Chippyminton

@chattyman I fucking knew one of you clever Jags laddies would rumble him. Forgot to say = the tubby wee specky fella also told me that Ian McCall was the mastermind behind this entire clandestine project - being paid ONE MILLION SCOTTISH POUNDS per day. And folk also wonder why Nicola Sturgeon suddenly resigned without warning? Turns out that she'd been exposed as the designer of the bit of wire which made the holes. Just think about the skull implant surgery figure it out for yourselves. Her hair was dark brown and long. Then blonde and medium. Then ginger and short. And so on and so on. A cover-up if ever I saw one. It just has to be true. All of it.

Fair play to you for saying that. It's a crying shame that you've been so royally fucked over by the SPFL insanity of endless Friday nights. For our upcoming game with you for example, it's a 5-hour, 250-mile return drive to Gayfield after a day at work, which is likely to deter so many fans with an actual job - resulting in a lower attendance, a shite game atmosphere and massively reduced, much-needed gate revenue for Lichties. Aye - I know we all support different teams, but I've always believed that most decent folk on the forum are fair-minded fitba supporters above all else, and none of us enjoy seeing fellow teams disadvantaged in this way.

That machine making holes in the pitch represents the apocalyptic future of Scottish fitba, my friends. They aren't drainage holes at all - that machine's punching out a dimensionally-perfect sectional grid and injecting infra-red receptors in to every hole so that player positions can be microscopically mapped by GPS. Coaches can then feed data into a secret computer programme which generates constantly-updating player positions and tactical predictions, which get directly imported into player's heads via a skull-implanted microchip and sophisticated NASA-invented AI techniques. Or Bluetooth. Or something like that. A tubby wee specky fella in The Norseman told me today just as he was downing his 48th shot of Laphroaig before our game against Cove - so it MUST be true. Look at the absolute fucking state of some Championship players 'trendy haircuts' and witness the SPFL chip implant surgery cover-up for yourselves. But the tech still isn't perfect. He also told me that it was secretly tried out last night using Ayr vs Raith as a test-bed. The GPS fucked up really badly, putting both sides into a 1-8-1 or 0-10-0 formation for most of the game. Terms and conditions apply.

You'd better believe it, laddie. Fabulous result against an on-form Accies today, fair play to Queens. You're still 100% the team to beat, and you aren't top of the division by accident. The next few weeks will be enthralling for all of us.

Apart from thoroughly enjoying the ongoing Mystic Lex delights, I don't have anything to contribute. I just wanted to be featured on page 666 of the thread for posterity.

We rode our luck, snatching a win from the jaws of defeat - but 100% fair play to Cove for making it so difficult for us as @virginton so eloquently expressed. This league's mental. Any team can seemingly beat any other on any given day - and for reasons unknown, Morton's jaw-dropping expertise at turning in outstanding performances beating the top 2 in the division on the bounce, and then struggling against the so-called 'lesser' teams, is arse-puckering in the extreme. Teams who don't actually appear to be 'lesser' at all, given the quality of much of Cove's output today. Maybe this emotional 'we're invincible one week then exposed and vulnerable the next' rollercoaster is exactly why this league's so compelling. But whatever - the surrounding results (including the Ayr/Raith debacle last night) worked in our favour, we finally have a full, good-quality bench with its associated options to change the team shape if needed, so 3 ground-out points - and overall, we're in a good place despite the sphincter-clenching display of today. Mon the Ton.

Maguire's obviously no stranger to a fish supper and battered Mars Bar. Unless that gut's actually a slipped chest?

x 5 so far .......

It's like watching your own toenails grow. I suddenly realised what Ayr fans have been moaning about. Dreadful, uninspiring game. A crime against fitba. Amy Irons is the total highlight of tonight.

Cheers. Dougie Imrie already has a great track record of getting the best out of his signings, so the future's bright. It's a great signing for us. In his statement, he offered his gratitude to St. Johnstone for allowing this to happen - so fair play to you lads. All the best.

Morton sign Ali Crawford on a loan deal from St. Johnstone until the end of the season. A potentially great addition to our squad.

Exactly. Arbroath have done us over twice this season, and they thoroughly deserved both wins.. Potential smoke-flavoured, maroon-coloured banana skin right there.

We’ve got Arbroath on a Friday night, too. 5-hour 250-mile round trip. Virtually impossible after a day at work. Don’t think any of these games will feature much away support which is a shame.

I was. Bottom of the league at kickoff - and they trousered you. Even as a Morton supporter, it's heartwarming to see a struggling team pull themselves up by the bootlaces and hit a great run of form. Fair play Accies.

Agreed, MT. Jai's knock looked like a groin strain to me - but he's a big, tough laddie and these normally fix quite quickly, so fingers crossed. Have a listen to the 'Just One Cornetto' podcast about the Dundee game - they're pretty much paraphrasing exactly what you said. Blues had a stellar game, so did Pigniatello - and as you say, the back 4 were superb. We're at the stage now where the top 4/5 are very closely matched and single results can often have a significant effect on positions - it's very much a case of remaining totally consistent, and waiting for the other contenders to screw up.

And fair play to you for doing so. I'm quite sure Cove will give of their absolute best and make it as difficult as possible for us. Some so-called ‘easy’ games have proved to be banana skins for us. But there are no easy games in this looney-tunes league, with anyone seeming capable of beating anyone else on the day. Good luck to you.

Your posts are always objective and fair, CR1922. Unlike anything ever posted by a Dees fan throughout the entire history of the forum.

It was past its sell-by date after the first week. The fact that they haven't been able to come up with anything better, speaks volumes about the pond-life intelligence level af that toxic wart on the arse of Tayside.

The best possible result for us. Fair play to the Jags, commiserations to the Honest Men.

And fair play to Ayr for doing so. The absolute state of that JF post ....

Huge for both sides today indeed. Although I'd like to see The Honest Men wipe the floor with them - the best result for us would be a Jags win. Given the events of this last week, however, they'll either come out raging and blitzkrieg Somerset Park to try and prove a point, or they'll capitulate as soon as Ayr hit the net and spend the rest of the game with their heads between their knees. Will be an interesting one for sure.

Aye? *Cuts his'sel a nice slice o' sabre-tooth-tiger-and-dinosaur pie, washes it doon wi' a cup o' La Brea tar-pit Bovril*

What? From my seat, I saw two totally committed teams with total respect for each others abilities - with every player turning up and completely going at it from the outset until the death. A game between two almost-identically-matched teams, where one out-of-the-blue goal was always going to be the decider. An exciting, hugely entertaining game of fitba whose result was never going to be 100% certain until the final whistle. Are you sure you weren't watching a YouTube replay from 1963?

Plus - 'President of the World' which you forgot to mention. But Friday night, on the swally, just troosered Dundee - I'll allow it.

There must be so many outsiders like me who can't get their heads around this whole baffling situation. A 'strategic decision' which hacks off the fans and everyone else, which must have an overwhelmingly negative effect on player morale, and throws a young guy in at the deep end - a young guy who obviously looks up to the manager he's (temporarily?) replacing and is gutted for him? I wouldn't wish this on any club and I really hope yous get this sorted out sooner rather than later. I also feel very sorry for McCall given his long tenure at the club and his expressed desire to hit the 1000-game milestone. Although I know this was nothing to do with the result at Rangers, it must make it even harder to take after you gave such a good account of yourselves and really went at it.