monkfish Posted April 21, 2014 Share Posted April 21, 2014 I dislike kind regards, meaningless phrase. Didn't even realise "chase up" was shitspeak, but can now clearly see it is. I'm a terrible person 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted April 21, 2014 Share Posted April 21, 2014 I dislike kind regards, meaningless phrase. Didn't even realise "chase up" was shitspeak, but can now clearly see it is. I'm a terrible person i always use it on e-mails, because I don't mean it... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marsh Posted April 21, 2014 Share Posted April 21, 2014 A guy in our office calls any minor problem "a bag of spanners". 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Septentrional Wasp Posted April 21, 2014 Share Posted April 21, 2014 I dislike kind regards, meaningless phrase. Didn't even realise "chase up" was shitspeak, but can now clearly see it is. I'm a terrible person I, without exception, sign off all my work emails "Cheers." No matter if it's to my mate or a regional director. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
energyzone Posted April 21, 2014 Share Posted April 21, 2014 One that I hear CID using a lot is 'bottoming it out' and instead of sending an email to people to inform them of a change in policy etc it's not 'cascaded'. A couple more police classics:- Can you "link in" with.... Can you do me an "obligement" 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted April 21, 2014 Share Posted April 21, 2014 No blame culture is a good one, you just know when this is trotted out someone is going home walking like John Wayne. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
weirdcal Posted April 21, 2014 Share Posted April 21, 2014 I, without exception, sign off all my work emails "Cheers." No matter if it's to my mate or a regional director. internal emails get cheers, external get kind regards. "Thought showers" was one that came up in bullshit bingo once, never been heard again though. Not even sure it's a proper corporate bullshit phrase. that's cause some fuckwit decided its insulting to epileptics, prob the same said fuckwit that decided blackboards are now chalkboards 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LiamDFC Posted April 21, 2014 Share Posted April 21, 2014 'Tell Paul to stop fucking phoning me' is my favourite office phrase. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Oscar P Posted April 21, 2014 Share Posted April 21, 2014 http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=sBPl3VWV_XE 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Boghead ranter Posted April 22, 2014 Share Posted April 22, 2014 "on the same page" "Design your Problem Statement" "tree diagram" yes, I've been in training today. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vacamion Posted April 22, 2014 Share Posted April 22, 2014 Today's treat in a meeting down South was our "drive to minimise failure demand" - ie "let's all try to stop fvcking things up". 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dariusz Posted April 22, 2014 Share Posted April 22, 2014 Deep dive Pushback Upskill Brown Bag all used by complete c***s. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dosser-fae-the-shire Posted April 22, 2014 Share Posted April 22, 2014 Today's treat in a meeting down South was our "drive to minimise failure demand" - ie "let's all try to stop fvcking things up". Failure demand is a phrase used exclusively by c***s. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Maxsta Posted April 22, 2014 Share Posted April 22, 2014 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shtuggie Posted April 22, 2014 Share Posted April 22, 2014 Corporate speak w****r: "Who have you got looking after that work for the guys in Aberdeen?" Me "Jim" Corporate Speak w****r: "best get him in to see the boss so he can make sure he doesn't have two heads" Me: "Shut up" 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Diamond Oracle Posted April 22, 2014 Share Posted April 22, 2014 (edited) One that really grinds my gears is when someone says or types "I would be much obliged if..." f**k aff, you're no from the 1920s Edited April 22, 2014 by Diamond Oracle 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shtuggie Posted April 22, 2014 Share Posted April 22, 2014 Also, anyone who signs of an email with the first letter of their first name...usually the new media type who wears no shoes in their open plan office surrounded by pictures of nothing in particular. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Scary Bear Posted April 22, 2014 Share Posted April 22, 2014 A guy in our office calls any minor problem "a bag of spanners". Are you allowed to write 'problems' anymore? The word 'issues' seems to have replaced 'problems'. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nelsjfc Posted April 22, 2014 Share Posted April 22, 2014 I dislike kind regards, meaningless phrase. Didn't even realise "chase up" was shitspeak, but can now clearly see it is. I'm a terrible person Nor me. I think I use it almost daily. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RandomGuy. Posted April 22, 2014 Share Posted April 22, 2014 The stupid old cows who work in service department at garages seem to be developing this knack. You put a car in and when you go and collect it you get a 10 minute speel about chasing things down, interrogating the problems and about seven other nonsensical phrases. Then you ask "so whats was actually wrong with it?" and they tell you they couldn't locate any source to the problem and it would require more intense interrogation 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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