Cardinal Richelieu

I've heard you work for Visa. Any chance of some free money mate?

I realise Saturday night is "drinking night", but is there a more hackneyed way of informing people than taking a photo of your pint? Tempted to post a picture of some lungs and posting "I'm breathing".

A friend on Facebook just posted a picture of his mate's baby and without a hint of irony, added the comment:

I was interested in swapping ideas with other experts. www.expertsexchange.com

Everything about sneakersonfoot.com suggests "scam"... from the annoying pop-ups with a faux bird trying to talk to you, to the "powered by nike" claim and no contact details except a gmail address.

Aye. But gawping at silicone-fuelled Hollywood bimbos isn't quite the same as having a "reality w**k" over some wee durty whom you already know. So I've heard. All my FB chums must be complete prudes... cannae mind the last time a bikini shot appeared in my news feed.

I was 13. I'm happy to report that I've been opening tins successfully for more than 2 decades. But only Heinz tins, cos they don't need a tin opener.

Re: the can opener laughery. I led a coddled life up until the point where both my maw and da were away and I was left to fend for myself at around the age of 13. I'm left-handed, yet had to witness my older sister point and laugh while I ham-fistedly tried to open my lunch with some alien device I'd never even tried to use. It took all my mental wherewithal not to use the knife I ended up stabbing the tin with on my sis.

I didn't have a migraine yesterday but phoned one in anyway. Now my all colleagues are full of concern and sympathy.

Precisely. I'm prepared to believe there's a lot we don't know about the case. But the good points that she puts forward are lost whenever she starts banging on about these things.

Just for a bit of balance in the Tia Sharp case. One FB friend who loves posting nonsense about skytrails and 9/11 posted this: http://truthseeker444.blogspot.co.uk/2012/08/tia-blog-stuart-hazell-at-this-stage-is.html So basically somebody is "at it".

Genius IMO. Costs them a couple of quid. Gets them a gazillion likes for a "no lose gamble". All of a sudden you're super-popular at the cost of 2 notes. Annoying aye... but if you insist on being friends with clubs or people who'll sign up for this sort of thing, then don't be surprised at your newsfeed getting filled up by your friends clicking "Like", left right and centre. I look forward to the first court-case where the "club" wins and the owner of the club/ticket decides to renege on their pledge. Would it be legally enforceable?

One of my favourite Simpson's episodes. Didn't realise you could get brown dots in Pie and Bovril... Your "friend" does sound absolutely mental. I've a few friends like that on Facebook, posting on Rangers, The New World Order etc. Although none of their posts annoy me as much as the "Like this post to stop world hunger". I "liked" one of these images once, then came back a couple of weeks later and reported that people were still dying of hunger .... the resulting opprobrium I received could not have been worse had I been the one scoffing all the third world's food.

I hope ffcsam looks like his / her avatar.

I might be up for this. I propose we all dress as our avatars for easy identification.

This has been doing the rounds amongst my hippy friends on Facebook.... Sounds good. Bagsy being one of the 9,999 who don't have to bother their arse doing anything.

Wow. Two posts in succession from sensible Rangers fans. Graham Roberts: "As a Gers fan, I'm delighted. No special treatment, got what we deserve. fresh start, cant wait for the season to begin!" Eddy Blair: "As a Rangers fan couldn't be more happier for Rangers getting in #Division3, rules were broken price paid #startover #bbcsportsound"

It's a bit difficult to have ambition when you're proposing completely new teams somehow gain precedence over clubs that have played in the league for more than a century.

Both "myriad..." and "myriad of..." are widely used and accepted. Myriad can be both an adjective and a verb. Independent Grammar Police Complaints Commission.

Go on girl. You deserve it. Have one on me lol xxxx

Saw Ken Loach's latest An Angel's Share. Much funnier and less realistic than some of his previous films. Still enjoyed it. Not sure why it had subtitles though (at a showing in Glasgow). Maybe it was a deaf showing. Anyway, 8/10.

Would someone mind posting the GIF of a rising "The Big Hoose" guy again? I know it's somewhere in this thread, but at 1773 pages, it'll take a while to find. ; There's a lovely green dot in it for the first person to post it. Thanks

Watched a couple of French films recently that are quite good... Tell No-one: A guy's wife is brutally murdered 8 years earlier, but all of a sudden she starts sending him emails and appearing in live web-cams. What's going on? Obviously telling you would spoil the film... it's all a bit far-fetched - similar to The Game - but it's an enjoyable flick nonetheless. 7.5 out of 10. Hidden: Someone starts sending surveillance tapes to an ordinary French family. Understandably, the fact that someone is recording their daily movement freaks them out so the Dad tries to find out who is doing it. Defo not a Hollywood-type thriller. The ending might disappoint some as it doesn't conform to the traditional "Person X did Deed Y to achieve Goal Z" - but the question marks it leaves add to the enjoyment. 9 out of 10. Also went to see The Dictator... not half-as-funny as watching the reactions of "real" people in Borat / Bruno. 5 out of 10.

I've thought up a fun new game. Six degrees of separation (from the pernicious influence of the Holy Roman Catholic Church). Think of your favourite blue-nose, then try and link them in as few steps as possible to the Celtic cause, then forward to RangersMedia / Leggoland / D+P for scrutiny. I'll start with Ally McCoist... Ally McCoist was a panellist on the popular BBC quiz-show, "A Question of Sport". Sue Barker is the presenter of the show Sue Barker used to be in a relationship with Cliff Richard Cliff Richard's property manager is John McElynn, a former Catholic Priest. Ergo, Ally McCoist is dirty papist / tarrier / Catholic apologist.