Zen Archer (Raconteur)

Live audio stream. http://www.raithtv.info/ 0 - 0 H.T.

If your so outraged, why bring it up again ? Can you not see the lad is sensitive ?

He failed at his latest attempt, looks like he'll be there for a while yet. The c**t should have gone to Specsavers though. Edited for accuracy.

Are you ready for your close up, Miss Desmond ?

It could happen sooner than you think. Did he not announce recently that his parents were seperating ?

Mark Chapman. They shot JFK

Southern Cross ?

FIRST, He who smealt it, dealt it.

If Babestation is on, the Polis won't be far away. Hooray.

Hoo Fucking Ray, you've learned to channel hop.

Tell him/her, you can't go because your Sikh.

It's called a "Prolapse".

Are your neighbours having a party ?

Use the Bing search engine, type "stinker", enter, select images. Trawl through and see oor wee Lorraine Kelly in the nip.

Saw this on a Fishmongers van this morning, H4 DOK. Saw this tonight, T33TH P, hope the guy is a dentist.

I work for Fife Council, a few years ago a colleague applied for a university course through the department. It turned out that he needed an HND to qualify for the course. He had claimed at his interview and on his CV that he already had an HND. Bottom line is, he resigned and all shit rained down on the department, so from then on original certificates have to be presented.

I 69'd old women at T in the park.

I was at a wedding about 20 years ago and it all kicked off at the speeches. The Best man,( The Grooms Brother), announced,"Lifes a Bitch and then you marry one" Later on the Groom hinted at some previous animousity between the clans and said, "I realise we have not always seen eye to eye", at that, the respecive mothers stood up and moved their chairs away from the respective fathers. Until the dancing started, the atmosphere was Baltic.

Gay cards.

The planning permission was only a contingency in the event that we were promoted. This would have moved the various clubs from the main stand into that area, allowing for the expansion of hospitality. In escence, the club shop stays.

She was blushing and so het up you needed a fish slice to get her off her seat.

Did anyone see Judy getting all wet about his opponent, earlier on TV ?

Try this for info, http://www.digitaluk.co.uk/ If that didn't work, she's not the brains of the out fit, but she may take your mind of things.