Bobby Skidmarks Posted October 8, 2019 Share Posted October 8, 2019 5 hours ago, Snafu said: Again the railway bridge across Thornbush Road, Inverness yesterday bags another victim. Not sure where this is, take that left and Grant Street Park home of Clachnacuddin is right in front of you. https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-highlands-islands-49959941 Fun fact, I once fingered a girl around the first corner on your left after I went to see a gig in the Clach Club in about 1997. Not sure if this had anything to do with the crash though. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hearthammer Posted October 8, 2019 Share Posted October 8, 2019 12 minutes ago, Bobby Skidmarks said: Fun fact, I once fingered a girl around the first corner on your left after I went to see a gig in the Clach Club in about 1997. Not sure if this had anything to do with the crash though. Maybe the driver of the lorry saw the poor traumatised lassie still there and, like you at the time, lost control of his load. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted October 9, 2019 Share Posted October 9, 2019 16 hours ago, Bobby Skidmarks said: Fun fact, I once fingered a girl around the first corner on your left after I went to see a gig in the Clach Club in about 1997. Not sure if this had anything to do with the crash though. An honour to have you here, Mr. President. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HeWhoWalksBehindTheRows Posted October 9, 2019 Share Posted October 9, 2019 On 21/09/2019 at 22:10, Shandon Par said: I only like ketchup with a lorne not a link. You're on a roll with these puns 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hearthammer Posted October 9, 2019 Share Posted October 9, 2019 9 minutes ago, HeWhoWalksBehindTheRows said: You're on a roll with these puns You're just barmy !!!! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sergeant Wilson Posted October 9, 2019 Share Posted October 9, 2019 17 hours ago, Bobby Skidmarks said: Fun fact, I once fingered a girl around the first corner on your left after I went to see a gig in the Clach Club in about 1997. Not sure if this had anything to do with the crash though. Maybe the driver swerved when he saw her ghost. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bairnardo Posted October 9, 2019 Share Posted October 9, 2019 Maybe the driver swerved when he saw her ghost. How big are his fingers ffs? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AFCDannyFTH Posted October 9, 2019 Share Posted October 9, 2019 https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-49982237 $8bn and a new set of tits. Guy hit the jackpot. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hearthammer Posted October 9, 2019 Share Posted October 9, 2019 Woman Eats Jesus !!!! Wonder if she'll bring him back up after 3 days ?? https://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/glasgow-mum-eats-jesus-after-20540757 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted October 9, 2019 Share Posted October 9, 2019 (edited) 3 hours ago, hearthammer said: Woman Eats Jesus !!!! Wonder if she'll bring him back up after 3 days ?? https://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/glasgow-mum-eats-jesus-after-20540757 Why is it always Jesus that these fruitcakes see? Just a vague image of a guy with a beard - could be Gandalf. My favourite story along these lines was when a faint image of "Jesus" appeared on the outside wall of a cafe in Mexico. Every time it rained, the image became clearer, until finally somebody realised it was a poster for a Willie Nelson concert that had been whitewashed over. Edited October 9, 2019 by GordonD 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Master Posted October 11, 2019 Share Posted October 11, 2019 It’s all going down in Lochee. https://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/fp/bitter-split-in-dundee-community-could-mean-two-santas-grottos-are-set-up/ Quote “I have no idea how we could explain away two Santa Clauses to the children. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Connolly Posted October 11, 2019 Share Posted October 11, 2019 He's a fat bloke who can carry tonnes on a wee wooden sleigh led by flying reindeer. He can also get down the chimney of houses that don't actually have a chimney. He's not magical enough to be in two places at once though, and Lochee is definitely the only place in the world that he hangs out in the lead up to Christmas. Those poor children. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mathematics Posted October 11, 2019 Share Posted October 11, 2019 On 09/10/2019 at 15:22, GordonD said: Why is it always Jesus that these fruitcakes see? Just a vague image of a guy with a beard - could be Gandalf. My favourite story along these lines was when a faint image of "Jesus" appeared on the outside wall of a cafe in Mexico. Every time it rained, the image became clearer, until finally somebody realised it was a poster for a Willie Nelson concert that had been whitewashed over. My favourite story along these lines was when the image of a bishop appeared on a skirting board in the parochial house of an island off the cost of Ireland. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Connolly Posted October 11, 2019 Share Posted October 11, 2019 11 minutes ago, mathematics said: My favourite story along these lines was when the image of a bishop appeared on a skirting board in the parochial house of an island off the cost of Ireland. I liked the one where the Virgin Mary appeared as water damage in a scummy pub in Philadelphia. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NJ2 Posted October 11, 2019 Share Posted October 11, 2019 “I have no idea how we could explain away two Santa Clauses to the children. This feels like it should be a punchline for a David Kay joke. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted October 11, 2019 Share Posted October 11, 2019 8 hours ago, mathematics said: My favourite story along these lines was when the image of a bishop appeared on a skirting board in the parochial house of an island off the cost of Ireland. That one was never proved - the person sent to investigate suffered a mysterious injury and was in a state of shock for weeks. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Joey Jo Jo Junior Shabadoo Posted October 11, 2019 Share Posted October 11, 2019 On 09/10/2019 at 15:22, GordonD said: Why is it always Jesus that these fruitcakes see? Just a vague image of a guy with a beard - could be Gandalf. My favourite story along these lines was when a faint image of "Jesus" appeared on the outside wall of a cafe in Mexico. Every time it rained, the image became clearer, until finally somebody realised it was a poster for a Willie Nelson concert that had been whitewashed over. Former Motherwell Superstar Brian Martin found an image of Jimmy Hill burnt onto the bottom of his iron. Also a guy with a beard. Spooky. Fact courtesy of The Sun circa 2000. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
coprolite Posted October 11, 2019 Share Posted October 11, 2019 (edited) 11 hours ago, The Master said: It’s all going down in Lochee. https://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/fp/bitter-split-in-dundee-community-could-mean-two-santas-grottos-are-set-up/ This sort of thing does my nut in. I get that there are two Santa's, so each has a grotto, but there are two, so surely the apostrophe goes after the "s"? Edited October 11, 2019 by coprolite I took great care not to apostrophise my plural, but autocorrect did it anyway. Now I look like a stupid c**t instead of just a c**t. Thanks autocorrect, you dick 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted October 12, 2019 Share Posted October 12, 2019 https://www.edinburghnews.scotsman.com/news/traffic-and-travel/exhausted-edinburgh-residents-pelt-late-night-roadworks-crew-baked-beans-and-haggis-806078?fbclid=IwAR1VWfezlvQ90Pe1km0eKRJD25ZwgofrDfnd3S11PAE1pFpxNxMmbw9NGtM 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shandon Par Posted October 15, 2019 Share Posted October 15, 2019 I don't think this Glasgow tanning salon used Saatchi & Saatchi for its advertising campaign.. https://www.eveningtimes.co.uk/news/17968665.glasgow-tanning-salon-slammed-racist-golliwog-posts/ 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.