Cardinal Richelieu Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 (Couldn't resist. And in all seriousness, sorry to hear about your sister). 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 (Couldn't resist. And in all seriousness, sorry to hear about your sister). Gutted I never took along all my medals - bit out-blinded by the lad next to me. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swarley Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 This is a local area for local living people only. Dead people will not be tolerated. Funeral parlour proposal in neighbourhood leaves Manly residents appalled 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Master Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 Meanwhile, in Perth... Wedding guests spark brawl in McDonalds after piping themselves into restaurant wearing full Highland dress http://www.thecourier.co.uk/news/local/perth-kinross/wedding-guests-spark-brawl-in-mcdonalds-after-piping-themselves-into-restaurant-wearing-full-highland-dress-1.923858 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 Man threatened to cut off his testicles in Ninewells Hospital http://www.thecourier.co.uk/news/local/dundee/man-threatened-to-cut-off-his-testicles-in-ninewells-hospital-1.923792 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stu Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 Meanwhile, in Perth... Wedding guests spark brawl in McDonalds after piping themselves into restaurant wearing full Highland dress http://www.thecourier.co.uk/news/local/perth-kinross/wedding-guests-spark-brawl-in-mcdonalds-after-piping-themselves-into-restaurant-wearing-full-highland-dress-1.923858 Reminds me of this from a few years back (dunno why there's no pic): http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/local-news/newlyweds-reception-fish-chip-shop-2563054#KXwTOBtIUI6Jr2U2.97 No fighting on this occasion. Obviously more refined down here 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordieBoy80 Posted February 11, 2016 Share Posted February 11, 2016 It's the end of the world as we know it... http://www.fifereporter.com/fife-news/court/fife-man-thought-world-was-ending-and-ran-into-street-naked/ 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted February 12, 2016 Share Posted February 12, 2016 Housing boss calls one woman an old boot, bites one one the arse, calls another a flat slag and makes lewd comments about one tossing the caber...... on a team building exercise. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swarley Posted February 12, 2016 Share Posted February 12, 2016 Not quite the material for this thread bit I assume this story of a real life "Wolf Creek" has reached your shores? Backpackers 'escape murder attempt' in South Australia - http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-australia-35546513 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted February 13, 2016 Share Posted February 13, 2016 Dracula gets a job at the blood bank. Prison warning for animal sanctuary volunteer caught with bestial imagery http://www.thecourier.co.uk/news/local/fife/prison-warning-for-animal-sanctuary-volunteer-caught-with-bestial-imagery-1.924028 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tongue_tied_danny Posted February 13, 2016 Share Posted February 13, 2016 (edited) Dundee man drunkenly abuses McDonald's staff, then goes back in a few days later for his breakfast... http://www.thecourier.co.uk/news/local/dundee/man-forgot-he-drunkenly-abused-mcdonalds-staff-when-he-returned-to-order-breakfast-1.924160 Edited February 13, 2016 by tongue_tied_danny 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sherrif John Bunnell Posted February 14, 2016 Share Posted February 14, 2016 Tain woman currently in prison for shooting her neighbour in the face in a row over seagulls is sentenced to a further two years for scamming a childless couple out of £8k by faking pregnancy. Seagull row - http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/scottish-news/woman-admits-shooting-neighbour-head-6194622#RMsQqEgRaYwtqKvA.97 During an exchange between the pair, Mary reportedly called Brown a “fat smelly lesbian”. Brown reloaded the gun, pointed it at Mary and said: “If you say that again I will f*****g shoot you.” Brown’s friends said they heard Mary reply: “Shoot me then, you fat smelly lesbian”. Brown then pulled the trigger and said repeatedly: “I’ve just shot Mary.” Fake pregnancy - http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/scottish-news/two-year-sentence-scots-woman-7361246#SLHSdC4fomEbvvuW.97 Wid not. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Master Posted February 14, 2016 Share Posted February 14, 2016 Dundee man drunkenly abuses McDonald's staff, then goes back in a few days later for his breakfast... http://www.thecourier.co.uk/news/local/dundee/man-forgot-he-drunkenly-abused-mcdonalds-staff-when-he-returned-to-order-breakfast-1.924160 There's a definite theme emerging in the last few days. If you want a quiet life, don't visit McDonalds anywhere east of the Broxden Roundabout. http://www.thecourier.co.uk/news/local/angus-the-mearns/gun-shots-heard-as-armed-police-detain-men-at-mcdonalds-after-carnoustie-atm-raid-1.924000 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted February 16, 2016 Share Posted February 16, 2016 Get yerself down to Hoe Street for some tasty chicken and faeces. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Master Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 Putting aside the rights and wrongs of Scottish banknote acceptance in England, this is classic APILN stuff. It's just missing the sadface photo. http://www.thecourier.co.uk/news/local/dundee/it-has-gone-too-far-dundee-man-says-he-will-write-to-pm-if-scottish-money-keeps-getting-refused-in-england-1.924622 >Person getting irate over relatively trivial issue - check >Threat to write to the Prime Minister - check >Inaccurate quote from local M(S)P - check 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cardinal Richelieu Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 You forgot: > Incorrectly thinking that Scottish notes are legal tender in England. They're not even legal tender in Scotland ffs. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sherrif John Bunnell Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 (edited) Putting aside the rights and wrongs of Scottish banknote acceptance in England, this is classic APILN stuff. It's just missing the sadface photo. http://www.thecourier.co.uk/news/local/dundee/it-has-gone-too-far-dundee-man-says-he-will-write-to-pm-if-scottish-money-keeps-getting-refused-in-england-1.924622 >Person getting irate over relatively trivial issue - check >Threat to write to the Prime Minister - check >Inaccurate quote from local M(S)P - check The young cashier then reportedly responded: “Where’s Scotland?” I'm sure TK Maxx cashiers aren't troubling Mensa with applications, but I highly doubt this conversation took place. ETA - I'm always seething when I end up with a Northern Ireland banknote in my change and end up with the fear about shops accepting it. I usually take the cowards way out and use it in a self service machine. Edited February 17, 2016 by Sherrif John Bunnell 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 Wid not. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted February 17, 2016 Share Posted February 17, 2016 "Hey there wait a minute Mr Postman (watch the pish)" MAIL BAN AT FLATS AFTER POSTMAN SLIPS ON URINE http://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/2016/02/17/video-mail-ban-at-flats-after-postman-slips-on-urine/ I spent about 10 needless seconds wondering where this story took place. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zen Archer (Raconteur) Posted February 18, 2016 Share Posted February 18, 2016 (edited) Swarley gets his Hairy Panic out. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-australia-35600546 Someone beat me to it. Edited February 18, 2016 by Zen Archer 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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