Depression

[RH33]

Hedge, mood scope is good site for tracking mood. Might be worth doing for few weeks and seeing if any pattern emerges.

I'm having wee blip but it'll pass.

[Ad Lib]

I don't know if this will help you or not, but remember that over 1,000 people just voted for you to be their MP. That's a very very big deal

Frightening, isn't it? At least 1069 people in East Renfrewshire are absolutely crazy!

[ICTChris]

Frightening, isn't it? At least 1069 people in East Renfrewshire are absolutely crazy!

Time to end the failed democratic experiment.

Srsly tho, I'm glad you are feeling better

Edited May 22, 2015 by ICTChris

[SweeperDee]

There's literally nothing more I can do to rid myself of what seems to be an overwhelmingly intense, and prolonged feeling of loneliness.

I've tried surrounding myself with friends, been going out semi-regularly, been trying to think positively, I'm not an anti-social guy by any means; I just feel like I can't really connect to people, or more specifically, people don't seem to connect to me the same amount that I feel I connect to them.

Sitting on my laptop at this very moment, writing this out, all of my pals have went home for summer bar a select few but I'm already around at theirs most of the week and I don't want to feel like I'm bothering them.

To top it all off my grandmother is deteriorating at an alarming rate with suspected dementia. I help as much as I can, but it's just heartbreaking; this coupled with this sense of loneliness is making me feel disturbingly sad - funnily enough I've felt lonely for years, and I've said before that it's my greatest fear in life, but this pure sadness is the worst I've ever felt.

[paranoid android]

There's literally nothing more I can do to rid myself of what seems to be an overwhelmingly intense, and prolonged feeling of loneliness.

I've tried surrounding myself with friends, been going out semi-regularly, been trying to think positively, I'm not an anti-social guy by any means; I just feel like I can't really connect to people, or more specifically, people don't seem to connect to me the same amount that I feel I connect to them.

Sitting on my laptop at this very moment, writing this out, all of my pals have went home for summer bar a select few but I'm already around at theirs most of the week and I don't want to feel like I'm bothering them.

To top it all off my grandmother is deteriorating at an alarming rate with suspected dementia. I help as much as I can, but it's just heartbreaking; this coupled with this sense of loneliness is making me feel disturbingly sad - funnily enough I've felt lonely for years, and I've said before that it's my greatest fear in life, but this pure sadness is the worst I've ever felt.

It's not easy, mate - I'm a bit similar, in that I don't connect easily with people, and tend to withdraw from their company. I've now got to the stage, though, that I'm comfortable on my own - when I'm out and about, I can't wait to get home.

With the better weather looming, I'm hoping to be motivated enough to get out walking in the fresh air, and there's a lot to be said for keeping yourself busy with whatever.

I honestly don't know what the answer is, though - mind you can always ask for help.

[SweeperDee]

It's not easy, mate - I'm a bit similar, in that I don't connect easily with people, and tend to withdraw from their company. I've now got to the stage, though, that I'm comfortable on my own - when I'm out and about, I can't wait to get home.

With the better weather looming, I'm hoping to be motivated enough to get out walking in the fresh air, and there's a lot to be said for keeping yourself busy with whatever.

I honestly don't know what the answer is, though - mind you can always ask for help.

Could be post-breakup blues but I've felt this way for a while.

I try and get out of the house as much as I can, as I get extremely bored if I don't; if I'm with friends the feeling subsides a bit, but obviously when I get home or I leave their company it comes back with vengeance.

Thanks for your reply PA, means a lot.

[paranoid android]

Could be post-breakup blues but I've felt this way for a while.

I try and get out of the house as much as I can, as I get extremely bored if I don't; if I'm with friends the feeling subsides a bit, but obviously when I get home or I leave their company it comes back with vengeance.

Thanks for your reply PA, means a lot.

Apparently, some depressive episodes can occur in the aftermath of events of emotional upheaval/turmoil, etc - bad break-ups can certainly leave folk in bad places.

It's good to talk, mate, so nae bother!

[SweeperDee]

Definitely good to talk; my job involves telling people that which is ironic in some way.

I can definitely tell when I'm about to experience some sort of episode, whether it is a manic one or depressive one; almost like a spidey sense. This sadness seems to transcend my usual feelings somewhat, hopefully it will get better.

[philpy]

It's not easy, mate - I'm a bit similar, in that I don't connect easily with people, and tend to withdraw from their company. I've now got to the stage, though, that I'm comfortable on my own - when I'm out and about, I can't wait to get home.

With the better weather looming, I'm hoping to be motivated enough to get out walking in the fresh air, and there's a lot to be said for keeping yourself busy with whatever.

I honestly don't know what the answer is, though - mind you can always ask for help.

You're in dalkeith eh?? I'm just along in wallyford mate, if you ever fancy a Blether it's not a problem. I'm a good listener, and I like to try and help people in your position out.

[paranoid android]

You're in dalkeith eh?? I'm just along in wallyford mate, if you ever fancy a Blether it's not a problem. I'm a good listener, and I like to try and help people in your position out.

Cheers, man - I am in Dalkeith, for my sins. Top man!

[partick_twinny]

Ad lib, I had no idea what you were going through. Really sorry to hear you've been struggling but glad you're feeling on top of things at the moment.

My partner has been suffering with depression for ten years (I've been with her almost six). The past two years in particular have been incredibly difficult, with her attempting suicide in January last year. She's also on citalopram and it has been a great help, though she's now been switched to S-citalopram which is a more active version of the drug. The trouble for her is that she doesn't feel she deserves to get better and therefore punishes herself when things are going well by not taking her medication.

Anyway, we should meet up for a pint next time I'm at Firhill, assuming I actually get the chance next season.

[Wile E Coyote]

Frightening, isn't it? At least 1069 people in East Renfrewshire are absolutely crazy!

Sorry ad lib, gave you a reddie by mistake. Gave you a green on another post to make up for it

[The Ginger Prince]

Been offered a new job which is in a far better industry than I'm in at the moment, every weekend off & set shifts.

Fucking delighted, been feeling fucking horrific these past few weeks due to my current work situation and this has just lifted me 100%.

Cannot fucking wait to move on from this shite stage of my life and start afresh!

[Lyle Lanley]

Been offered a new job which is in a far better industry than I'm in at the moment, every weekend off & set shifts.

Fucking delighted, been feeling fucking horrific these past few weeks due to my current work situation and this has just lifted me 100%.

Cannot fucking wait to move on from this shite stage of my life and start afresh!

Great news man. Glad that's cheered you up.

I've been feeling a bit better with myself these past few days. Start work on Thursday, got a bird, got a great selection of friends and my confidence is fully back. Just nervous about telling the old folks about my bird and working on thursday.

[Raidernation]

This might sound silly or petty but.....

Tomorrow is the last (half) day of school, so I will be off until the end of August. Now this might sound wonderful, but (I) I don't get paid and (ii) I love my job. I'm dreading what the hell I'm going to do for 3 months and it's making me feel very down right now.

[South Lanarkshire Jag]

I'm having a bit of a "downer" week, where I just seem to attempt to kamikaze everything good in my life and destroy it.

It may be petty, but I'm just having one of those weeks that I just seem to go from disaster to crisis and there is no middle land in between. I have allowed my mind to go to some pretty dark places but those are just fleeting thoughts in my daily routine.

I'm hosting the SPLStats quiz tomorrow night, while I have the Scottish Cup Final and Motherwell v Rangers to look forward to at the weekend but, in truth, I'm just looking forward to doing absolutely nothing next Monday.

I know this post appears petty, especially in relation to what others have written, but I felt it would be good to write down how I feel, even if nobody reads it.

[bobbykdy]

I'm having a bit of a "downer" week, where I just seem to attempt to kamikaze everything good in my life and destroy it.

It may be petty, but I'm just having one of those weeks that I just seem to go from disaster to crisis and there is no middle land in between. I have allowed my mind to go to some pretty dark places but those are just fleeting thoughts in my daily routine.

I'm hosting the SPLStats quiz tomorrow night, while I have the Scottish Cup Final and Motherwell v Rangers to look forward to at the weekend but, in truth, I'm just looking forward to doing absolutely nothing next Monday.

I know this post appears petty, especially in relation to what others have written, but I felt it would be good to write down how I feel, even if nobody reads it.

Not petty really, they do say failure to look forward to things or no longer finding things enjoyable you normally do is a sign of depression.

I can relate to the bit as well about looking forward to doing nothing, I think this is as much to do with not being arsed with people and not wanting to make idle chat as anything, certainly is in my case anyway.

[Mr Bairn]

It feels bizarre to be posting in this thread just a few short hours before setting off for Hampden to see my team hopefully lift the Scottish cup, but we have no say in when this horrible illness will take its toll on us.

I finished 3rd year of uni three weeks ago, and for the most recent two-and-a-half weeks, I've been back staying in Airdrie, the place where I was brought up. I was a bit of a loner in school, I wasn't badly bullied, although I did tend to get excluded from most things by folk my age. As a result I spent large chunks of my teenage years trying to summon up the courage to end it all, but thankfully, never managed. I was always pretty academic and just thought if I could get good grades and go to uni it would be a fresh start.

And it was when I went to Edinburgh Uni in 2012. Moving to the capital was the best thing that's ever happened to me, I now have a wide and varied social life, am not as badly affected by depression as I once was and am generally happy with the person I am. However in recent days the realisation has dawned on me that I only have a year left at uni, and this time next year I could be back to square one, because I might have to move to a new city alone, and this time I won't have the crutch of student life to help me meet folk. I dread to think what will happen.

It doesn't help that my dad is really fucking pissing me off right now. We were never really close when I was growing up but have become best friends since I went to uni (my mum is the opposite, we were very close when I was growing up but she really annoys me now) however lately he's just been trying to oppose me in everything I do. He had a bizarre pop at me for supporting Motherwell last night, and the thing that's really wound me up tonight is how passive he seems about the game tomorrow. He was the man that took me to the games growing up and introduced me to football, and we're going together again tomorrow, but it seems like he just doesn't give a shit one way or the other whether we win or lose and that's really fucking riled me up.

Anyway, sorry about my musings but hopefully somebody will listen. I guess I could just use someone to talk it out with at the moment.

[South Lanarkshire Jag]

And it was when I went to Edinburgh Uni in 2012. Moving to the capital was the best thing that's ever happened to me, I now have a wide and varied social life, am not as badly affected by depression as I once was and am generally happy with the person I am. However in recent days the realisation has dawned on me that I only have a year left at uni, and this time next year I could be back to square one, because I might have to move to a new city alone, and this time I won't have the crutch of student life to help me meet folk. I dread to think what will happen.

I can't really relate/help much with the family difficulties, although I too think my mother is an arse. I grew closer to my dad but our personality clashed far too much to be "mates"

I can, however, understand your anxiety over moving to a new city all alone. While I have never had a permanent home in a totally isolated city, I have some experience of it through interrailing in 2010. While everything at the start went smoothingly I arrived in Liege(Stop 3 or 4), got off the train and looked for travel information. I couldn't find it for 2 hours so basically broke down(tears and thait) on a bench outside while telling a pigeon to f**k off when it dared walk near me. After composing myself I went back in and found travel information, found my hostel and walked there.

My point is, presumably you will be visiting the city for your job. I'd definitely recommending finding a local pub/cafe that means you have somewhere to focus on when you move. If all you know is your job, house and some sort of social environment(said pub/cafe) then you'll get to know people eventually through simply asking "do you know where the nearest TESCO is?". The worst people can say is f**k off.

If you won't be visiting the city prior to job, then just make a personal pledge to make one friend on your second day. It pushes you out your comfort zone in an emergency.

[underdogunderdog underdog]

It certainly becomes harder to make friends as you get older.

I moved to a new place a few years ago after getting married. It's a big difference from what I was used to. I used to socialise a fair bit with my friends as a lot of us stayed near each other. I used to have weekends off too which was easier.

Since getting married, I went back to studying so went from working full time to part time. Along with moving, it means I don't see much of my friends at all. I'm just hoping that getting my degree will be worth the sacrifices over last few years.

Unfortunately I still don't really have any friends in local area. I've mentioned to a couple folk about going out for drinks but it is always me suggesting it and feels one way at times. I have people at work that I get on pretty well so sometimes go out with them.