williemillersmoustache

Listen, all of the information just now is bullshit posturing from almost every source and the media are forced to either say very little or just lie to fill the gap. The reason for this is that some of the involved parties are up to no good and have a vested interest in not answering the fucking question so are just feeding bollocks to the journo's. Others are either unable to comment to ensure impartiality and adherence to correct practice or they feel able to step back and let things just run their course. This is, lets be clear, not good news for the buns. Sort of like the only time you see disciplinary procedures being properly followed at work is when your pal is definately getting the boot. Your pal will deny that he has hands or has ever breathed oxygen in a vain attempt to get off with it and the bosses will act all suspicious: "No-one said anything about a newco getting fired, who mentioned anything about a newco someone getting fired? Get on with your work pre-season." Leading me to believe we are ever so slowly creeping towards final deadline, the last play, the event horizon of renegers demise. Splendid. Now earlier on we talked about turning ibrox into some kind of sheep-shagger play park. I think it should be called the 'Govan Heavy Petting Zoo.' Any thoughts?

Ibrox as a sex tourism destination for the North Easts discerning mutton-ophile? Big wellies and velcro gloves on sale at what used to be the club shop? The chance to have your wicked way with a Bluefaced Leicester on the old penalty spot? I like it. Or convert it to a seminary with particularly good sporting facilities. Whichever annoys them more.

Oh well, that's a shame.....

Is that the widows son? Did you meet him on the square?

Just say no. I sat and wrote answers to all of his desperate bullshit, but you don't try and reason with a dog turd you just avoid it or if you do step in it, just scrape it off and walk on. What a total, total, total, cnut that man is. You know what? It's not fair on the orcs (and believe me I have such little regard for their feelings you'd need an electron microscope to see it). For them to read this and be led to believe that the club have some hope of getting the equivalent of a rap on the nose with a newspaper, when it's clearly bye - bye rover with the big blue injection, it's not on. Dragging it all out and continuing to raise their expectations is just cruel, tortuous stuff and just means when the inevitable happens the end will be all the more painful. Hang on... That's magic! Jim Traynor: Non-OF hero?

Courtesy of google translate: "The club Glasgow Rangers, institution of British football for over a hundred years, saw perhaps his last hours. It is indeed on the verge of bankruptcy and solutions to save him seem not to exist. The Rangers, it represents what?" Fantastique. Bravo monsieur, c'est formidable. Et, y at-il une banque près ici?

Keir Murray ‏@BBCKeirMurray Uh-oh, now it's a spat... The #SFA are quick to react to #Rangers' claim that Court of Session visit was only option: http://bbc.in/LqH4kR In a swift response to Rangers' statement, the SFA issued one of its own on Sunday evening. It read: "Referring the matter to the Court of Session, Rangers FC utilised the court's right of Supervisory Jurisdiction contained within Scots Law. "Given that any two parties can seek arbitration, the club was not 'prohibited from appealing to the Court of Arbitration for Sport', as was claimed. "Indeed, no representation was made by the club to the Scottish FA to discuss the possibility or the process of seeking arbitration via the Court of Arbitration for Sport before Judicial Review was actioned." Ha up yous. Spin is clever and to a certain extent an art form. Lies, now that’s just embarrassing. The only reason CAS was a closed door to renegers is that they'd be dead before they limped down the corridor. Dear Charles Green and your Mysteron(s), Thanks for injecting some new interest into this weekend. Up until now the only highlight has been that it totally pished it down all over the queens floating clusterfuck on the thames today. Also note the swift and decisive rebuttal from the SFA, on a bank holiday Sunday no less. Just practicing the use of your new found set of balls guys? Good.

This back and forth is getting a tad monotenous. So here are some tits: I hope that helps everyone. A good point well made I think.

Suspension is only a death sentence because of the enourmous financial trouble they're in. It is not up to the Appellate Tribunal to consider the ramifications. Imagine some bam gets sentenced to a year in jail for theft or whatever: "but i'll lose my job, the bank will take ma hoose and my bird will leave me" says the bam "oh all right then just say sorry, do 10 press ups and promise not to do it again." Suspension till the start of the season? Are you mad? You can't play again until we start playing. Bollocks. Although you are right that would be less severe than what amounts to a 1 match ban. Keep dreaming. Its the big hoose in the sky for your mob.

The unfortunate reality for you diddy fans (btw the mighty Dons are no diddy team ) is that nothing is going to happen over the long Jubilee weekend and the infinite source of fun that is this thread will go slow for a while. Can't kill the buns on the queens birthday, it'll be like typing google into google or crossing the stream in ghostbusters. We have to get over that and be patient till next week. But this is what will keep me warm through this rocky patch: I believe, deep down, that the SFA through a combination of finally discovering their testicles and the threats of serious violence done to their person from FIFA, that the buns licence will be suspended for next season. Effectively ending the charade that has been the rescue / administration process. The spin will be that it'll both punish the club severely (not in the eyes of most) and 'give them a chance to sort out the uncertainty surrounding their financial position'. No income next year, Green will scarper, no new interest in a stained dirty club that's not allowed to play. Toodle – fucking – ooh. Fat lady sings. If there was any possibility of the club surviving this it would have been done by now. The only reason that it has carried on so long is so the carrion birds can pick the carcass to the bone. In 18 months time the totality of Rangers FC will be reduced to 12 – 15 sad, dejected little men sitting round a social club meeting room looking like stoneybridge town council (ch4, absolutely, circa 1990) plotting the return of 'ra peeple'. Where will all the orcs be you ask? I'll tell you: They'll just walk melt away……. A majority (60% say) will reject football entirely and focus on golf, beating their wife, egg chasing or betting their brew money on fights between a pitbull and 4 starving ferrets. A significant minority (25%) who actually like football (the born again) will visit their local team for the first time. Maybe dabble in the juniors, perhaps follow the national team (shock horror) or get their fix from MOTD. Whatever, most of these unfortunates, with hard work and exposure to life away from great satan will, after 10-12 years, become inoffensive and perhaps not a total drain on society. Still wouldn't buy them a pint though. A very small number will remain loyal and hang around stoneybridge town council hoping for the impossible. Soon enough they'll lose faith and join group number 1. The rest (15%)? Where will they go? Next season when celtic romp to the title, during the last few away games of the season, one bhoy will look across the sea of green, in full irritating party mode, and see an old school chum. "Brilliant not seen him for years!" he thinks. "I never knew he was one of us. Hang on a minute didn't he have a rangers pencil case?" Bingo.

"> "Whatever doesn't kill you makes you stranger"

Ran out of greenies and discovered that you have a seperate daily quota for reddies. Awesome! And how handy for todays plague of 'them'. Did there used to be blueys until they were caught cheating, robbing and fucking the website next doors pittbull? Aww how sad for the blueys they had to die.

1h Cara Sulieman ‏@carasulieman #rangers have won - the decision has been referred back to appeal tribunal. My inherent revulsion to this statement was tempered by the fact that this is surely the very last time it'll be used in anger. So the buns have successfully taken the SFA to court for the right to chose "or death". Fine by me. In fact jolly jolly good.

Why Aren't They Past tense?

Kind of up to weehectorpar but muchos gracias. Keep the faith p&b'ers.

We Are (in)The Past

Imagine 12 office / banker / financially types all work from the same office and one of them, the loudest, flashest, smarmiest, most likely to rub your face in their success, pulls a full blown Nic Leeson. Makes a total arse-fraggle of his account and then gets caught bang to rights trying to shove the evidence into the shredder. If by some miracle of good luck and excessive goodwill this knobfumbler is allowed to continue in his post he had better craft the most exquisite, heart-felt apology and then proceed be the most humble, unassuming, pleasure to work with that the world has ever seen. Makes tea every 15 minutes and allows it to brew properly, in a nice pot that he bought especially just for his treasured co-workers. Goes around fixing that squeaky chair, brings in freshly baked doughnuts every day, and gets on with his work quietly and calmly not drawing any undue attention to himself except to be ultra-ultra helpful as often as is possible. Anyone seen any evidence of any post-f**k-up contrition round Govan way? Some hint that the club or the fans deserve some sympathy or assistance? No me neither. At every turn they demonstrate why any kind of clemency would be not just wasted on them but counter-productive. f**k off. f**k off you disgusting, vile, spoilt children. And never come back.

A word of caution! Chuckling at todays events while brushing my teeth I made the rash decision to stare straight into the mirror and say: "cockwomble, cockwomble, cockwomble" And who should appear, none other than SPL chairman Neil Doncaster ! He then proceeded to do absolutely f**k all. After a few awkward moments he buggered off mumbling something about acting in the best interests of blah blah blah........

Dropping your trousers and waggling your cock at the bus stop because exposing yourself in public really bites your bananna is equally distasteful as doing it just because your bored. And the same punishable offence. No.8 put yourself away.

Is this thread taking over your life? Have you worn out the F5 button on your lap top? Does your missus think you're having an online affair? Harry the Hibee said "I wanted to go to work, I really did, but every time I tried to get off my arse someone else posted a lol gif and that was me away again. For hours" "I've been getting funny looks from my boss, all i do all day is check my i-phone and laugh myself sick, it can't continue." Said some Arab. "I want to stop. But its just. *sniff* So.*sniff* F@#king. *sniff* Funny." Sobbed any Dons fan you care to meet. Don't worry folks you are not alone. I'd like to open my arms and invite you all of you to the first meeting of: The Big Rangers Administration Thread Anonymous or TBRAT(KACIH!) - A Here you can talk to like minded people about how funny this thread is and how it has affected your work and your private life. "When Bill Miller pulled out i thought it was the end. I didn't eat or sleep for 3 days. When I told my wife I've had nothing but pie and bovril for 72 hours, she said no wonder I looked awful. She just didn't understand" Wailed and anonymous fan of St Johnstone. We'll have free tea, coffee and of course jelly and ice cream for all. And if you think you're ready, start you on a 12 step programme to get you off it. Alternatively Renegers could finally just curl up and die so we can all get on with our lives. Thanks to everyone who's commented on this thread it is pure essence of giggle, thank you so much. Personally I hope they drag out the inevitable just a bit longer. Now just..... one....more...refresh......

http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/scotland/17939195

May be premature but if I was chairing this press conference.....

Are they dead yet? No? *sigh*

All things considered i would much prefer this to be a more accurate allegory to the outcome of the rangersadministrationbigtaxcaseblueknightsEBTstramash. And whilst rangers in administration is a very worthy title i am considering news readers, bloggers and posters alike when i suggest a subtle rebranding of the 'rangers in crisis' catch all heading to something with a bit more zip. I humbly propose: currantbun-uppance Any other ideas for a quick, snappy title for us all to use would be greatly appreciated. Thanks to all who have contributed to this thread, its been magical so far.