Not embarrassing at all mate, that's a serious situation to have experienced and the vast majority of people would feel pretty scarred by it one way or another. Are your family and friends aware of this in any depth? If not, they might be able to help you more with things like going out and about; making planned routes when walking to the supermarket, making sure you're not suddenly deserted on your own etc. Also, if they're able to help in any way, it might make you feel like you're not just trying to cope on your own. I don't know if this is a thing, but do GPs do appointments over the phone or anything? I know avoiding going out shouldn't be encouraged, but speaking to him/her over the phone and then gradually increasing it to face-to-face appointments might help. Means you're still speaking to your GP while going out a bit more at a time. It sounds like you and your mate were extremely unlucky in a wrong-place/wrong-time kinda thing, and it's such a shame that it's affecting you so much. Feel free to fire a PM over any time. I might not be much use but if you're just needing someone to talk to for whatever reason, don't hesitate