Aim Here

You know, if I was an Aberdeen fan trying to come up with material for a wee gloat at the Hibs, I think I'd have picked material closer to home. Derek re-enacting the last scene of The Graduate and whisking Funso off for a whirlwind romance seconds before he gets hitched to Hibs would work, or Hibs grimly relying on an iffy penalty decision to hang on to a 1-1 draw at Stirling, or just Aberdeen shithousing a result at every Hibs game last season. There's plenty of choices. Googling up the manager's previous clubs and dredging up old news stories about some fans annoyed at his career movies in the English lower leagues comes across as bit tryhard and obsessive, but maybe that's just me.

This Ojo guy is talking about Derek McInnes the way folks talk about meeting the love of their life in romance novels. Who are Hibernian Football Club to stand in the way of true love?

The reason Heckingbottom was our second choice was that Mike Appleton wanted a decent payoff if he was sacked and Hibs told him to bolt. I've every confidence that Rod Petrie would have crafted Hecky's managerial appointment contract for optimal sackability.

Ah yes, of course. The humour of your jape here is that you pretended to mistake a player from one team as a player from another and congratulated us on that basis - this is funny because you said something that wasn't true. A similar rich vein of humour along the lines of lying about your age or telling people your dad is dead when he isn't. I did wonder if you were actually pretending here, but I discounted it on the grounds that the joke is funnier if we really did have a player that could tap in the odd panenka now and again, and you were really congratulating us on that.

Umm, David Wilson is one of Stirling Albion's Lads...

I'm very much okay with a balls-to-the-wall season of free-scoring, free-conceding goal-madness. Pare the defence down to Daz, Hanlon and the offside trap, use the Famous Five era five man frontline as the strategic template, have Robbie Stockdale start work on set piece plays from the centre circle, and stipulate that conceding isn't so bad, as long as we end up scoring one more goal than we concede. It'd probably mean relegation again, but it would be a hell of a way to go.

Presumably one of these https://www.newsandstar.co.uk/news/17761378.football-fans-arrested-carlisle-united-v-hibernian-fc-match/ https://www.newsandstar.co.uk/news/17763439.police-investigate-second-violent-incident-carlisle-v-hibs-game/

Hecky only deals with goalkeepers whose name begins with 'M'. Rumour has it he's thinking of putting in a bid for McGregor sometime soon.

Scotsman and Herald running more or less diametrically opposed stories. At least one of these must surely be terrible journalism, unless Celtic really are hours away from having Neil Lennon at a press conference extolling the footballing prowess of some random kid he's never heard of.

Tech billionaire, presidential candidate, and Vietnam War POW crank Ross Perot has apparently died, though there are unconfirmed sightings of him in a forced labour camp outside Hanoi.

That's our third choice (or later) keeper getting a run out from the development team, so it's not likely to be a huge deal if he's utter gash, though sod's law would suggest that Marciano and Maxwell will end up breaking each other's knuckles in a freak arm wrestling accident just before a crucial cup tie or something.

It would mean one less song that we can sing at the Green-clad arsecheeks.

I'm starting to lose count of the number of times I have to point out that Hibs were never liquidated in 1991 and STF, god bless him, clearly misspoke. You've been linked multiple times to the Companies House Documents that are the actual undeniable proof of the fact that Hibs have an unbroken history going back to at least 1903 (unlike Rangers which has a history that starts in 2012), but you go back to the same old pants-on-fire posture. I recommend making a note to get yourself down your GP to see a neurologist about Alzheimer's or Korsakov's syndrome or similar. There's clearly something amiss. https://beta.companieshouse.gov.uk/company/SC005323/filing-history?page=13

The Jambo Birthers have their magnifying glasses and tinfoil caps at the ready. Can Ronald Gordon produce his long-form birth certificate for detailed forensic examination, and if not, how do we know he's not some Kenyan bloke called Derek? It's vitally important that we know this.

Week 1 - Dundee United

It's a twitter account that's about five hours old, spitting out daft rumours for fun. For the company owner to bother giving it any response whatsoever would be a big fail on that stewardship test.

Rest assured, the tache still maintains his role as SFA President. His firm, steady hand, will be on the tiller of Scottish fitba' guiding it effortlessly from iceberg to iceberg, and he will be a constant, all-powerful presence in the Scottish game for decades to come. You have nothing to fear.

Nah, you've got it wrong. We're *losing* money on McGinn. St Mirren are contractually obliged to to pay *us* the 75%.

We get a discount if we're buying SJM back off Villa, since we don't have to pay ourselves the follow-on fee - so we can outbid the other bidders with less money. We can use these Fantasy Premier League billions to bring McGinn home!

Really? Get him signed. Having Shankland scoring a late decider at Ibrox after getting on the arse end of a glorious shroo ball from whichever of Scotty Allan's legs has the Ibrox tattoo sounds like a very Hibs moment.

Because they've got a brand-new American owner in who has made a bunch of money and has decided to have some early retirement fun by buying a Scottish football team and splurging money on ill-advised signings? That can't happen here, surely.

So does that mean that Scunthorpe are trying hard to keep him, and more pertinently, if he signs for us, there'll be a ton of Scunthorpe folks covering their keyboards with tears, snotters and flecks of rage-spittle as they take to twitter and the fan forums to express their hatred and disgust at this guy's fickle treachery? If so, we need him signed up ASAP. I'm getting tired of EPL league two diddies patronising us with that 'oh, he'll do fine at *that* level' pish whenever we sign up their left-back as injury cover for Lewis Stevenson or whatever.

Billionaires? Americans? They do know we're not part of the English league system, right?

It's not obvious in that the length of the Sunderland contract hasn't apparently been disclosed, and some folks thought that it was a one-year deal. If it was, then the fact he's been retained would be very significant.