Florentine_Pogen

You mean she gave you the strap-on treatment in the gents bogs at Liquid ? Do tell..............

Aye, ex-paratrooper.

Even more disturbing, she looks like she's 45.

If you put your dick into her snatch you'll probably need some anti-gonorrhea shots.

You don't need geographic knowledge for someone who never existed Willie.

I saw it and being an auld basturt, I'm at a loss to understand why a lassie would want to do that TBH.

Dearie me, MT, you're a precious wee thing and no mistake. Jump oot that pram and pick up those toys.......As Aberdeen Bud has already mentioned, it was a bit of levity. A joke. A shitey attempt to get a cheap laugh at someone else's expense. Ho fucking ho. This is the internet. If I had a poond for every time I've been referred to as a Hivs c**t or worse............... [yt] [/yt]So here's the deal. If I offended you, or any other Doonhamers for that matter, I am truly sorry. As an act of contrition, I have already been into the garden, chopped down a birch tree and self-flaggellated with the smaller of the branches. Presently I am waiting for the BBQ to bring some charcoal to a white heat which I shall then spread on the gound and walk over as a further act of penance. Mea culpa, mea maxima culpa. (But remember, Sawney Bean and his incestuous cannibal clan lived down your way........... )

Is this that Dundee skank ? http://www.starnow.co.uk/cheryltimmons Her profile states :- Languages spokenEnglish Accents spokenUK English Shoorely she can do a fair Dundeh accent. Even with a full mouth.

That diatribe is pure hogwash. A litany of assumptions based on a wee cosy chat with the glib and shameless liar. How gullible and naiive can they get ? King and the present board of spivs and corporate raiders will once again f**k them over. We welcome the charade.

I'm not a wummin', honestly.........................................

Ruth Archer has just announced to David that she is with child. At her age !!!! Old people shouldn't be allowed to shag. I know I'm not.

Coming from inbred, backward Dumfries, I knew you would say that.

A tad tacky but I'm sure fun was had by all. However, doesn't it gladden your heart that you, nay we, were lucky enough in the life lottery to be born in a country where such events are freely allowed, are even looked upon as a novelty and that you are free to mock without fear of retribution ? (This message brought to you by Florentine Ministries, please give generously. )

Is it just my old eyes or does it say "Founded 1873" at the top of that bit of paper ?

Huh ? Are you replacing the laminate with tiles made from Californium 252 ?

"Spivcreem works perfectly on bus axles......." Quality mockage and deprecation there, sir. "When I confronted Mr Easdale with this newly found information and explained that this had crossed a line his response was that I to had also crossed a line and got personal. When I asked him to elaborate he stated that “I took the piss” and even slagged his hair on our facebook page." Why is Mr. Weavedale so sensitive about his hair ?

Steady, Sugarpop........there's only one of me.

Kinky, I'm stunned. R4 is a rock-solid bastion of English biscuit-ersed middle-classness personified by The Archers, whose token Scot is a semi-literate, skirt-chasing, jakey swineherd called Jazza. The thought of you sitting dans la cuisine, chez-toi, sipping a nice wee Chateauneuf du Pape and jerking off to Linda Snell's dulcet tones is quite mind-bending. Fip FM for me, all the way.

and you forgot to add:- outrageously bigotted outrageously ugly outrageously stupid outrageously gullible etcetera, etcetera................................................

"Dave King wants Ibrox to be signed over to the fans as collateral for ST cash." http://www.bbc.co.uk/sport/0/football/26579100 Really ?.........I think Hell will freeze over before the owner(s) of the stadium agree to that. On that point, just who owns the stadium ? Is this King's attempt to flush out the owner(s)?....."show us the deeds !" And let's not forget what the South African justiciary think of Mr. King......................... “The court are unanimous in finding that he [King] is a mendacious witness whose evidence should not be accepted on any issue unless it is supported by documents and other objective evidence. It was remarkable that King showed no sign of embarrassment or any emotion when he conceded that he had lied to the (SARS) commissioner in a number of his income tax returns. In our assessment, he is a glib and shameless liar.” Be careful berrz......be very careful............... Statement from Onion of Fannies :- "The Union of Fans are today urging every Rangers supporter to put their season ticket money into a trust where it will be held until certain assurances are received by the current board. These assurances will include the club providing supporters with a security over Ibrox stadium and the Auchenhowie training ground before season ticket money is released. This will ensure that the club’s most prized assets are not at risk if another funding crisis ensues. This initiative is the result of a detailed meeting between Union of Fans representatives and Dave King in Glasgow today. There is now a firm commitment from all parties to move forward. More details of the setup of the trust, trustees and how fans can take part will be released in the coming days. It is our intention to ensure that fans have full transparency of how the trust will work and we will keep them updated on a regular basis. We believe that if the board are happy to hand over security for the Albion car park and Edmiston House, in return for a high interest loan, then they should be happy to secure Ibrox and Auchenhowie for the supporters. The board have already publicly stated that they have no plans to use these assets to raise finance and we therefore see no reason why they would not comply with this request. It is clear from today’s meeting that Dave King shares the concerns of supporters with regard to the desperate need for investment in the club. He has indicated that he is willing to provide that investment by taking a lead role in a fan based initiative and we are fully supportive of the terms on which he wishes to do so. We have arranged to meet again early next week to move the plans forward once he has completed a series of further meetings over the weekend. We would hope to then be in a position to release specific details. We are extremely happy with what we see as a clear path forward to return Rangers to health and put the club on a secure footing, where it can challenge for the league and in Europe in the years to come. Without the investment being offered by Dave King and others, and with the current board planning to slash costs across the club, which could even delay our return to the top league, we fear that Rangers could be left in the wilderness for years to come. We would reiterate that our fans have an opportunity to play a major role in holding this board to account, securing our most prized assets for generations to come and ensuring that much needed investment is brought in for the benefit of the club and not others. We hope supporters will show their backing for this initiative, and Dave King, by taking part in the Union of Fans Blue Card display at Ibrox on Saturday." Death of a Thousand Cuts, methinks.

Oh.....eh, let's see.....bouquets of flowers, telegrams of congratulation, lapdancers, crates of Dom Perignon '61, lashings of ginger beer, Blackthorn cider up to the ceiling, Chick Young & Richard Wilson fluffing anyone wearing a Sevco badge.................... Basically, I'd expect to see anything that could be described a trapping of success, something that shouts this club is going somewhere. I don't see that. I don't see success. All I see is the the Govan Boys Brigade who have just knocked off the U-16 Sunday League.

Grant Adam, Airdrie keeper and alleged Sevco fifth columnist gave away a penalty after 100 seconds last night. Here's his attempt at saving it. Is it just me or does he dive to his left about 5 secs. before Elbows actually kicks the ball ? [yt] [/yt]