Reynard
-
Posts
6,538 -
Joined
-
Last visited
-
Days Won
5
Content Type
Profiles
Forums
Events
Gallery
Store
Blogs
Posts posted by Reynard
-
-
Well the city centre is already full of these bigots, most seem pished already. We've got the police vans and helicopter out along with a few ambulances on standby (no doubt costs the city a pretty penny)
Amazing how they can afford to buy cans of lager, but between then they can't afford to buy a bar of soap.
It's good that you are simply rising above it all.
0 -
When they dug Airdrie up for astro to be laid a few urns had to be reburied. I think they're on the banking overlooking the Car park now. It's what they would have wanted.
Im not going to be cremated as I have a family mausoleum to go in when I snuff it. But if I did, in order for the kids to gain their considerable inheritance, I'd force them to eat my ashes after they had been mixed into a giant pot of yoghurt (they fucking hate yoghurt) while my lawyer witnesses the entire scenario.
It will be character building for them.
They can shit me out wherever they feel is appropriate afterwards.
0 -
what??When we left Love Street and moved to the new ground they got some utter w**k on a set of bagpipes and the full tartan regalia that Sir Walter Scott had invented as national dress and we took a tray that the groundsman had obviously prepared earlier which had a sod of turf in it with a white dot representing the centre spot.
Then a crowd of us followed the w****r of a piper and his shitty bagpipe screeching down the street to the new ground where the chairman or a lucky dip programme winner then proceeded to put the old centre spot onto the new centre spot.
It was fucking shit. I only went on it because the bloke I go to games with had to be in Paisley early to see some auntie of his that had fallen and broken her hip or something. So I went to the march thing and met him at the game.
The auntie died a few weeks later, probably from a morphine overdose, which is how most old folk snuff it in hospital.
Bed blocking old b*****ds.
0 -
Can we ban all those leftard political march things too.
And that bunch of fucking poofs that go on a prance type march to show everyone how gay they are and how normal it all is.
The only march I've ever been on was that one where we dug up the centre spot at Love Street and wandered down to the new ground with it. It was a bit shit and I'll never go on another march ever again.
0 -
An Accidental Jubilee by Alice Warrender.
0 -
The financial controls in this country I believe would be tighter if it was always wee teams going down the CVA route.
Just take a look at the debt avoiders and you see the roll of shame has been dominated by SPL teams.
They can't get too tough with these teams as they want to keep all the big teams at the top table.
Even when the club formally known as Rangers went to the wall, they still extended them an olive branch straight back into the SPL.
I still believe a year later if it wasn't for fan power, that Weegie mob would still be an SPL club. The chairmen only seemed to change their tune when threatened with a fan season ticket boycott.
What?
and
What?
You talk fucking shite on a regular basis. But this is a complete figment of your imagination.
0 -
I went to the Mauchline Holy Fair once.
Once.
0 -
My faither in law is on the Straiton Fun Day committee, this means that we all have to troop up there to participate and applaud the locals as they run up to the monument and back.
The highlight was definitely the sheaf tossing. I did it for the first time last summer and got through three or four rounds which wasnt bad. I didn't get my "I'm the biggest tosser in Straiton" T-Shirt which was a source of great sadness to me.
The best thing about the whole day is my kids watching "Grandpa" in his high viz vest, deer stalker, wellies, kilt, engineers glasses and his Sherlock Holmes style pipe grabbing the microphone to bellow at some poor unfortunate who parked in the wrong bit of the fucking field. The waltzing off with the legend "fun day committee" displayed on the back of his vest.
I wonder if Magic Malky will be there this year? He is appearing in court soon accused of some sort of sex offence.
0 -
Have you keelhauled any of the Hibs fuckers yet?
0 -
Coney is a class act. I'm old enough to remember him playing and captaining a very good New Zealand side back in the 80s. He was a good batsman, excellent slip fielder, useful bowler and an outstanding captain. He was also very sporting and famously allowed the retired Bob Taylor to keep wicket for England in a test match after Bruce French got injured. An intelligent man, he always has some useful insights to share as a commentator/summariser.
Yes, I can remember him playing back then too. NZ had a pretty decent side at the time, good openers, Hadlee of course, as well as useful bits and pieces players such as Coney. He was a pretty good captain of that lot.
My uncle was Hadlees doctor. And David Gowers, so there were always free tickets for the Trent Bridge tests from Hadlee.
0 -
Coneys tales of Richard Hadlees house on the second day were also fantastic. I hope they are good friends...
0 -
Test Match Special's line up for this series has been outstanding. I suspect they're lining Vaughan up to take over from Agnew, but the New Zealand contingent are brilliant entertainment. Ian Smith is also pretty hilarious on Sky, though he did the first test on BBC as well. Coney might be the best of the lot though, I wish they had him for every series. And no Blowers. Good stuff. I like accuracy.
Coney flits between serious analysis and the ridiculous with great ease. He should be a TMS stalwart forever frankly. And he lives here anyway.
I didn't see much of it on the TV apart from the highlights stuff so missed most of Smiths output. I like him a lot too. I hope Vaughan isn't hanging about waiting for Aggers to feck off anytime soon either, I suppose he may take some of the old geezers space when they snuff it in due course but he is definitely settling in quite well to the cake and biscuits routine.
I've liked Coney since the first time I heard him doing the co commentary stuff, he's a good guy. Very self deprecating as are the bulk of NZ cricketers (apart from Sir Richard)
0 -
England have done it and well done Jimmy Anderson for taking the last wicket to join Fred Trueman on 307.
By a baw hair! They beat the rain by minutes really.
After all the chat about the declaration and Trotts efforts to dig to Australia England did win that test in just over three days which is good going. You cant really complain too much about how they played this time, Broad had a decent series with the ball, in fact his figures over the five tests against NZ have been very very impressive. Anderson was good as usual, Finn bowled himself into a bit of form and Swann was back to his wicket taking best. The only real issue to address is the opening bat and having listened to the chat it seems that Compton will need a big score or two before the Ashes begins, he has looked very scratchy and is fiiled with self doubt. And Bells form is a bit of a worry but he is a class player and youd not drop him even though he hsnt been delivering for a wee while. Pietersen will probably come in for Bairstow, which is a bit tough on the boy really but he is good enough and has been blooded in tests now.
Should be a great summer of cricket
Listened to Jeremy Coneys tales of beating the Windies in that controversial series in NZ in the early 80s on TMS during the rain break, absolutely hilarious, as were his stories about the return revenge job in the Carribean. Coney is absolutely brilliant, I absolutely love listening to the guy.
0 -
New Orleans bourbon street chicken tonight. Oh yes!
I can sense that the wife is about to ask me for something expensive..
0 -
I might as well trump you all now by regaling you with tales of how my grandfather had Col. James Irwin over for dinner once and how he signed a poster for me and told me what it was like going up in a rocket and walking on the moon.
I was only about seven or eight years old right enough, but still pretty cool.
-1 -
Patrick Moore was much more interesting at this sort of stuff really. A bunch of council house clowns with cheap binoculars doesnt really cut the mustard.
0 -
Oh definitely. I have no idea what they were playing at last night. I said earlier in the thread, I thought they would have had a dash last night, got a 400+ lead and declared overnight. Maybe it is a conservative streak in Cook, I don't know, but it seems to me they really wanted their batsmen (Comton and Bell chiefly) to try and get a few runs for the sake of form. Maybe one of his bowlers has a niggle.
Listening to Trott after the close of play was revealing. Apart from getting a bit grumpy about the criticism of last nights performance he pretty much said the thought process behind this was so they didn't have to think about chasing 150 on that wicket. WT actual F??
Its fairly safe to say that this reveals a pretty conservative streak in the dressing room.
As for Compton and Bell, it revealed to us that Compton is probably struggling to keep his place in the side and that Bell got out on the slog. Theres quite a bit of cricket to be played before the ahses really so I'm not sure what the point was in not throttling the f**k out the game and keeping the foot down on their throats.
0 -
Totally disagree. England have already won the series. From England's perspective, a 1-0 series win is the same as a 2-0 series win. If this was Australia, nobody would quibble about the declaration. If the weather was set fair tomorrow, nobody would quibble.
You dont tend to get wins gift wrapped in test cricket, you make it happen. That last hour or so last night has fucked things up potentially if the hose gets turned on tomorrow as forecast. The declaration should have come earlier and they shoulkd have been more ruthless about it all. If they want to get back to number one in the world they need to win games, they will still win if they get an hour or two at them tomorrow morning, but knowing the forecast wasnt great they should have turned the screw. You get the brownie points for test wins and it all counts towards getting a better ranking.
Broadly I agree with you that the series is won and it doesn't REALLY matter whether they win or draw now, but I like to see ruthlessness, its ALWAYS a sign of a hardened test side. This looked like safety first rather than displaying supreme confidence in your bowlers abilities to skittle out a side. As a bowler I wanted my captain to throw me a ball and tell me to rip stumps out the fucking ground for him because he thought I would do just that for him.
For f**k sake, NZ have barely scored four hundred odd in the three innings theyve had combined so far in this series, there was f**k all chance theyd have got to three hundred odd never mind four hundred odd on a wearing, turning wicket.
Hopefully Cook learns a bit from it, even if they do win this test, he needs to be a bit bolder.
0 -
Looks like the declaration will be either over lunch or very soon afterwards. That was a better session for England, Cook gets his ton and Trott has been in a better frame of mind too. Maybe give him a few overs after lunch for a bit of a slog and see if he can get the hundred too?
0 -
I think it will have to be Root opening, after all it is his regular position. I would keep Trott where he is at present.
Even a KP with little cricket will be better than Compton who is quite frankly dreadful. Trott yesterday reminded me of Chris Tavare. Bell has slipped under the radar regarding his piss poor performances, though he always seems to come up with a score when the threat of the axe is hanging over him.
Work to be done with the England top six
Yeah I think Trott will stay put, he is a good number three. f**k knows what he was up to last night all the same, England had a bit of momentum with Cook scoring well, then Trott came in and started defending long hops, full tosses and half volleys.
We should see a bit of a thrash in the morning session today depending on the weather forecast and maybe a declaration before lunch which in theory gives England five sessions to get NZ out. I reckon they will do it today especially as the forecast for tomorrow is supposed to be shite.I dont understand why they declared yesterday either, unless it was to have a last look at Compton before sending him back to the counties
But I did feel sorry for the guy, you could tell he knew he basically had to get a big score or he was toast and he batted like his arms were tied together. But its the toughest of sports in that sense, and he has failed to deliver.If the weather stays ok today then England will win, probably today, NZ's batting is a fucking abortion. And thats a shame actually as their bowling has been very decent across both series really.
0 -
With KP back for the ashes I'd imagine he will come in for Compton, with Root moving up to open.
They have a bit of a problem with Pietersens lack of cricket since his op. He hasnt got very long to get a bit of cricket under his belt before it now. And with Bell looking a bit shit since his nightmare in the desert against Pakistan then England could be a bit dodgy.
I agree with shoving Root in to open, although I'm not sure how many options they really have. I suppose Trott COULD go in with Cook..
England might have a few decisions on their hands as the ashes series plays out.
0 -
Compton had better not be starting any of the ashes games. He has been found out and his head is a mess as well. Test cricket sorts out the wheat from the chaff and he is chaff.
0 -
Entirely agree. We'll see how it goes.
Trott entering into the spirit of Headingly and playing like Boycott. If CVook gets out swiftly tomorrow they should send for a Botham type to run the fucker out.
Was thinking about going down tomorrow with one of my mates but I dont think we are going to bother now. I'll just settle for work and TMS.
0 -
If only Paula Segio was here with his atrophysics based knowledge we might have gone further that cricking our necks looking up at the sky saying thats fucking awesome, I feel like a speck of dust like, you know, in the whole universe.
0
what??
Orange Walk / Scottish Cricket thread
in The General Nonsense Forum
Posted
He plays the bagpipes. Of course he is a fucking w****r.