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Star Trek Movies...Ranked


scottsdad

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My own ranking of the Greatest Movie Franchise of All Time. 13 movies, made over almost 40 years. Feel free to disagree, fully in the knowledge that you are wrong for doing so.  Or do a Star Wars one.

European Super League

1. Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. Simply the best of the lot. This was very much a last chance saloon for ST. Had this one flopped it would have meant no spin-off shows, no further movies. Made for half the cost of the first, with action and emotion. Launched Kirsty Alley into a life of Cheers and hard-right politics.

2. Star Trek IV: The Voyage Home. No bad guy, time travel and a lot of humour. Genuine ensemble movie, well crafted. 

3. Star Trek: First Contact. The best of the Next Generation movies. Good story, proper baddies in the Borg, very enjoyable.

4. Star Trek VI: The Undiscovered Country. Last of the originals, a film based on the fall of the Berlin Wall. Genuinely good story. Let down a bit by the obvious re-using of Next Generation sets. 

5. Star Trek. The Chris Pine reboot's first outing was fun and enjoyable, yet done in a way that didn't tarnish the original. Should have been the start of something great but wasn't.

Championship

6. Star Trek III: The Search For Spock. Probably the most underrated ST movie. The crew became outlaws, destroyed the ship, rescued their friend and had the best Klingon baddie (Christopher Lloyd) of them all. As a side-note, Edward James Olmos was originally cast in that role but the producer dropped him as he was too short. 

7. Star Trek: Generations. Shoehorned attempt at getting the two crews working together. It worked in bits but otherwise was quite forgettable. The trailer for the movie was better than the movie itself.  In the original version, Kirk was shot dead. They re-did that ending after it played badly with test audiences.

8. Star Trek: Insurrection. Decent but forgettable run out of the Next Generation crew. Like a long episode. 

Seaside League

9. Star Trek V: The Final Frontier. The original idea, from Shatner, was that the crew would find God. Bad idea to start with, coupled with bad special effects, a bad script and poor direction. Forced humour. 

10. Star Trek Into Darkness. For the first two thirds, I would have had this as one of the very best movies. It was utterly awesome. Then came the last third, when the movie turned into an action parody of The Wrath of Khan, including reusing lines of script and plot. From hero to zero in 30 minutes. 

11. Star Trek: The Motion Picture. If you like hours and hours of watching people watch special effects through a viewscreen, this is for you. If you like plot, action, adventure and fun, this isn't. Gene Roddenberry wasn't allowed near a movie after this. 

12. Star Trek Beyond. An hour into this, my dad asked me "is there any plot here?". No there wasn't. This film was a franchise killer. 5 years and no sniff of a new movie, because this one stank the cinemas out. 

13. Star Trek: Nemesis. Another franchise killer, this time taking out the Next Generation crew. Data killed for no reason. Pisspoor story and direction. Since the original viewing at the cinema, I have never made it all the way through watching this again. even a young Tom Hardy couldn't save this pile of shite.

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33 minutes ago, scottsdad said:

Never seen it (or any Black Mirror).  Worthwhile?

Yes, definitely. You don't really have to watch in any order so would recommend starting with USS Callister and then seeing which ones you like the sound of if you enjoy that.

Edited by Bully Wee Villa
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18 hours ago, Clown Job said:

I think you’re being a bit harsh on Beyond tbh

If only it came out after Star Trek’09 instead 

Maybe, but it just doesn't seem like a Star Trek movie. All that nonsense about transporting whilst motorcycling. Enemy technology defeated by the fucking beastie Boys. Just awful all the way through.

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1 hour ago, scottsdad said:

Maybe, but it just doesn't seem like a Star Trek movie. All that nonsense about transporting whilst motorcycling. Enemy technology defeated by the fucking beastie Boys. Just awful all the way through.

Maybe I’m biased because I like the beastie boys!

 

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