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So.........There was this tortoise walking along the pavement minding its own business when it was set upon by a gang of snails.

PC Plod was sent for and proceeded to take a statement from the tortoise. 

"What actually happened here" he asked. "I'm not sure, officer," the tortoise replied. "It all happened so quickly"

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I ordered a few things off of Sports Direct the other day and paid £6 to get it delivered. I was out all day yesterday at the football but my girlfriend was in and the company yodel got in touch to say my package had been delivered but it wasn't delivered here. Going to have to chase them up tomorrow but I don't understand where it can have gone to.

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I ordered a few things off of Sports Direct the other day and paid £6 to get it delivered. I was out all day yesterday at the football but my girlfriend was in and the company yodel got in touch to say my package had been delivered but it wasn't delivered here. Going to have to chase them up tomorrow but I don't understand where it can have gone to.



You do live in EH6. A Sports Direct package will be a highly sought after item.

Your creepy neighbour will be staring at you from under a Lonsdale hoodie later on.
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You do live in EH6. A Sports Direct package will be a highly sought after item.

Your creepy neighbour will be staring at you from under a Lonsdale hoodie later on.


She was at her window again yesterday and stuck her fingers up at my girlfriend and her friend. I think we're going to have to contact someone about her as it's gone far beyond a joke.
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13 minutes ago, throbber said:

 

 


She was at her window again yesterday and stuck her fingers up at my girlfriend and her friend. I think we're going to have to contact someone about her as it's gone far beyond a joke.

 

The auld coot might be deaf and she's using BSL.

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What is this woman's problem with you and Mrs Throbs and how this issue all begin?


She stays across from us and one floor higher and stares into our flat all the time. We have double doors in our sitting room and our couch is near them so she can see right in. It started off as just seeing her face and we commented on how creepy she looked but now a few months have gone by it's pretty clear she isn't right in the head and is actually harassing us.
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15 minutes ago, throbber said:

 


She stays across from us and one floor higher and stares into our flat all the time. We have double doors in our sitting room and our couch is near them so she can see right in. It started off as just seeing her face and we commented on how creepy she looked but now a few months have gone by it's pretty clear she isn't right in the head and is actually harassing us.

 

 

 

Or to look at it another way....

 

 

A lassie looks out of her window occasionally (it is what they are for), and sees a couple continually staring up at her, even though she us a floor above and they can't see in . So they aren't being nosey about furniture etc. They are looking at her !

That's creepy enough to keep checking if the couple are doing it all the time, which it seems they are.

 

 

Buy curtains ya leither.

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46 minutes ago, throbber said:

I have curtains which I occasionally like to have open m9.

I have/had (who knows the current status, I don't) a flat in EH6.

 

I know that if I opened the curtains, there was 2 invariables.

 

1/ there is NO sunshine on Leith.

2/ you are looking at Leith.

 

 

 

Nice try M1 impossible...

Edited by Njord
Auto correct made Leith 'Leigh' which is possible...
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I have/had (who knows the current status, I don't) a flat in EH6.

 

I know that if I opened the curtains, there was 2 invariables.

 

1/ there is NO sunshine on Leigh.

2/ you are looking at Leigh.

 

 

 

Nice try M1 impossible...



What an absolutely strange thing to say.
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