Adam Posted December 22, 2021 Share Posted December 22, 2021 Does anyone else have children that are clatty wee b*****ds? My kids share a room when they’re here, and up until yesterday I would be in there every day tidying up their mess, making the beds, taking out glasses, plates, food wrappers etc…Ended up having a heads gone moment with them both yesterday over the state of their bedroom, and I’m now refusing to enter the pit, if they want to live like pigs in shit then they can fire away.I’m quite a clean freak so perhaps I am being too harsh on a 13 year old and a 10 year old, but I remember being pretty tidy, even hoovering at 10 for my Mum. They get asked to do f**k all when they’re here, but just asking them to pick up their clothes is a pure chore. As mentioned, I’m now at the stage that if they want to live like that them I’m letting them charge on. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
die hard doonhamer Posted December 22, 2021 Share Posted December 22, 2021 7 minutes ago, Adam said: Does anyone else have children that are clatty wee b*****ds? My kids share a room when they’re here, and up until yesterday I would be in there every day tidying up their mess, making the beds, taking out glasses, plates, food wrappers etc… Ended up having a heads gone moment with them both yesterday over the state of their bedroom, and I’m now refusing to enter the pit, if they want to live like pigs in shit then they can fire away. I’m quite a clean freak so perhaps I am being too harsh on a 13 year old and a 10 year old, but I remember being pretty tidy, even hoovering at 10 for my Mum. They get asked to do f**k all when they’re here, but just asking them to pick up their clothes is a pure chore. As mentioned, I’m now at the stage that if they want to live like that them I’m letting them charge on. My eldest, who is the same age as your youngest, is exactly the same. It does my box in, but I know I was exactly the same at that age. I’ve tried various things to get him to keep on top of it, and sometimes they work for a couple of days, but invariably it’s back to being an absolute shit tip before long. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adam Posted December 22, 2021 Share Posted December 22, 2021 My eldest, who is the same age as your youngest, is exactly the same. It does my box in, but I know I was exactly the same at that age. I’ve tried various things to get him to keep on top of it, and sometimes they work for a couple of days, but invariably it’s back to being an absolute shit tip before long. Yeah, been down the bribery route, taking things off them until it’s tidy, and like you say it works, but just goes back to normal a few days later.Not even the mess that annoys me, it’s the washing stuffed down the side of beds, fruit peelings under desks, half eaten sandwiches left lying, it’s bogging. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andy Dufresne Posted December 22, 2021 Share Posted December 22, 2021 This now the 4th xmas since the kids have had contact from their mother,they do not ask for her.Just glad the wee one has a fantastic dad. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buchan30 Posted December 22, 2021 Share Posted December 22, 2021 Does anyone else have children that are clatty wee b*****ds? My kids share a room when they’re here, and up until yesterday I would be in there every day tidying up their mess, making the beds, taking out glasses, plates, food wrappers etc…Ended up having a heads gone moment with them both yesterday over the state of their bedroom, and I’m now refusing to enter the pit, if they want to live like pigs in shit then they can fire away.I’m quite a clean freak so perhaps I am being too harsh on a 13 year old and a 10 year old, but I remember being pretty tidy, even hoovering at 10 for my Mum. They get asked to do f**k all when they’re here, but just asking them to pick up their clothes is a pure chore. As mentioned, I’m now at the stage that if they want to live like that them I’m letting them charge on.Might be an unpopular opinion. But i just gave up asking my two (aged 12 and 14) and realised the 5 minutes it takes to do it myself is worth avoiding the 2 hours repeating myself and trying to find ways to do it. When they were younger and had things like lego, i would put it into piles and get them to “help” put it away and praise them for doing so. Thinking this will encourage them to tidy after themselves, but that just went out the window as they have gotten older. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adam Posted December 22, 2021 Share Posted December 22, 2021 This now the 4th xmas since the kids have had contact from their mother,they do not ask for her.Just glad the wee one has a fantastic dad.Must be difficult for them, but you’re doing a smashing job with them both. Have either you or June heard from her? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andy Dufresne Posted December 22, 2021 Share Posted December 22, 2021 4 minutes ago, Adam said: Must be difficult for them, but you’re doing a smashing job with them both. Have either you or June heard from her? Nope nothing and neither have the social work. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adam Posted December 22, 2021 Share Posted December 22, 2021 Nope nothing and neither have the social work.Such a shame, the kids deserve better, but you are doing everything you can to give them a stable home environment, totally take my hat off to you both, they’ll be so, so grateful when they’re older.It could be that she is ashamed and worries about the reception she would get should she get in touch. Not saying it is an excuse, but if it were me I perhaps wouldn’t close the door completely to her should she get in touch in future. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Adam Posted December 22, 2021 Share Posted December 22, 2021 Might be an unpopular opinion. But i just gave up asking my two (aged 12 and 14) and realised the 5 minutes it takes to do it myself is worth avoiding the 2 hours repeating myself and trying to find ways to do it. When they were younger and had things like lego, i would put it into piles and get them to “help” put it away and praise them for doing so. Thinking this will encourage them to tidy after themselves, but that just went out the window as they have gotten older. I’ve basically done the same as what you are doing since day dot, but I’m fed up with it all. I cook everything, do their dishes, clean the house, their washing etc… I don’t think I’m asking much by asking them to clean round their room and make sure it isn’t a hazard; my youngest son stepped on a plug this morning that was in his brother’s bag, he couldn’t see it underneath the pile of shite on the floor. As long as they’re happy sleeping there (obviously I’ll still change the beds each week), then they can go for it. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buchan30 Posted December 22, 2021 Share Posted December 22, 2021 I’ve basically done the same as what you are doing since day dot, but I’m fed up with it all. I cook everything, do their dishes, clean the house, their washing etc… I don’t think I’m asking much by asking them to clean round their room and make sure it isn’t a hazard; my youngest son stepped on a plug this morning that was in his brother’s bag, he couldn’t see it underneath the pile of shite on the floor. As long as they’re happy sleeping there (obviously I’ll still change the beds each week), then they can go for it.I absolutely get where you are coming from with the thought of “i’m not asking for much” it can be frustrating and they are at that age (mines as well) where doing that stuff is a hassle. Might be a good life lesson to leave it and make them realise they need to tidy up, otherwise they will be unable to find stuff etc. I have been tempted to do the same, but mrs B works nights and i would crack before they did. Although, it would maybe be worth it to see the confusion and them trying to figure out why we have no cutlery or crockery to eat stuff from and then realising it’s because it’s in their room, piled up. Would be a Life lesson, problem solving skills. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bairnardo Posted December 22, 2021 Share Posted December 22, 2021 9 minutes ago, Adam said: I’ve basically done the same as what you are doing since day dot, but I’m fed up with it all. I cook everything, do their dishes, clean the house, their washing etc… I don’t think I’m asking much by asking them to clean round their room and make sure it isn’t a hazard; my youngest son stepped on a plug this morning that was in his brother’s bag, he couldn’t see it underneath the pile of shite on the floor. As long as they’re happy sleeping there (obviously I’ll still change the beds each week), then they can go for it. Mine are too young for the messy bedroom phase, but along similar lines, I have frequent heads gones with them not listening and following basic instruction. If I repeat myself once in a day, I repeat myself over a hundred fucking times. Every. Fucking. Day. If it wasn't for the fact that the oldest one does so well at school and seems to be highly thought of, I'd think there was a problem there. Honest to fucking god man. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
parsforlife Posted December 22, 2021 Share Posted December 22, 2021 Mostly kids couldn't give a f**k about being tidy. Was with my nieces and nephews this weekend and even that seemed a bit of a battle trying to make them do simple things, 10 minute battles over taking 10 seconds to take rubbish to the bin. I was the same as a kid. By no means a clean than freak now but certainly have far higher standards than then, I have absolutely no idea what makes things click but it either will or won't. A tidy environment when their growing up(even if 99% done by someone else) is probably the main motivating factor in looking after themselves once things click in. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RH33 Posted December 23, 2021 Share Posted December 23, 2021 11 hours ago, Adam said: Does anyone else have children that are clatty wee b*****ds? My kids share a room when they’re here, and up until yesterday I would be in there every day tidying up their mess, making the beds, taking out glasses, plates, food wrappers etc… Ended up having a heads gone moment with them both yesterday over the state of their bedroom, and I’m now refusing to enter the pit, if they want to live like pigs in shit then they can fire away. I’m quite a clean freak so perhaps I am being too harsh on a 13 year old and a 10 year old, but I remember being pretty tidy, even hoovering at 10 for my Mum. They get asked to do f**k all when they’re here, but just asking them to pick up their clothes is a pure chore. As mentioned, I’m now at the stage that if they want to live like that them I’m letting them charge on. Yup. My son is expected clean up his own plates/wrappers/crusty w**k socks. In fairness when we were cleaning other day he hoovered his room himself. I have a no food in rooms rule but it's routinely ignored. I have a heads gone semi regularly at them and it helps for about a day. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
scottsdad Posted December 23, 2021 Share Posted December 23, 2021 My son keeps his fairly tidy. My daughter's room looks like the inside of a hoover bag. My step daughter was the same. She does try to clean it, but is just awful at it. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andy Dufresne Posted December 23, 2021 Share Posted December 23, 2021 11 hours ago, Adam said: Such a shame, the kids deserve better, but you are doing everything you can to give them a stable home environment, totally take my hat off to you both, they’ll be so, so grateful when they’re older. It could be that she is ashamed and worries about the reception she would get should she get in touch. Not saying it is an excuse, but if it were me I perhaps wouldn’t close the door completely to her should she get in touch in future. All we know is she is in London 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hk blues Posted December 23, 2021 Share Posted December 23, 2021 30 minutes ago, scottsdad said: She does try to clean it, but is just awful at it. Wise beyond her years 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted December 23, 2021 Share Posted December 23, 2021 1 hour ago, scottsdad said: My son keeps his fairly tidy. My daughter's room looks like the inside of a hoover bag. My step daughter was the same. She does try to clean it, but is just awful at it. When my daughter lived with us I had the idea of cloning her, should the worst ever happen, from the hair, nail clipping, make up wipes and clothes on the floor. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted December 23, 2021 Share Posted December 23, 2021 11 hours ago, scottsdad said: My son keeps his fairly tidy. My daughter's room looks like the inside of a hoover bag. My step daughter was the same. She does try to clean it, but is just awful at it. Stepdaughter Nr 3 was the same, her room was an absolute disaster, we just left her to it. Once she got her own house the transformation was remarkable, clean freak wouldn't come into it. When Jack was wee she used to play the tidy up game, seems to have worked with him, he'd keep his room fairly tidy. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Honest Saints Fan Posted December 27, 2021 Share Posted December 27, 2021 We've been at Center Parcs over Christmas. All going great until wee one had a febrile seizure yesterday afternoon. Basically started fitting and seemed to stop breathing for about a minute. Honestly thought he was a goner. Fucking scary. Another chapter to add to what our life has become since 2018 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jacksgranda Posted December 27, 2021 Share Posted December 27, 2021 Sounds horrendous, hope all is well now 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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