pedestrian crossings which only have a button on one side of the road, particularly if you're at a busy road on the side without the button.
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2 hours ago, Salt n Vinegar said:
To be fair, the position of Bank of England notes and those of Scotland and Northern Ireland is a bit mad. Most people if pressed would struggle to be clear on accepting notes.
There's at least 2 definitions used - legal currency and legal tender. AIUI all these notes are legal currency, but none of them, including Bank of England notes are legal tender.
Could do with tidying up the laws/rules on these TBH.
... and very folk accept a £50* note these days; think I saw 3 places with signs up in shops just yesterday specifically stating their policy. I seemed to be the exception in a previous touristy job when it was quite handy to reduce the number of notes to handle/deposit. Always used to surprise the tourists that when they chanced their luck.
It's confusing for the tourists too, but there's always one foreign arsehole who wants to teach a Scottish company about a non-existent Scottish law. "You must accept zis!". Erm, naw.
Always feel sorry for tourists who get them handed out at the BDC though.
ETA: *nor (presumedly) home-printed £500 notes.
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Scots who make a big song and dance about Scottish notes not getting accepted in England but then look at Northern Irish notes in Scotland as if they're renminbi.
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24 minutes ago, strichener said:
That is madness when they would just be paying the fines to themselves.
A council introducing a fine system and then fining itself because it's cheaper to do so in the long run would come as absolutely no surprise whatsoever.
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It's as if they're boasting about Rutherglen to Central now being 'only' £115p/m.
Normal buy-on-the-day return £5.40.
£115 / 20 working days = £5.75 p/d.
Smashing.
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"child on board" signs.
Aye, we were happy enough risking the lives of others, but if there's a kid aboard then we'll make an exception.
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Corona with lime.
Successfully managed to say to the other half today "I could only get a multipack of limes, so you may as well get another multipack to avoid wasting them".
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My first time at T in the Park was as a 14 year old litter picker. We were told to place little flags next to used-johnnie's, needles etc, but we mostly put them in fallen sausages as it somehow seemed hilarious at that age.
I know it was '98 as we used our 'staff' yellow jacket privileges to push to the front row for The Prodigy, Beastie Boys & Pulp. I don't think we actually did much work tbh. Life lesson: never hire teenagers.
eta: vague memories of it being an absolute quagmire.
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Petty Things That Get On Your Nerves...
in The General Nonsense Forum
Posted
& 'Thommo'.
Absolute tinpot behaviour.