The Other Foot

There was a thread years ago where someone asked which footballers might be closeted homosexuals. That must have come close to the worst. By the way, I'd shag Esther McVey.

I think the thing with Cummings was that he consistently banged them in for Hibs against better sides, and earned our undying approval as a result. Since he left, he's been meaningless at every other club.

A *** grass, you say? I'm sure I've heard of one of those before. I just can't put my finger on it...

Thank God we have so many Columbos and Miss Marples among the P&B ranks. Except you, @G51. You can be Monk.

Yep, the pedantic twat is correct. That's an unforgivable spelling mistake, and anyone who doesn't see the immediate need to change it is a peasant.

Albert it was.

Kylie, I'm not even sure your parents were born in 1985/6...

Though to be fair, if I did, indeed, have the wings of a sparrow and the arse of a crow...

And for the further avoidance of doubt, Rangers aren't really up to their knees in big trophies

"Oh Austin McCaaaaanny, Oh Austin McCaaaaanny, Oh Austin McCanny pledge his allegiance to the Pope, And so his family will remain in purgatory when they die."

Wait...doesn't every club sing the bonfire song? Including Hearts. But that's an aside. Sectarian AND/OR nationalist AND/OR historical AND/OR cultural songs being sung at football are cringe. There you are. The football policeman has spoken.

Wtf are shinpads for if you can get two gouges taken out your leg from a completely fair tackle?!

Jaysus. What managers are looking for a job at the mo? Is Fenlon still around? We'll take him. We'll take him, and we'll take Yogi as his Assistant.

I think you need to have a word with yourself.

Can you just explain this in a bit more depth, please? I'm pretty sure it's the kind of murky, sexist pseudo-comedy you'd here in a bar full of sexually-frustrated, cardigan-wearing Hearts fans in the 1950s, but I just want to make sure.

Kylie Reese's posts are the most tedious thing I've seen since The Terminator franchise came to an end.

"It's chanted by Hibs fans to rile the Sevco fans, both at Easter road and Ibrox, and thoroughly achieves its ambition every time" ...is the correct answer.

Celtic have forgotten how to beat us on our patch. That's all we've got going for us.

If you were a halibut and the Hibees were, collectively, a 14-oz swim-tail jig, you'd have been devoured by now.

I don't think anyone's disputing your story. I think they're questioning the complete whatthefuckery of proclaiming 'blood doesn't show on a maroon jersey'. Aye, and...

I worked at the 'Snecky one summer, and can confirm that the food contained no jizz, poo or bogies. Which is more than I can say for Chiquitos. Tough luck, @G51

Kyle Reese has been happier.