Dyzem

Hunger

Ha! I know the guy on the right, used to fire into a girl I know. Complete w**k.

Patch

Confusion

fat

c***s that post "underground music" youtube links to show off how cool and "musically educated" they are. You also get the p***ks that post links to really obscure stuff, typically hipster types, in order to achieve the same social handjob. c***s that PR for certain Glasgow clubs or work behind the bar and post "CHEAP DRINKS GET YOURSELF DOWN TO KUSHUNNNN!!!" - get to f**k. People that post far too many photos of themselves in the mirror, girls especially with their "different" make-up or cringey couples kissing in the mirror taking the photo with their mobile phone, instantly delete these c***s. Any lyrics, even if I know the song .. why are you posting them? Any coupley I-love-you-baby shit .. or anyone that calls their partner baby for that matter. c***s who post on comments trying to be funny, especially the arrogant "lad" types trying to make every word as Glaswegian and bammy looking as possible, even when they come from Partick. This. You're not hard. c***s that post pictures of themselves and/or their pals while theyre still out (unless they're genuinely humorous/interesting). There's so much more but that's enough.

Fruit

Old shoes

My girlfriend used to work in Sainsbury's and legally, they only have to ask the person who's buying the booze for ID. There have been countless times where I've been refused drink (or in one case, cigarettes) because I was with someone without ID which is total bullshit and nothing angers me more.

I'm away to Portugal on Saturday ... very excited. I hope youre excited for me too.

Moustache

M&S Lasagne. Know when you look at the back of a microwaveable meal and it says Microwave: 6 odd mins, Oven: 40 mins and you think .. who the f**k chooses to oven cook it? Trust me it pays off.

This. The fact that if I don't get over 8 hours sleep I'm completely shattered to the point where I'm falling asleep at work.