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greyman

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Posts posted by greyman

  1. Soooooo, had the consultant the other night. Asked how feasible it would be to get a general on account of not wanting a needle stuck into my nads. This comes down to if you're a fat b*****d or not. If your bmi is 35 you can get general anesthetic as you'll basically have a fat sack and they won't be able to find the tubes. Only time I've ever wished to be heavier.

    Admitted to her that I am, in fact, a big girls blouse and the thought of getting it done terrifies me. I am waiting on the date being confirmed. Another thing that upsets me is having to shave my own bollocks the night before. Can't be the easiest place to shave. Veet had crossed my mind until I spoke to a friend that told me he'd done it for his as he said it felt like his knacker's had been in a scotch bonnet paste over night.

    I surely must be going to heaven for this romantic gesture?

  2. got my date through for the consultant. be interesting to see if i go this time. my brother said that he was lucky enough to get knocked out when they did his as they fixed a hernia at the same time.

    couple of days off work i can deal with

    sympathy from the mrs i can deal with

    even being jumped on from the kids I can deal with

    what i can't deal with is the thought of someone tugging at my nuts while i'm awake.

  3. The stoners below me have constant arguments, the guy has the odd fist fight on the stairwell with the sub human scum from across the street, and they have a loud as f**k dog that as far as I'm aware has never been walked in its puff.

    Tempted to call the police about the smell of marijuana, not because I care about the weed but purely to get rid of them.

    go to the council if it's one of there's or a private let. theres a good landlord thing that all landlrds are meant to register for. they're responsible for shitty tenants

  4. My 5 year old has decided she will now freak me the f**k out in the middle of the night by having night terrors.

    Has anyone had the pleasure of these terrifying outbursts?

    I've never seen anything like it, she will be absolutely distraught with fear and barely recognises anyone that comes near her.

    Real terror you can't console as they are still sleeping really, she did it 2/3 times last night and I am cream crackered now.

    Quite upsetting at the time as you think you'd be able settle them down yet you only seem to make it worse by trying to help.....maybe that's just me though? :huh:

    been through that. not pleasant for all involved. sometimes episode lasted about half an hour. being the selfish p***k that i am, i did the bare minimum and left it to the wife (i'd be up at six for work)

  5. I'll probably have this done when I'm about 30, I'm 23 just now with 2 kids, unlikely to have any more.

    Unless a very good reason they'll not even consider you at the age of 30. They are happy to do it to folk over 40. Even then they will want to make sure you have kids and aren't planning on having more.

  6. You should make a few deposits in a jam jar and hide it in the freezer just in case. Don't let the wife know though, might not go down very well.

    fecking jam jars, didn't know we had Ron Jeremy on here. I'd need a thimble!!

  7. Surely not :o

    I actually got shown a Mickey Mouse diagram (not literal), of what was going to happen. Said a bit was going to be taken out and that it was irreversible. Said.he'd seen plenty of old boys trying to get it reversed as they were plugging young birds. Said I'd have to have a couple of shermans to get rid of any live ammo once the procedure had been done.

  8. Heart of Midlothian FC: doing more for the kids of Dnipropetrovsk than Hibernian FC have ever done.

    From what i've read of this, mystery benefactors have donated the money that will be split between Hearts and save the children. hearts are doing nothing apart from having "save The Children" on their shirts.

    Are hearts going to be giving a percentage of shirt sales to save the children? Don't recall reading that in the story.

    This shouldn't be about Hearts being some sort of pioneers of football, should be about the generous guys that have put the money up in the first place.

    "Owner Ann Budge has used Hearts-supporting business contacts to broker an agreement with a group of anonymous individuals – said to number less than five - who will fund the partnership. Save The Children will appear on Hearts’ home and away jerseys starting next season. Those funding the deal will make payments to the club, the charity and a smaller donation to Big Hearts Community Trust."

    Fair play though. Better than having a online betting company that no-one had heard of.

  9. Well, step one taken. Waiting on letter coming through to see the consultant. This caused great mirth in the wife and her friend. Her friends brother had it done and got to take something home in a jar. Why the f**k would you want a souvenir of your emasculation (ok, mibbe not emasculation but wtf)

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