anonanist

I spent all of lockdown on my own. I have a hernia on my left wrist. Are the two connected? I just don't know.

My most recent partner gave me a 'Chinese burn'. On my knob. With her teeth. Gonnae no dae that! In fairness to her, I hadn't recently trimmed my finger nails - which had resulted in me accidentally cutting her in a very sensitive place. She described the experience as like "losing my virginity over again". That was 8 (eight) years ago. After which I gave up on the whole relationship thing.

Exactly. They're just the same as us, except they look amazing in hold-ups and open-crotch bodysuits. And we definitely don't. I hope. Oh dear!

Is there a tanning salon called Oompa Loompas?

Seemingly, eating breakfast and eating early are good ways to stay slim. It's something to do with kick-starting your metabolism in the morning, which then becomes sluggish later in the day.

I worry that the Pars are making a horrible mistake by giving up hard-won fan ownership to moneybags investors. I hope it goes well for them, but I'd rather see clubs plod along at their level than do something risky and regret it in the future.

Interesting one. In terms of Scottish football, Glasgow Irish and Edinburgh Irish seem to do well enough. There might be many a mongrel in London, resident or visiting, who would look at a London Caledonians favourably.

Maybe the ugly genius of the OF is that they never emphasise their geographical location, helping those with no Glasgow connection to identify themselves with those clubs for other reasons. I wonder if Queen of the South broaden their catchment/appeal by not having Dumfries in the name, and East Fife and Ross County bring in a larger support because they're not called Methil or Dingwall and so folk from a wider geographical area can identify with them and be loyal to them. On the other hand, maybe Albion Rovers and East Stirlingshire do worse because their names don't identify with their local communities. Maybe a community club such as Inverkeithing Hillfield Swifts could become a district club called Inverkeithing Fife Southern, attract enough support to go full time, and build a nice wee stadium on the site of the former paper mill. Who knows?

Or a top league of 8, play each team x4 (28 games), play an 8-team Championship x1 (8 games, 36 in total).

That sounds reasonable; looking at it from the base upwards is probably most people's first-hand experience of football, where travel costs rule out anything but local matches for league, occasional cup away days being the exciting exception. My view has been that League Two doesn't have too many big part-time clubs, so you might want to merge it with the Lowland League and have a LL East and a LL West, with Elgin going back to the Highland League (although I take your point there, I was thinking of what may be best for he majority of clubs at that level). My question is, since there are no fans at these games now, are travel costs no longer offset by revenues, changing the proportions in the equation for clubs and so making it unsustainable for many more clubs, along the lines of the example you gave but at a higher level, to continue with current league structures?

In fairness - what is the topic of this thread that are you posting on?

This idea looks familiar! Things to consider are: Top 16 - the winners of the middle section will qualify for at least a play off for Europe with 4th, but what happens when our co-efficient drops again and we only have four European places? Second tier - we usually have about 22 full time clubs, of which only 6 would be left at this level; you might need quite open promotion/relegation with Premiership to keep them in business. Also, a 12-team Championship would be better if you want a larger League One. Third tier - probably two automatic promotion places and promotion play offs required to keep the bigger division intereting; maybe 3, 4 and 5 in play offs with 10th in the Championship (if the Championship had 12 teams). Automatic promotion for pyramid play off winners should be possible with a larger League One/SPFL. The regional conferences you mention have some merits, but might end up generating too much uncertainty each and every season; just go for 18 or 20 teams playing home and away.

Comparing the travel distances for East Fife for the two scenarios mentioned (League One this coming season vs the proposed North Conference), I found the approximate one-way milages to be: North Conference Brora 193, Elgin 164, Brechin 57, Kelty 18, Cowdenbeath 15. Total 447. League One Dumbarton 74, Partick 61, Airdrie 52, Clyde 46, Falkirk 36. Total 272. I didn't add the milages for the away trips that both leagues would have in common - to Forfar, Montrose, Cove, and Peterhead.

I'm interested in this idea. A Lowland League Premier at tier 3 or 4, with the Highland League champions entering via play offs with, say, second in the LLP and second-bottom of L1 (or of Championship, if HL and LLP are at tier 3). Not fair on Elgin maybe, since they might have to return to the HL for a wee while, but might suit everyone else?

I worry about full-time clubs finding themselves in tier 3 for several seasons suffering from a gradual loss of supporters who never return. But sometimes a step down to become a big fish in a wee puddle can bring supporters out - their team winning more games because of the lower level can create momentum, as can the opportunity to rethink and go again. As I understand it, clubs at tier 2 want to play one another 4 times per League season as the larger away support of full-time opponents is mutually beneficial is bolstering clubs' finances; for that reason, I wonder if expansion beyond a 12-14 team Championship is viable for them until there is evidence of clubs with larger supports coming up from below. I wonder if the likes of Arbroath and Peterhead could go full-time after a few seasons alongside bigger clubs in the Championship, given their good home attendances. Certainly, clubs of a similar size as them such as Airdrie and Livingston have been or are full-time; Queen's Park are full-time this season (kit man required, if you fancy it?), East Kilbride are aiming to go full-time soon, and it wouldn't surprise me if Cove are or will be. I think any club with s decent catchment area, such as one from Cumbernauld or Glenrothes, or with a historically large following such as Pollock or Bo'ness might manage it. But then I'm in favour of having the long-term 'sugar daddy' to bring success to those clubs that then builds the supporter base for a full-time future. Like Ross County.