Doctor Manhattan
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Posts posted by Doctor Manhattan
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7 minutes ago, Venti said:
Fookin hell.
How is there not Squirrel-Man in the MCU?
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Squirrel_Girl
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We complain when other teams suss out our predictable shape and tactics, so this could be some Machiavellian masterstroke here. However, I suspect it’s more likely going to be a clusterfuck of biblical proportions.
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44 minutes ago, YassinMoutaouakil said:
It's really annoying that you're not allowed to play 12 men NGL.
If Butcher is half as good as I remember, and Biereth is half as good as I hope, there's a mathematical argument that this improves the team but still only adds up to 11.
Alternatively, we can just play without a 'keeper.
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56 minutes ago, Granny Danger said:
I’ve always thought that there would be a big overlap of religious fundamentalism and incest.
Maybe someone could produce a Venn Diagram.
Not quite what you were after, but in the ballpark...
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25 minutes ago, ICTChris said:
Remember the story about a 15 year who was carted off by a dozen police officers for saying that one of them looked like a “lesbian nan”? Well if you’ve been wondering what the lesbian nan copper has been up to, wonder no more! Here she is sorting out a disturbance in a Leeds street.
Pepper spray for everyone!
And this is why these c***s can't be trusted with guns.
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On 05/08/2023 at 22:06, CarrbridgeSaintee said:
Alex O'Connor AKA CosmicSkeptic is an atheist YouTuber who I'm a great fan of. He always debates in good faith and with an open mind. Articulate and highly intelligent.. I'm also highly jealous of his youth!
Here he takes on Christian philosopher William Lane Craig, who was a huge part in my journey to faith.
The topic is the Kalam Cosmological Argument.
I challenge anyone to completely understand what they are both on about! I think I 'got' most of it, but certainly not all!
If you think that one was a mindfuck, check out his latest...
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15 minutes ago, Shandon Par said:
Ryanair says “you ain’t gittin on no plane, suckas”
https://www.thescottishsun.co.uk/travel/11404899/we-were-abandoned-in-edinburgh-storm-babet/
My foot would never get tired kicking mope-faced, entitled, overreacting c***s like this in the baws.
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3 hours ago, Boghead ranter said:
Adi-DAS, not a-dee-das.
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Surely even the biggest w****r in the history of marketing (and that's a fairly crowded field) can't think it's a good idea to parade worried and/or grieving families before the press in front of a bunch of logos for the Tel Aviv Carlton.
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13 minutes ago, Granny Danger said:
Our electricity has been off from 8.30 this morning. By a massive stroke of misfortune we did our big monthly shop Tuesday and yesterday and there’s loads of stuff in the freezer.
Mrs Granny is freaking out a bit. “What can we do?” she is asking. The response of “Hope that it comes back on soon.” is not going down a bundle.
Scant consolation perhaps, but if the worst comes to the worst the household insurance most likely covers that sort of loss. Take pictures of the packed freezer now as evidence, as experience tells me that insurance companies are not the most trusting of souls. If you can put all the expensive stuff like fillet steaks and caviar at the top, so much the better
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1 minute ago, Granny Danger said:
There’s an interesting dividing line between imposing reasonable discipline and being a zealot.
Maybe the head teacher needs a good kicking. Maybe not.
I don't judge, as a rule, I just present the compo faces.
However, I suspect in this case there's blame on both sides. My own favourite is the lass who was punished for not completing her homework, the flimsy excuse being that she had weak eyesight and couldn't read the small print. It must have come upon her all of a sudden, that weak eyesight.
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46 minutes ago, Granny Danger said:
Okay, I also dislike him because he’s small.
To quote Frankie Boyle on Sunak, "He's so fucking small he can't go out at night in case he's taken by an owl."
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Here's a BOGOF for you.
Parents say strict school is breaching human rights
Gemma said her daughter was suspended for going to the toilet without permission
One student was reprimanded for her shoes being too shiny, her mother says
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10 hours ago, RuMoore said:
One day soon that c**t won't be faking it.
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46 minutes ago, ropy said:
Fuller
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21 minutes ago, Melanius Mullarkay said:
If its who I think it is, I know that speccy c**t's dad.
If said dad has a LinkedIn profile in which he describes himself as a "Doctor of light and space. A Social Justice Advocate", then being a speccy c**t appears to be hereditary.
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14 hours ago, Doctor Manhattan said:
Just worked out who Mr "I don't need to cheat at mathematics" reminds me of...
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3 minutes ago, velo army said:
I know I'm breaking the rules by providing no pictures, but I remembered the best compo photo I'd ever seen.
When working at TGI's we got a complaint from a guest that they'd gotten food poisoning from us and had been vomiting all night.
They'd sent a photo of a vomit-filled bog with one of them holding their TGI bill over the bowl as to provide the observer with a visual link between said boke and our establishment.
Absolutely fucking mental.
Just wait until those c***s at the Curry Cottage see what was in MY toilet this morning!
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Maths pupil stripped of GCSE amid cheating claim
His father said they are now seeking an apology - and compensation.
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3 minutes ago, tamthebam said:
I bought an Advent Calendar in Possil once. All the windows were boarded up.
More decades ago than I care to admit I played in a pub darts league. On our first visit of the year to Dawson's Bar in Craigneuk our opponents proudly pointed out the new wire guards that had been installed outside to protect their pillbox-like windows from flying bottles and the like. (For those unfamiliar with the area, this was an all too real hazard.)
Several months later we rolled up there again, and immediately noticed that the wire guards were missing, having apparently been ripped off. "Haha, typical Craigneuk, some c**t's stolen them", we laughed. The truth, however, was even funnier: they'd actually taken the wire off the outside themselves and reinstalled it on the inside!
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On 11/10/2023 at 22:20, Ewanandmoreagain said:
First ever episode of " Sherlock " with Benedict and the guy from the " U K. office " ( see other thread )
A bit far fetched , too quick at times but enjoyable
4 minutes ago, Ewanandmoreagain said:Episode TWO
Exciting stuff and Holmes is fairly running up the number of enemies.
Not as OTT as the first episode , but Phil Davies ? was brilliant in it
The guy from the office is running around like nobody's business and might have got himself a girlfriend if she is forgiving for nearly getting killed by the Chinese sect's agents
For some reason, I'm hearing these reviews in this voice...
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Tom Robinson Band - Blue Murder
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2 minutes ago, southernrover said:
I genuinely don't care what other people do (by and large) but, erm:
Bride Sarah Wilkinson saves for 20 years to wed herself - BBC News
She wed herself, and now she can go f**k herself.
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4 minutes ago, Hedgecutter said:
Earlier I had a sandwich advertised as 'ham, tomato & cheese, which was a PTTGOYN on two levels:
1) It contained ham, tomato, cheese & lettuce. I'm not sure what I expected them to do tbh given that you can't list every ingredient on a label, but it irked me that only the lettuce was omitted.
2) Shirley it should read 'cheese & tomato', not 'tomato & cheese'.
Won't be back.
Aye, f**k that stealth salad! They all do it, but M&S are the worst offenders. If my sandwich has ~50% spinach in it I at least expect to see that mentioned somewhere in the small print, but no.
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Things you want to share with P&B
in The General Nonsense Forum
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Video, or it didn't happen.