velo army Posted June 14, 2022 Share Posted June 14, 2022 16 hours ago, RH33 said: By this time next year she'll be texting you to tell you shes a they and is pansexual and non binary...... She'll be a teenager by this point. Absolutely no way she's texting daddio unless it's for a lift. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dons_1988 Posted June 14, 2022 Share Posted June 14, 2022 2 hours ago, velo army said: What she'll learn if you give in is that her moods and expression of feelings can get her what she wants. It also teaches her that other people are responsible for her feelings. I've known many adult women who are like this (and some fellas) and most of this learning can be traced back to their early years teaching. What I've seen done by my parenting geek pals (who are, unlike me, parents) is to ignore the tantrum, but do the minimum to make sure she is safe, while maintaining a neutral tone. What they also do is when she's being "good" is to reward that with positive attention. One more thing, and I think this is really fucking important. The key to bringing up children to be secure and self loving adults is to be a good enough parent. Not a great one (Winnacott, 1953). I've seen a few of your posts and I glean that you care a lot and you're intimidated by the enormity of the task at hand (and perhaps exaggerating the perceived consequences of fucking up?). You'll mess it up mate, but that will teach your bairn that people f**k up and that the world doesn't revolve around them and their feelings. I imagine bringing her up as a Dons fan will help this also . She sounds ace. Thanks mate, I know all that to be true but you’re right I do see it a huge task and fear not getting it right. We’ll be grand but there’s probably more going on than I necessarily want to share on here that worries me. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RH33 Posted June 14, 2022 Share Posted June 14, 2022 13 minutes ago, Dons_1988 said: Thanks mate, I know all that to be true but you’re right I do see it a huge task and fear not getting it right. We’ll be grand but there’s probably more going on than I necessarily want to share on here that worries me. How is your partner now? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Honest Saints Fan Posted June 14, 2022 Share Posted June 14, 2022 Our 3 year old has some magnificent tantrums. I am far too relaxed to be a parent and often have to go out the room and laugh at the tantrums. His behaviour in the last few weeks has been a massive improvement including his sleep and he said to me the other morning after a full night in his own bed with no shouting "mummy are you proud of me" 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
velo army Posted June 15, 2022 Share Posted June 15, 2022 Dad.mp4 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the snudge Posted June 16, 2022 Share Posted June 16, 2022 I was at the bus stop this morning tking my 4 and 10 year old daughters to nursery and school. Some creepy older guy at the bus stop was doing that whole looking at my ten year old up and down type of thing. Just pure bad vibes off the guy. It wasn't just once or twice. I wasn't sure what to do. I made it well aware that I was watching him. He stopped after that and looked like a scolded dog. I wasn't going to make a scene because I don't know if he mightve had something medically wrong or that and I look like an arsehole but my gut told me he was dodgy. It was very unnerving to be honest and I've not experienced anything like that. What would you have done? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Moonster Posted June 20, 2022 Share Posted June 20, 2022 A week on from our girl getting here and what a shit week we've had. My girlfriend was determined to breastfeed but by Thursday night it was clear that not only was she not well at all but the wean was not getting what she needed. We thought it was just the stress and tiredness of breastfeeding not working which had affected her but by Friday morning she was admitted to the RAH with liver problems and we had to switch fully to formula. The last two days were incredibly hard to deal with but thankfully she has improved and we got home earlier tonight with some strong medication. The wean has taken to formula well though and what a difference in her, it's nice to get 3 hours of sleep every now and then. It looks like we'll have a few weeks of hospital trips to check my girlfriends bloods etc. but I'm just glad she's home. She also had snoring problems that disappeared during pregnancy, but I now lie here with a constant snore on my left and a beautiful wee shitey arsed angel to my right and I wouldn't change it for the world. 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PWL Posted June 20, 2022 Share Posted June 20, 2022 5 hours ago, The Moonster said: My girlfriend was determined to breastfeed but by Thursday night it was clear that not only was she not well at all but the wean was not getting what she needed. Good to hear the three of you are getting on much better. Ive said on here before but the breastfeeding fascists that drum into folks heads that they are some sort of 'bad mother' for turning to formula need a good slap. My first was over 9lb and Mrs lost a lot of blood during delivery. She was in no fit state and baby was of a size where he needed a full tank full. Both were struggling so I just took decision to go bottle. What a difference. She got rest she needed to recover and baby got sufficient feed to settle. Midwife's couldnt be nicer but the breast feeding Nazis treated me like a pariah. Feck em. Second one was even bigger so we gave it 12 hours of trying before going formula. You've done the right thing for the three of you. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RH33 Posted June 20, 2022 Share Posted June 20, 2022 1 hour ago, PWL said: Good to hear the three of you are getting on much better. Ive said on here before but the breastfeeding fascists that drum into folks heads that they are some sort of 'bad mother' for turning to formula need a good slap. My first was over 9lb and Mrs lost a lot of blood during delivery. She was in no fit state and baby was of a size where he needed a full tank full. Both were struggling so I just took decision to go bottle. What a difference. She got rest she needed to recover and baby got sufficient feed to settle. Midwife's couldnt be nicer but the breast feeding Nazis treated me like a pariah. Feck em. Second one was even bigger so we gave it 12 hours of trying before going formula. You've done the right thing for the three of you. It pains me having to agree with @PWL, but there we have it. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottsdad Posted June 20, 2022 Share Posted June 20, 2022 1 hour ago, PWL said: Good to hear the three of you are getting on much better. Ive said on here before but the breastfeeding fascists that drum into folks heads that they are some sort of 'bad mother' for turning to formula need a good slap. My first was over 9lb and Mrs lost a lot of blood during delivery. She was in no fit state and baby was of a size where he needed a full tank full. Both were struggling so I just took decision to go bottle. What a difference. She got rest she needed to recover and baby got sufficient feed to settle. Midwife's couldnt be nicer but the breast feeding Nazis treated me like a pariah. Feck em. Second one was even bigger so we gave it 12 hours of trying before going formula. You've done the right thing for the three of you. 100%. We always bottle fed our kids. It meant that we could both feed them, splitting the work. And it did them no harm at all. Scott is 6 foot 2. My daughter, aged 12, is taller than her 25 year old half sister. Cannot say at all that bottle feeding them has stunted them in any way. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Moonster Posted June 20, 2022 Share Posted June 20, 2022 3 hours ago, PWL said: Good to hear the three of you are getting on much better. Ive said on here before but the breastfeeding fascists that drum into folks heads that they are some sort of 'bad mother' for turning to formula need a good slap. My first was over 9lb and Mrs lost a lot of blood during delivery. She was in no fit state and baby was of a size where he needed a full tank full. Both were struggling so I just took decision to go bottle. What a difference. She got rest she needed to recover and baby got sufficient feed to settle. Midwife's couldnt be nicer but the breast feeding Nazis treated me like a pariah. Feck em. Second one was even bigger so we gave it 12 hours of trying before going formula. You've done the right thing for the three of you. Aye, she felt guilty having to stop breastfeeding on Thursday but now she sees the difference in the baby it's just a no brainer. The midwives are all brilliant and have been fully supportive but we also had a specific breastfeeding women out to the house and whilst she was lovely, she definitely was of the mind to keep her breastfeeding in some capacity and it became a bit of a war between the midwife saying "don't listen to her" and the breastfeeding woman saying "oh its great for your baby if you can keep it going even if its just now and then". I also think the fact we hadn't been to a single ante-natal class (all classes off for "covid reasons" and we didn't have much option for private classes) it didn't really give her the opportunity to talk to people who have been through it. Wean just been weighed this morning and she's up on her birth weight after losing 9% in the first few days, so we're delighted. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RH33 Posted June 20, 2022 Share Posted June 20, 2022 10 minutes ago, The Moonster said: Aye, she felt guilty having to stop breastfeeding on Thursday but now she sees the difference in the baby it's just a no brainer. The midwives are all brilliant and have been fully supportive but we also had a specific breastfeeding women out to the house and whilst she was lovely, she definitely was of the mind to keep her breastfeeding in some capacity and it became a bit of a war between the midwife saying "don't listen to her" and the breastfeeding woman saying "oh its great for your baby if you can keep it going even if its just now and then". I also think the fact we hadn't been to a single ante-natal class (all classes off for "covid reasons" and we didn't have much option for private classes) it didn't really give her the opportunity to talk to people who have been through it. Wean just been weighed this morning and she's up on her birth weight after losing 9% in the first few days, so we're delighted. Great news regarding weight. My son took weeks to regain his birth weight. Not helped but the bf nazi core. I hadn't been to any anti natal classes either because I couldn't be arsed. Or read any magazines or books. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottsdad Posted June 20, 2022 Share Posted June 20, 2022 School awards ceremony this afternoon, and then leavers assembly tomorrow. Why they couldn't have done these together is beyond me. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottsdad Posted June 20, 2022 Share Posted June 20, 2022 3 hours ago, scottsdad said: School awards ceremony this afternoon, and then leavers assembly tomorrow. Why they couldn't have done these together is beyond me. Fucking hell. Just back from this. In a sweltering sports hall surrounded by the local scum, this event went on for over an hour. It seemed like three. Will to live was certainly slipping away. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bairnardo Posted June 20, 2022 Share Posted June 20, 2022 Was at my wee lassies dance show tonight. She done really well, but what surprised me was how much I enjoyed the rest of the show. Not normally something I can be fucked with but it was class. Could see her buzzing watching the older kids and grown ups performing and now she is determined she's going to get to their level. Very inspirational all round. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FK1Bairn Posted June 21, 2022 Share Posted June 21, 2022 Anybody else's child still come through to your bed during the night? My son is 6 and he has been coming through beside his mum and I every night for the last fortnight, before that he was sleeping all night in his own bed for months 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The_Kincardine Posted June 21, 2022 Share Posted June 21, 2022 17 minutes ago, FK1Bairn said: Anybody else's child still come through to your bed during the night? My son is 6 and he has been coming through beside his mum and I every night for the last fortnight, before that he was sleeping all night in his own bed for months All my three did. Their maw usually directed them to my side of the bed and I'd cuddle them until they fell asleep then carry them back to their room. It's normal. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted June 21, 2022 Share Posted June 21, 2022 Greatgrandson visited last night. He was a wee bit tired, I think the heat had tired him out, but he was in good enough form, sat on his mother's knee, eating chocolate biscuits and throwing soft toys about, playing with his first cousins once removed. As soon as dad came in the door after cutting our grass he was ready for the road. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottsdad Posted June 21, 2022 Share Posted June 21, 2022 34 minutes ago, Jacksgranda said: Greatgrandson visited last night. He was a wee bit tired, I think the heat had tired him out, but he was in good enough form, sat on his mother's knee, eating chocolate biscuits and throwing soft toys about, playing with his first cousins once removed. As soon as dad came in the door after cutting our grass he was ready for the road. What is a first cousin once removed? Isn't that a second cousin? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arab_joe Posted June 21, 2022 Share Posted June 21, 2022 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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