well fan for life

Jordan White's heid has exploded from the looks of things.

Lamie's going to give me stomach ulcers this season.

Let's just go mental. Unleash Project: Barry Maguire Midfielder.

Peter Hartley looks like Quagmire when he discovered internet pornography in this.

Staggering amount of money to bring in. Particularly as it wasn't that long ago we were seeing folk like Murphy & Reynolds leave for effectively f**k all. Cannae be far off the amount needed for our Colossus Tony Straker statue now.

His attempt to cross with his left foot from the bye line after beating his man had me laughing / tearing my hear out in equal measure. It was exactly the kind of thing I expect to do myself when I get a game of fives after this lockdown pish.

I'm assuming we've got a sell on clause so I'd be alright if Turnbull ends the season on about 20 goals and a boatload of assists so we can chuck some more cash on to the fucking huge pile of it we've got in Burrows' office.

I'd probably be more concerned if the chairman was saying we're going to go spunking millions around the transfer market. Makes more sense to invest it in the club and carry on with the current model of developing players. Not that I'm ITK but that must make it well over £5 million Robinson's brought in in transfer fees since he took over which is unheard of. All the while we've probably paid a couple of nominal fees for players coming in. Probably one for the font of knowledge that is @capt_oats to confirm, though. FWIW Turnbull is 100% scoring at the weekend. Book it now.

At least we've got Bigi in town to sacrifice a lamb to atone for the sins.

I'm no expert on these kind of matters but as a ballpark figure we should be looking at around £5 million imo.

Newcastle being interested is intriguing. I wonder if we've sounded out loaning him out there.

I mean I don't wish any ill on him. He was just in the wrong job.

Craig Samson was utterly fucking hopeless. I don't tend to be a particularly angry individual but the circumstances around which we gave Samson the number 1 jersey still leaves me absolutely fucking seething. Mark O'Brien still astounds me that teams have actually paid him real money to play for them. A total shambles of a player. I'd say he was a carthorse but I think carthorses actually served some purpose in the world.

That went about as well as I thought it would.

At least this time my eyes can bleed in the comfort of my own home.

Lamie's handball might be the most fucking brainless things I have ever seen. Definitely capable of being a back up player but I am crossing everything that we'll get a fit McGinley and Carroll before too long.

https://www.cyclingweekly.com/news/racing/fabio-jakobsen-to-be-brought-out-of-induced-coma-this-afternoon-461972 Good news that he's out of a coma but I genuinely gasped at how horrific the injuries are:

One of the worst crashes I've seen. I know sprints are chaotic and there's a bit of jostling but that was absolutely awful from Groenewegen.

f**k Iain Vigurs. Clearly a talented player when he was with us but he was one lazy fucker.

I think we've reached peak @capt_oats content here.

Aye I've watched it back a few times and if he'd just stayed on his feet he'd have either body checked Gardyne or clipped his heels. Either of which would have been a booking and a wee ticking off from the ref. But flying into that at knee height, nowhere near the ball is nailed on for a red.

That tackle was laughable. Can see why it's a red tbh. I'm all for professional fouls but at least just have a wee pull on a jersey or that rather than scything someone in half. Seedorf looks good. Nobody else does.

We have been shit. And playing Turnbull wide left is absolutely mental behaviour.

There's yer Lang confirmed.

Or the mob that turn up at cup semis and finals belting out sectarian abuse for 90 minutes.