smpar

Wee Jay for CM. The rest of the world can praise us for being such a loving, caring wee club.

f**k Dunfermline. I fancy supporting another team. Who's top of the EPL just now?

"Yes, yes, yes, yes, and mind yer ain business ya nosey auld cow."

There have been very few consistencies throughout all series, and it has never aimed for precise accuracy with regards to its continuity. Christ, look at the episode in series 5 where they're on the TV Show 'Blighty's Hardest Boozers.' That episode ends with about 30 members of a motorcycle gang circling the Clansman, presumably going in to kick f**k out of them. If that happened in this series, there'd be a P&B outcry that the next episode didn't start in the hospital with every cast member having broken bones after being beaten to a pulp by a bike gang.

Completely forgot about Winston's brother already. I'm not complaining that we haven't seen more of him as he was a pish character, but I am (pleasantly) surprised that we haven't seen more. It's a big shame re Methadone Mick tbh, his opening appearance under the bridge was good. Giving him another couple of lines here and there wouldn't have been a disaster, but the overload of such a weak character has been awful to watch.

Live commentary of the Celtic game today. I call it 'the Celtic game' as there has been minimal mention of an opposition, apart from a hilariously-patronising pat on the back from Liam McLeod to Inverness when they had past the 20 (TWENTY) minute mark without conceding to the almighty Glasgow Celtic.

I've noticed this too. I think they did it maybe two or three times throughout the first six series, and it's already been done at least once in each episode in this one.

Best by a distance for me too. The only disappointment for me was Isa's 'typing.' I know it's picky but it just looks shit. Good episode though, onion the dug was brilliant.

"Your dug's an arsehole!"

Isa v Peggy in the bake off and Jack and Victor with dugs is a promising start. Hope they don't make an arse of it here.

They are fucking lunatics.

I'm getting chest pains from laughing at this. Do Rangers fans genuinely believe this?

I can never remember what 51, 6 and 500 are in Roman Numerals. I'm fucking LIVID. Shamelessly stolen from Facebook.

You're moaning about a website where people give updates on their lives... whilst updating us all on what has recently happened in your life. I fucking love that.

That's Buckie 4-1 up at Gretna. Looks like it's a trip up north at the end of November!

VL found.

Should have told the nosey b*****d to mind his own business.

Heading into town to take back a big fucking throw that my girlfriend got but now doesn't want, then to go to the fancy dress shop (which will no doubt be absolutely mobbed) to get face paints for this shitey party I'm being dragged to. Watch the football scores and a couple of beers in between, I'd imagine.

Coffee, Carte Noir. Usually take milk in my coffee but we've none left.

Didn't stop him in Hard Nuts. "I'm on.. top of the world.."

Some decent lines and funny moments but there's been f**k all to the episodes so far.

What the f**k was that hoover shop stuff all about

Fergie's voice [emoji15]

Closely followed by a McDonald's.

Looks like Fergie and Sinead are making an appearance tonight! Looking forward to that.