kiwififer Posted September 8, 2010 Share Posted September 8, 2010 We were getting new tyres for the car yesterday. I nipped over to the car to see what size they were before going in for a price at Farmers. 'Why are you going to the car?' asks my beloved. 'To see what they are' replies me. 'They're black' she says.... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Swarley Posted September 8, 2010 Share Posted September 8, 2010 We were getting new tyres for the car yesterday. I nipped over to the car to see what size they were before going in for a price at Farmers. 'Why are you going to the car?' asks my beloved. 'To see what they are' replies me. 'They're black' she says.... Stupid foreigners! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stimpy Posted September 8, 2010 Share Posted September 8, 2010 While lying in bed one morning after a nightshift, "Don't think you can lie there all day just because you've been up all night". This was years ago and I still cast it up remorselessly. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
th1stleandr0se Posted September 8, 2010 Share Posted September 8, 2010 In France, we had to get a wheel bearing replaced so, to pass the time while the car was in the garage, my wife went to the shoe supermarket next door. She came out with a stack of boxes and told me she had saved enough to pay for the car repair. If anybody needed proof that men and women think differently, this is it. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Middleton Mouse Posted September 8, 2010 Share Posted September 8, 2010 I'd like to stress that this is not my current lad but an ex. We had went to the swimming one night and upon leaving he looked through the window at the pool and remarked how still the water looked. I had fun telling him the "water" was so still because it was actually a blue cover that had been dragged over the water. -1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nkomo-A-Gogo Posted September 8, 2010 Share Posted September 8, 2010 My girlfriends car has a glove department, she thinks her granny gets subscribed pills and once when she tried to change her flat tyre she managed to snap off two of the silver plastic nuts of the wheel trim before noticing it came off. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nick_BCFC Posted September 9, 2010 Share Posted September 9, 2010 I know a girl who believed in unicorns until she was 23. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
madwullie Posted September 9, 2010 Share Posted September 9, 2010 My ex once said to me "I bet there aren't many German kids who get called Hitler anymore" - silly bint thought it was his first name. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
joemuz Posted September 9, 2010 Share Posted September 9, 2010 Watchin the Scotland game the other nite and my bird turned around to me and asked is Liechtenstein even a country!! My m8s bird once said to him that she thought that her ipod was really heavy since she had dowloaded loads of new songs haha 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
gingapar Posted September 9, 2010 Share Posted September 9, 2010 (edited) I was in the local park with the wife once, looking over the duck pond at the swans i said "they have some wingspan, you can see it when they come in to land" to which she gave me a bemused look and said "what? neheht, shut up, you taking the piss? swans can't fly". she fell out with me for ages for laughing at her. Edited September 9, 2010 by gingapar 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Middleton Mouse Posted September 9, 2010 Share Posted September 9, 2010 (edited) I know a girl who believed in unicorns until she was 23. On the same note I knew someone who didn't think that wolves were real animals (not werewolves - actual wolves). She thought that they were mythical creatures that only existed in stories. She was 19 when she admitted this. Edited September 9, 2010 by Middleton Mouse 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweet Pete Posted September 9, 2010 Share Posted September 9, 2010 (edited) I know someone who, at the age of 18, is afraid of mannequins. Christ only knows why. Supposedly the ones with no 'face' are ok, but as soon as they have eyes etc and begin to look that little bit more realistic, she goes off her nut and has to leave the place. That reminds me of Roger from American Dad: "I hope their store mannequins have nipples. But not heads" Edited September 9, 2010 by Sweet Pete 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hank Scorpio Posted September 9, 2010 Share Posted September 9, 2010 My bird: "Europe's a big country eh!?" I think I actually fell off the couch. Slept there as well -2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thepaisleypanda Posted September 9, 2010 Share Posted September 9, 2010 I came in one night to be told "I got a bargain today in Poundland - guess how much?" 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
th1stleandr0se Posted September 9, 2010 Share Posted September 9, 2010 I knew a lady who thought that islands float, this is, have water underneath them. I told this in company and another lady agreed with her. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sweet Pete Posted September 9, 2010 Share Posted September 9, 2010 My other half comes out with some stoaters (too many to remember them all, sadly) but she goes absolutely bonkers when I take the piss. Which I do, mercilessly 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Unleash The Nade Posted September 9, 2010 Share Posted September 9, 2010 Whilst attending a US trade show this year,I went on a stand with a view to gaining possible UK distributorship for a certain companys products. When I explained to the female Export Manager,that we would be looking for UK exclusivety,she asked me,"would you also be interested in other areas of Europe, Scotland for example?" 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monster Posted September 9, 2010 Share Posted September 9, 2010 A few years ago I was watching the final of the English League Cup when it was sponsored by Worthingtons. Richard Keys said: "Joining us now: Frank Worthington. Welcome Frank." Ayrgirl pipes up: "Oooooh, that's who they named that cup after...." 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ClydeNewcomer Posted September 9, 2010 Share Posted September 9, 2010 The amount of unbelievably thick and ignorant people today is amost unreal. Burds included obviously but the in general the public are dangerous ignorant. Its also by no accident. The dumbing down of the world -1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monster Posted September 9, 2010 Share Posted September 9, 2010 The amount of unbelievably thick and ignorant people today is amost unreal. Burds included obviously but the in general the public are dangerous ignorant. Its also by no accident. The dumbing down of the world Without a you tube link I'm struggling to get aboard the tinfoil hat train. Plus, you didn't use the word 'sheeples' to describe people who find your very sensible theories a little on the rum side. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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