McB

Nah, there isn't any orange juice, but there's plenty of teabags; more importantly, there's a tesco across the road which sells diet bru What the nurses and doctors get up to? That'll be drinking copious amounts of tea whilst moaning about boys, aye?

Pishley from London in half an hour? For Strongbow? I've found another bottle of wine anyway, so it's all good It won't be good tomorrow morning, but fck it.

My CD player is buggered, I've run out of wine just as the offies are closing, and the probably-soon-to-be-ex boyfriend is behaving like an arse. In decending order of importance.

Just re. the whole 'when to wean' debate, part of our second year uni course was embryology/obs and bits/paeds. As part of this, we had a lecture where after being told about the benefits of breastfeeding by some important midwifery person, various breastfeeding maws were supposed to chat with us. This was cut short after one of the burds' weans (aged almost four) wandered over to his maw, pulled repeatedly at the hem of her top, and shouted 'TIT!'

HAW!

I think I've got the flu. Meh. Wonder if I can convince work it's pig flu and wangle a couple of days off?

She probably does get it, and that's precisely why she's interested.

How can you say that? It's a work of genius

No, sadly. Not sure it would be the same anyway. Haigh Hall or Reading 98, when by all accounts they blew the main stage away (they were the headliners on the second stage) would have been amazing though.

'Don't buy Vauxhall cars, they're shit' That would be class.

I remember listening to yon gig live on the radio, used to have a copy of it somewhere (recorded onto tape! showing my age ) Treeeeemendous

A mash-up or original recording? Sounds amazing regardless, I shall have to investigate. Anyway, me - The Silencers - Bulletproof Heart

Oops. Alcohol is bad. Not plenty more who could put up with me. Unfortunately. See above! Ach, I've been offered a decent job in the West of Scotland, it's just maybe not what I saw myself doing. Ho-hum.

Men. The boyfriend knew I was applying for jobs in England, and told me he was fine with it. 'Oh aye, Newcastle's nice...not too far from Glasgow either... I'd be able to get a transfer through the work...' Now I've been offered a job I would kill for in the North of England. And he's thrown a wobbly. He likes his flat, likes Glasgow, would miss his mates, and wouldn't be able to get a transfer so would end up unemployed. In short, he doesn't want to move. Well why the f**k didn't you say so earlier? I now have less than 12 hours to decide whether the boyfriend is more important than a fantastic job. Fuxake.

Coldplay - 'Shiver'

I have been to two games this season. We've been utterly, utterly woeful in both. Coincidence? I fear not. Last season was clearly all my fault, I'm a jinx. I apologise in advance for Morton getting relegated next season. Why did I think moving home was such a good idea? Oh, and I managed to post this in the wrong thread on the first shot. Magic. I need another drink.

People who think that beacuse they're on a private ward (in a fecking NHS hospital), they can behave like an absolute dick, and I'll be OK with it. I haven't yet told a patient to get tae, but I was pretty fecking close tonight.

My maw. I love her to bits but she drives me mental. Back up the road for the weekend, and things were going really well until the interrogation started. 'You've lost weight again, haven't you?' No. 'I bet you're not eating properly, are you?' Eh? I'm eating fine maw, honest. (5 minutes pass) 'That top's a bit low cut, is it not?' Erm, not really. It's not like I'm at work... 'I think you ought to wear a camisole underneath it. It's virtually indecent!' Hmmm. (A further 10 minutes pass and some gin in consumed) 'Have you dyed your hair? You've dyed your hair, haven't you?' Erm, aye. And? 'I knew it' [smug smiley] (1 hour passes and a bottle and a half of wine is consumed) 'So, when is that horrible proddy boyfriend of yours going to make an honest woman of you?' Asking her why she'd want me to marry someone that she doesn't like didn't go down especially well...

Congrats SD and Mrs SD! Thomas is a top name, and the wee guy is very cute indeed

Canteens that a. call themselves 'restaurants' b. don't open until 8am c. look at you funny if you ask for a roll and bacon - apparently it's not a roll, it's a bap

Thanks to the vagaries of the NHS some of us haven't made more than one home game this season

Having an interview for a job I'd kill for (or at least commit culpable homicide for) and doing my best impersonation of a rabbit in the headlights. Again. Fuxake.

Too much information!

Elbow - 'Powder Blue' I think i love Guy Garvey

Meh. It's not allowing me to edit my post, apologies for the multiple typos. The reason that I was quite so raging was a. there wasn't a 'feck off, it's none of your business' option, and b. we were informed that if we didn't fill in the equal opportunities monitoring form our applications 'may' (for which read 'will') not be considered. New Zealand is looking more attractive by the day...