Sergeant Wilson

The Academy is better for(old) lazy binge alcoholics. You can sit in the upstairs bar and watch gigs. The tellys in the ABC are handy if you need emergency drink during a performance

Ken aye.

You can sit in the bar and watch the telly.

What we need here is a cunt-o-meter.

No problem with it at all. I was just saying like.

Are you? You've never said.

Why don't we give Hamas some land in Afghanistan or Iraq and leave them all to it?

Whose side are we on? Have any of them got anything we want? What do we get if we win? Any more Gaza jokes yet? "If they're bombing all the alcoholic scizophrenics, I'll be keeping my head down for a bit,"

Here's 2u Mrs Robinson........

Twit 2u.

Don't mess with my 2u.

Turkish Delight? Very la di da.

Has anyone made the Gaza joke yet?

What if you'd been run over? How embarrasing for your family collecting your belongings. Watch, wallet......cheese slices.

Of you chewing the dog?

www.buswanker.com

I currently get my music from a defrocked muslim dentist who's had his tongue and hands cut off for kicking the pie of his patients. You= figure of speech.

Not everyone gets salary while they are sick. If it's not in your contract of employment the employer need only pay SSP, which only lasts for 28 weeks.

You shouldn't be Peking! Anyway, heard at the Rob Roy game today. Two guys speaking as a sub warms up. "How's he no' playin' the day? He's fuckin' rubbish. Oh." Had to be there I suppose.

If you're still unfit you keep getting medical certificates and make a claim for whatever incapacity benefit is called these days. If pay is now nil or reduced then you might be entitled to some means tested benefits ie whatever Income Support is called now and Housing/Council tax benefit. Best ask at Jobcentre plus for properly up to date info. DLA is unlikely you'd need to be seriously incapacitated to qualify.

You don't sign on if you aren't capapble of work.

.....and if you do?

No one said paedophillia was going to be easy.

I did visit MI6 at their Vauxhall HQ, very interesting. Funnily enough I was passing the time last week and I did the on line tests for MI5 and 6 on their websites. I flunked MI5 and passed MI6.

Most, all probably, of my mates earn more than me. But they have stressful, dangerous jobs and will drop dead sooner rather than later. I've been blessed with a total lack of ambition which has put me in good stead. I have flexi time, a pension, good working conditions. I was born to serve Her Majesty.