Granny Danger

Realising that the car I really enjoy driving the rest of the year is a piece of expensive German shit in icy conditions.

Quite right. It's like someone in Scotland opposing a repressive Zionist state in a far-away foreign country.

Passing through "your" airport early tomorrow on way to sunnier climes. If you're there try to be happy.

Quite like exuberant but nonetheless.

Sorted that for you.

Look on the bright side - yer team won't get humped this weekend.

Hadn't posted on GN for a few days - then post last night and get slagged off. Real PTTGOYN is people taking the Lunch Table thread waaaaay to seriously. Maybe they need more fibre in their diets.

Wondered who got custody of Michael Jackson's monkey - that's not gay it's bestial.

So baths are gay? I would have thouught that only applied if you were having a bath with someone of the same gender, and even then that would surely be a lifestyle choice. Important thing is do you feel clean? BTW good result on Saturday.

Serves you right for eating shit Mexican snacks.

Your lunch was alive when the fly landed on it? What were you having and how big was the fly?

Who do you think buys all the bridies. Think about it.

That's not very nice. If it weren't for us Dundonians the economy of Forfar would collapse and you would end up selling the Big Issue.

People don't tend to think I'm funny. They do however tend to think I'm ..................

And they say there's no serious crime in Forfar.

What's even funnier is that HSF was a male before the operation. BTW This is true.

I have a morbid fear of the rain as does my wife (it's how we first met many years ago but that's another story) so when we are caught in the rain it really is braving the rain. We obviously don't deiberately go out when we know it is going to rain but in recent weeks the it has gone from sunny to rain at short notice and we have been caught out a couple of times. Big problems. Probably not the source of the saying but it does apply to us.

There will be a time when you appreciate someone bring you "...shitey microwaved lasagne". There may even be a time when you appreciate your mum.

There are some complete tools in this world. You just need to accept this. Rise above it, you are a better man than he will ever be.

Away to have chicken, Florida salad and chips - WITH WINE. f**k the diet tonight.

Attention seeker.

I might be getting mixed up here but aren't you the guy who posted a picture of himself on here with a gold waistcoat and tie?

Having a go at our beautiful city AND posting your new address at the same time. Bad mistake. Bad, bad mistake.

Thank f**k. Mornings won't be the same without your moaning. Anything that delays this is good. Marx said "grumpy buggers of the world unite - you have nothing to loose but your will to live" (or something like that).