well fan for life

Had my first significant off in a number of years at the weekend there. Can't be sure what caused me to lose traction on a downhill, whether it was road lines/oil/petrol etc but I went down a belter. Took a load of skin off my shoulders, my arse and I've got a big cut in my elbow. The main takeaway is that I was wearing a helmet that cracked right through with the force of the impact. It had MIPS built into it which I read reduced the chances of concussion and I thought that was a wee bonus at the time. Having comprehensively tested it now I cannot stress enough about how important a good helmet is. That was a road I must have cycled down hundreds and hundreds of times and it caught me by surprise.

Knowing the power this thread possesses I respectfully ask that you delete this before anyone notices.

#AnnounceCharlie

[Probably boring] Kevin de Bruyne negotiated his last contract using data and I am all in favour of it as an approach. https://trainingground.guru/articles/how-analytics-fc-helped-de-bruyne-negotiate-new-man-city-deal Tbh I'd be disappointed if anyone actively rejected use of data in football. Ultimately if you can use data to narrow your pool of targets down to folk who can add value to your team in terms of raw numbers then that's only a good thing. Obviously if they then turn out to be a w**k/want a fortune then you can get rid of them at that point. [/probably boring]

All I know about Casper Sloth is that he fucking loved a haircut.

Might be just because it's what I do every day but it baffles me how anyone could be against using data to inform your transfer strategy. Like I'd rather use raw numbers to narrow down who we are looking at then send some guy on a wild goose chase in a Vauxhall Astra. Robinson was tremendous as a manager. But I think in the end he fell on his transfer market shaped sword with the aforementioned Manzinga/Sloth/Ilic/Petracompetitionwinner type transfers. Like I don't mind signing folk who are a bit rough round the edges but when your entire team are like that it's a disaster waiting to happen.

The sound of that third goal.

I mean he'll fit right in with us then.

Not sure anyone can bring themselves to dislike this empire biscuit making, bed time story reading, big handsome b*****d.

*fixed that for you.

Never mind a worst XI. I reckon I'd have a tough time narrowing it down to a 23 26 man squad.

I mean we once signed a tribute act as a winger

Will there be pie & beans?

No to Magloire. For f**k sake please no Magloire. Also no to anyone in this Killie team. Big Weird Kyle is the kind of last resort player you roll the dice on but I would absolutely not want to put any hopes on him. The rest are total donkeys.

On the loan folk I assume they're at least sounding out Liam Kelly as a possibility. Maybe Jordan Roberts at a push. Hastie was in favour towards the end of the season but I'd only go near him if: a. The deal is permanent and b. There's no fee involved. I'm no having him lurking about and having to get dropped due to the fixtures only to get whipped away again in the however unlikely scenario he finds form. I suspect Fox has been offered to train in order to prove his fitness before he finds another club. Maybe similar with Dunne, but I'd have him on commentary if he's at a loose end. Cornelius is fairly unproven but I'd love him to turn out good. Worth another year at least. All things considered, bulleting 23 of these useless fucks has been the highlight of my season.

Regardless of whether Carson's back fit I want another goalkeeper in as a priority. I'm no exactly brimming with confidence about Trev's Weetabix knees.

With the exception of Allan Campbell all I will say is

2 of the best hours of television ever made. Being presented with a live turkey for the Christmas dinner was an unexpected moment.

His entire remit should be to sign arseholes. Sexy Motherwell seems a way off now unless Gboly's keen for another stint in ML1.

Celtic definitely chanced their arm when his injury cropped up in the medical. And you can't really blame them for that. Fair play to the club for sticking it out and in the end up we got basically as much as we were ever likely to get for him as a Motherwell player. I suspect basically all of the negotiation was done first time round and just had the caveat of showing he had a pair of functioning knees before the cheque was signed.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again. Getting actual cash money for Ben Heneghan is a great big laugh.

Big team found. Always had a suspicion you were an Edinburgh City die hard.