Toma_BullyWee

I can't sleep at all. There I was tucked up nicely in bed thinking happy thoughts, which quickly turned to thoughts on where I've went wrong in my life so far. Fucking brilliant, eh? Now I'm sitting here wide awake, yet extremely tired, thinking about how much of a f**k up I am.

Glasgow is lacking in decent jobs available.

Moby loves animals. Moby dislikes violence.

I imagined you to have hair down to yer arse, Kilt. Not a bloody baldy. What's that about? You also look a bit like Moby. "People they come together....."

It really doesn't look right seeing Clyde under the 2nd Division forum. We shouldn't be this far down the ladder. It isn't right.

Thanks. It all worked out alright in the end. Managed to get rat arsed after downing a cheeky half bottle of Monks Finest in George Square, then pretty much got molested off my friends ex boyfriend (...don't ask!), then we headed to a party on Bath Street. The party got interrupted by ra polis, though. So it was an unexpected end to the night, sadly. Uh oh. Who knows? You didn't piss of the Paisley Punisher did you? Never, ever anger Mr. Mehmet.

When you completely change your plans to accommodate someone else after they say at 6pm "Aye, I'll be round at yours at about 7, half 8. Don't bother getting booze, I've got plenty here so I'll just bring that round." Well, it's now 9:15 and that's me just finding out he's in the pub, drinking with the lovely inhabitants of Parkhead, in a hole of a pub. Now I'm late for the fucking 21st I'm going to, and stone cold sober. EDIT-= OH HERE WE FUCKING GO. I put my clippers on charge 2 hours ago so I could have a last minute shave before I went out. So I go into the room and turn them on, I start to work under my chin when the fucking battery runs out. I didn't turn the plug on. So now, not only am I late, sober and annoyed. I'm late, sober, annoyed, and I have a fucking single bald spot on my chin. f**k everything.

Play FM!

Doesn't work. I'm quite a hairy guy, and every now and again I'll give the pits a good seeing to. I don't sweat as much, but the first few days are horrible because of the constant itch. As for the suncream, I think I might have some somewhere, but I've given up. I'm going to go for a little FM session before I go out tonight. FM ----------- Going out. You know it's that good.

I really want to go out and enjoy the nice weather before getting blootered tonight, but it's just far too hot for me. I'm generally a sweaty person (please do not mistake sweaty for stinky) and if I went out in this I'd end up in a puddle. Plus, being a ginger I would probably turn into a big blister as well. A big blistery puddle. It's not a good look.

That's fantastic. You should be put off asking women if they have balls based on this act of violence. Go out tonight and ask another girl. Yes boys, I moisturise. Fucking deal with it.

I went up to my mates last night to have a few drinks for the game. 12pm came and his flatmate brought back another friend and his girlfriend, which meant a lot more drinking. I'm not feeling particularly brilliant.

The Celtic fan on here that posts under the name "khenny" in the Strachan Resigns thread. I tried to reason with him, I tried to have a conversation with him, but he's a fucking idiot.

Feeling the love guys. Actually, it's caused the skin on my feet to turn to shit as well. I hate feet, and always have done, but I used to sleep with my socks off. Now the only time my feet get some air is when I'm having a shower. My socks are never off because I don't want to look at this thing, and the thought of anything touching it without a sock covering it makes me feel sick, as daft as that sounds!

Self removal of a fucked toenail - is it possible without causing my toe some serious damage, or making myself cry? I'm a big boy, I can handle my pain, but this nail is driving my crazy. It hurts when I walk, It hurts when I sleep, and it gives me the heeby jeebies when I think about it. I'm also starting to play football again regularly next week, and I just know that some b*****d is going to stamp on my toe. That's how it all started in the first place. Just on the off chance someone here might have some useful information, the nail seems to have split into 2 now. The nail initially went black, and instead of growing outwards it grows upwards, so it's like a little ball, which has stopped me from being able to cut it for the last 8 months. A regular nail seems to be growing under it, slowly pushing the gomey nail further towards the end of my toe. Half of the nail is black, half is just normal. The bloody thing seems to be folding down the edge of my toe now, as I can feel it every step I take ( every move I make ). Help me. It's very annoying.

It's back, and stronger than ever. I think I'm going to have to just deal with it and head to the toilet to see what happens. That's me just noticed that. Well played.

Well, my arsebeat is gone. I don't know what happened, it just seemed to get slower and slower until..... nothing. What could this mean for me, will I die tonight? Is my arse pregnant? Is it the immigrants fault?

I have an arsebeat! My hoop is actually throbbing! I have no idea what is happening, and I'm not looking forward to finding out.

There we go. I must confess that at first I thought it might have been Ron, so I apologise because that's quite an insult.

xbl, then?

No, then? Anyway, my friend is clearly going out with an idiot, but he's too stupid/desperate to figure it out.

£40 from Villa, Man United, Chelsea and Arsenal. Not bad for £3.

Who is the Gray Ghost? I've completely forgotten. Anyway, I was at a party last night and we were all writing messages on the concrete with chalk for the girl who's leaving. Her driveway is pretty much vertical with a gap between the slabs where hundreds of wee stones are placed. Anyway, I was bent over writing a message when my foot slipped in the stones and I ended up on my belly sliding down this steep fucking driveway. Got a tiny wee scrape on my wrist, but it's one of those ones where it stings like f**k constantly. Quite annoying. Oh, I also smashed by balls against an open gate when I reached the bottom of the hill.

Manics - Me And Stephen Hawking.

Have a w**k. My PTTGOYN - I've been waiting since 10am for my hangover jobby, and I'm still nowhere near labour.