rambunctious Posted November 21, 2014 Share Posted November 21, 2014 (edited) When did everyone stop using "Thanks" or even "Yours sincerely" at the end of e-mails and start putting "Kind Regards", even when they don't know and have never met the recipient? I hate "Kind Regards". My work had us downgrade from "Kind Regards" to "Best Regards" as it just seemed a bit much. I normally just put "Cheers" as I hate how formal some people can be.This is maybe not quite so much a business-speak complaint as it is a general work annoyance. Our communications team had us change our email footer half a dozen times in the space of a couple of days while they were trying to find a format which would allow people reading our emails on a smartphone to dial our phone numbers with just a touch of the screen. Our phone numbers were to be changed from +44 (0) **** ****** to 0 **** ****** to 44 **** ****** before finally settling on 0044 **** ****** (amongst other changes). It was infuriating and will be utterly pointless. I very much doubt a customer would go to a competitor just because he can dial one of their salesman's numbers easier from his blackberry emails. Also, how and why is faxing still a thing? The first thing I do when I get a fax is scan it so I can save it on my computer and/or email it to someone. Edited November 21, 2014 by rambunctious 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
die hard doonhamer Posted November 21, 2014 Share Posted November 21, 2014 I use thanks when emailing a customer, cheers when it's internal or to a supplier. All the formal talk irritates me. Anyway, my real reason for being here is because I've just been given my appraisal document to fill out before my end of year appraisal. The document sums up this thread, it's horrible. "Skills bench" is a new one that I particularly enjoyed. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizfit Posted November 21, 2014 Share Posted November 21, 2014 I use thanks when emailing a customer, cheers when it's internal or to a supplier. All the formal talk irritates me. Anyway, my real reason for being here is because I've just been given my appraisal document to fill out before my end of year appraisal. The document sums up this thread, it's horrible. "Skills bench" is a new one that I particularly enjoyed. That sounds horrendous. I'm being given extra training. Instead of saying that I was told they had "opened new roads for myself" 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
die hard doonhamer Posted November 21, 2014 Share Posted November 21, 2014 That sounds horrendous. I'm being given extra training. Instead of saying that I was told they had "opened new roads for myself" Another part asks how I "live the company values", which I am sure you are familiar with. If I lived to "never rest" I'd die. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
weirdcal Posted November 22, 2014 Share Posted November 22, 2014 My work utilises a secure email system, ie prove you are you before you get personal details. The number of people acting on behalf of others telling you to send sensitive personal data unsecure or by fucking fax - that's right I can't get you to pass a security check so I will send it to a fax number you just plucked out the ether. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
banana Posted November 22, 2014 Share Posted November 22, 2014 I use thanks when emailing a customer, cheers when it's internal or to a supplier. All the formal talk irritates me. Anyway, my real reason for being here is because I've just been given my appraisal document to fill out before my end of year appraisal. The document sums up this thread, it's horrible. "Skills bench" is a new one that I particularly enjoyed. I've worked at everything from tiny companies through to massive global firms. Appraisal forms have been an absolute mess at every level - noone knows how to use them, from the individual employees to their bosses, to HR. They seem like something that is done so as to tick off a box on some HR policy checklist, not actually for any employee or company benefit. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BigMartyn86 Posted November 22, 2014 Share Posted November 22, 2014 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizfit Posted November 22, 2014 Share Posted November 22, 2014 Another part asks how I "live the company values", which I am sure you are familiar with. If I lived to "never rest" I'd die. My favourite is "we take the fear out of uncertainty" when I was told that I had to excuse myself from the room and smack my head against the toilet wall. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted November 22, 2014 Share Posted November 22, 2014 That sounds horrendous. I'm being given extra training. Instead of saying that I was told they had "opened new roads for myself" What they mean is you're as thick as shite and you're in for remedial training. The next thing willbe a "support package designed to maximise you performance in terms of quality and quantity," If you don't buck up it's the Ruud Gullit. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
cracowjambo Posted November 22, 2014 Share Posted November 22, 2014 What they mean is you're as thick as shite and you're in for remedial training. The next thing willbe a "support package designed to maximise you performance in terms of quality and quantity," If you don't buck up it's the Ruud Gullit. Did you experience this? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted November 22, 2014 Share Posted November 22, 2014 Did you experience this? I dish it out. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjc Posted November 22, 2014 Share Posted November 22, 2014 Can anyone explain a "hockey stick approach" to targets? What the actual f**k does that mean? Makes me want to use the "scattergun" approach in meetings.... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted November 22, 2014 Share Posted November 22, 2014 I use thanks when emailing a customer, cheers when it's internal or to a supplier. All the formal talk irritates me. Anyway, my real reason for being here is because I've just been given my appraisal document to fill out before my end of year appraisal. The document sums up this thread, it's horrible. "Skills bench" is a new one that I particularly enjoyed. Excellent! Must throw that one about someday. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DAFC Posted November 23, 2014 Share Posted November 23, 2014 Appraisals seem a bit pointless from my experience. It's not possible to get the top grade, goals never set and not followed up on. Waste of time and effort. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
oddly optomistic Posted November 23, 2014 Share Posted November 23, 2014 The s**t sandwich of you did this well, that was wrong but at least you tried sort of thing 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boghead ranter Posted November 23, 2014 Share Posted November 23, 2014 The s**t sandwich of you did this well, that was wrong but at least you tried sort of thing ah, the good old 'benefit burger'. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JamboMikey Posted November 24, 2014 Share Posted November 24, 2014 http://www.s1jobs.com/job/logistics-distribution/logistics-supply-chain/edinburgh/548322918.html What kind of responsibilities will I have? Using the baseline forecast and working closely with Sales, Customers, Insight and Marketing teams to ensure that all relevant intelligence is overlaid onto the forecast, in the short, medium and long term. Interrogating customer data sources, Heineken insights, Market insights to support forecast decision making – identifying trends/issues, challenging assumptions and creating action plans. Interrogate, influence and challenge customer forecasts to increase forecast lead times and accuracy. Working closely with the Demand Management Team to share forecast best practice and adopt efficient ways of working. Managing the supply chain communication between Heineken and the customer, where appropriate. Supporting the implementation of supply chain development plans with the customer, where appropriate. Developing the supply chain relationship between the Heineken and the customer. Regularly reviewing supply and forecast performance – creating and implementing appropriate improvement plans. Providing sales with analysis and insight to assist in the delivery of the commercial plan/ financial metrics. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mizfit Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 Me: is there anything else I can do for you? Customer: no just action my transaction and process my paperwork, I presume it'll take roughly a week to arrive. All the guy was doing was making his annual insurance payment and he has to say all that? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjc Posted November 25, 2014 Share Posted November 25, 2014 Me: is there anything else I can do for you? Customer: no just action my transaction and process my paperwork, I presume it'll take roughly a week to arrive. All the guy was doing was making his annual insurance payment and he has to say all that? Post his address on here & we'll go round and set fire to his house/car* *delete as applicable 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boghead ranter Posted December 1, 2014 Share Posted December 1, 2014 Module 4 of my employers' Cultural Workshop today. Entitled "Maintaining Relationship Bridges". 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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