Le Tout P'ti FC

4-0 Bo’ness. Dunipace missed a penalty at 0-0 which didn’t make much of a difference really. Bring back winter fitba. I’m puggled.

Prize and TV money for last season: £106,800. https://twitter.com/spflwatch/status/1665129997625880576?s=46&t=CZFg535gf7R8wkEonyL6Xg

Well done Cumnock!

There’s a portakabin newly installed at Linton Hotspur. If it survives the gala day* next week, I’ll believe it’s here for the season. Lots of fences going up. It looks a bit like Glastonbury over there. Nobody is getting in there without paying their admission fee. Other than the aforementioned geese, try prising a fiver off them, cup tie shared gate or nothing , they’re not paying you even if you’re Talbot and you’ve brought a wee clicker. * Gala day, or the “Whipman Play” as they insist on calling it in these parts. I’ll never yield. It’s a gala day. Even though it goes on for about eight days. The bloody horses will be knackered by the end of it.

Penalty to Glenrothes - missed! 5-3 Star. For now.

5-3 Star. Joint most goals I’ve seen in any game this season after… 5-3 Star when Stoneyburn came here in November.

4-3 Star. Ridiculous game.

4-2 Star.

3-2 Star. We have a game on our hands. Just about HT now. Nae Macaroni Pies left. Dash!

3-1 Star. Penalty for not terribly much.

3-0 Star. Playing some good stuff here. Three good goals and loads of chances. Glenrothes look pretty disjointed defensively. Haven’t been in the game at all. ps. Heard it’s Burntisland 0 Rosyth 1.

Chippy in East Lothian? Adriano’s in Dunbar is decent.

Star 2 Glenrothes 0.

The race begins to see who can be the first to put some fairy lights into a bottle of The Hearach whisky and stick it up on their Instagram. Harris whisky going on sale 23rd September. https://harrisdistillery.com/pages/be-here-pt-2?fbclid=IwAR2fyc3wZmXTYWwh9tdwPhZ3NrSwFabsRDp4q06BiWNhqi170AiOaTFynCE&mc_cid=bcbbd120ca&mc_eid=549f39087c&utm_campaign=bcbbd120ca-journal_global_2023_whi_har_behere2_COPY_01&utm_medium=email&utm_source=The Harris Distillery Journal %26 News&utm_term=0_-9bf71d4e4c-[LIST_EMAIL_ID]

At Ormiston v Craigroyston. Currently 2-1 to Ormiston as we approach HT. The guy on the Ormiston bench who made the “take the basketball off him” quip against the visiting No.6? Genuinely hope you find the enlightenment you clearly need, you nasty little racist. Perhaps not at the extreme end of the racist spectrum, but firmly on the spectrum and not acceptable.

A wheen of players re-signed today. Testimonials coming for McGachie, Stewart and Young. The Kieran McGachie testimonial will surely be against a European giant to befit his preeminent status in our game. I vote for Fenerbache. Gate prices for next season will be £14/£9/£5/-; compared to £12/£7/£7/- for the season just gone. Season tickets are £190/£120/£50/-. So £2 onto the gate price for Prime of Youth punters like myself. The sharper eyed among you will notice one of the categories (for Youths 12+) reduced. Continuation of free entry for U12s (the Wee Frees) is wonderful news, and in other news I have a 10yo boy to entertain of a Saturday! The article on the club website goes on to explain the investment made in the stadium since promotion (“six figures”), self funded from reserves, and that the club has not yet had access to any significant grant funding. But despite this, they quite simply have not attempted to flatten that slope, so tsk tsk. Which seems like a reasonable price rise to me, to pay £14 compared to, oh let’s pick a random example, paying £18(+?) to sit in a draughty stand in the Condescending Dome at another team in this league. So there you have it: a community club putting affordable gate prices at the heart of its strategy for another year, and spending within their means. What’s not to like there? Looking forward to seeing what the group stage of the League Cup brings to Bongo this Summer. Hoping for Hearts!

The 1,000 barrier has been burst for all competitions.

Average for league games 948.

Be afraid, be very afraid indeed. Linton Hotspur 10 Barca 1. Even Dundee United would take a result like that over Barca.

That was outstanding. A comfortable 3-0. Delighted to see Kieran score a double. He’s verging on a deity in these parts, and he’s a very nice man to boot. The opposition fans no doubt see him as a big cumbersome unit who makes a nuisance of himself. I’ve seen him coach a group of P1 kids and they absolutely loved his training. It’s great to see him play with a broad grin on his face. Huge crowd in today (2,000+), and hopefully this season is setting the foundation for a push upwards next season. I’ll be cheering on Albion Rovers for the play off.

Final push on Saturday. A win to secure 8th, a point to stay up in 9th. Either of which must count as a success for Year 1. A loss means Albion Rovers may be spared, and few could begrudge them that as they clearly had the better of the Rose over the course of the four meetings this season. Their 4-0 win at NDP was I think the biggest defeat of the season. The last visit of Elgin to NDP in November may, however, have marked the lowest ebb in an, at times, very long season. Elgin led 3-0 at HT after a defensive horror show, and at that point I think we all had the Rose condemned. Recent performances have been much more encouraging. The huge victory at Cliftonhill was hard fought and ultimately deserved on the day. (I still giggle sometimes at that daft offside decision against Kieran as the clock was being run down!) So overall a year of ups and downs. I will have made it along to 12 games by the season end, more than I’d perhaps imagined I would, but as Mantis said it is very handy having league games on the doorstep. Ps. yes, the pitch has a slope.

Looking forward to Linton Hotspur v Hawick Royal Albert being described as a Borders derby. Hawick is 46 miles away! (Every other team in that league is closer to West Linton than Hawick. The closest league team being Edinburgh College, at a mere 18 miles distant, and the closest EOSFL team being Penicuik at nine miles.) Had a walk past the ground this morning. Looks like they are putting up fencing to enclose the pitch. Couple of diggers down there as well, so something else is afoot. Excellent collection of spring lambs in the field next door, but currently no horses in the paddock, and no pigs next door either. The wintering geese have now left for the season, but they will be back and they use that field like a runway! (NB. The animals in the adjacent fields always outnumber the crowd at the game!)

Good grief. You go away from P&B for a few weeks and come back to find the team from your village has joined the EOSFL! I’m in no way ITK about them and will be as intrigued as you will be about where they will eventually settle in the pyramid! As a few others have commented, the ground is in top condition for joining the league at that level. There is a covered stand seating about 50, and uncovered standing / railed off from the pitch on either side thereof. Plus a small covered enclosure being built on the other side of the pitch (between the dugouts). Take say Ormiston, who have a very tidy ground. Linton Hotspur would I’d suggest mark a small improvement on that ground today, before any new works are completed. Some kind of building works are indeed taking place now behind the goal adjacent to the clubhouse. I expect the remainder of the pitch will need to be railed off and they might be doing something to expand the car parking behind the goals, judging by where the works taking place are. I’ll take a better look next time I wander past. The clubhouse itself is excellent. Changing rooms available for both teams and referees, showers and toilets. Kitchen area with pies (bring a change of clothes for gravy soaking) and best of all an honesty bar for cans of chilled T (they are not licensed so cannot sell booze). Plus a telly and a pool table. Playing surface is superb and very well maintained. A number of games will no doubt fall due to West Linton being amongst the coldest places on earth, but that besides I’d be surprised if a game is lost due to water logging. The one thing that will need a lot of work is the playing squad. I’ve seen the team a half dozen times or so since lockdown, and they’ve been solidly thrashed every time. Maybe I’ve picked bad games to watch, but I’d put them well behind the likes of Edinburgh College or West Calder from teams in that league I’ve recently seen. As regards where the facilities come from, my understanding is that the new primary school and some houses were built on their former pitch. The new ground is built on land which I believe was donated by a local farmer. So I’ve been told in the past. What is very evident is that the community aspect of the team is building every passing month. I regularly see a big turnout for the kids section and that’s ultimately what I suspect will be of most importance to the club. Crowds for games I’ve seen have hovered somewhere around 50 on average. Not tremendously well supported today, but then an EOSFL league team here could feasibly draw support from the nearby towns and villages of Carlops, Dolphinton, Biggar, Elsrickle and Broughton, so there’s a reasonable catchment area before you reach the neighbouring football teams in Penicuik, Peebles or Carluke. Before I go too far into my “Bonnyrigg where do I get parked” mode, the amenities of the village outwith the club for an away day fan are easily summarised. One pub in the centre, the Gordon Arms, and a co-op! That’s your lot. Local celebrities include me, and John Hartson lives just along the road. Not much else to add other than to wish them well. And to hope they draw Campbeltown Pupils away in a cup and let me have a seat on their bus!

No random matches for me last week. I was away scouting new clubs for the West of Scotland League. When this lot play Campbeltown Pupils, I can assure you I will be there home and away.

Port Ellen distillery is coming along. Just think, in only 10-12 years from now there might finally be a Port Ellen on the market that I can buy without remortgaging. There is also a rum distillery directly behind it which has newly opened since my last visit. Not sure how the other two “under construction” distilleries are coming along but I’ll hazard a guess that the one out by Bowmore isn’t.