fuzzydunlop Posted April 25, 2019 Share Posted April 25, 2019 Oh yeah another one…. About a year after the day trip event , the Director came to me with an ‘Employee of the Month’ scheme where someone would get a token £25 for doing the best in various areas. Initially I felt a bit lousy about it due to the relatively low amount but due to company policy getting any sort of reward was something. So for the first month I concocted this elaborate points system to prove that a certain person was employee of the month so it could be seen in black and white. I knew I couldn’t just give it someone that I ‘perceived’ to be employee of the month as it would cause folk to moan so I took ages making sure the figures stacked up. Typical call centre type b*llshit. Number of calls taken, lateness, etc. After awarding the first month to one of the girls who rightly deserved it, I happened to go out the room after announcing it. In my absence I found out that these two tw*ts started dissecting all the results, right in front of this girl who had won the £25 to try and prove I’d somehow got it wrong. It was £25 ffs! I was told afterwards and was f*cking livid. So much so I decided to that I couldn’t be ars*d with the whole thing and it wouldn’t be happening again. Told the Director why and he agreed. Felt a bit bad for the other folk in the team in hindsight. The irony of it was I’d decided in my head that I would fix it so each month so everyone would get a month where they won it as I didn’t think people would scrutinise it after a few months especially for the sake of £25 I didn’t think people would be so bothered! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stellaboz Posted April 25, 2019 Share Posted April 25, 2019 People are scum. Should instead have an anti bonus system where someone gets fined each month. That'll give them something to really worry over. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JamesP_81 Posted April 25, 2019 Share Posted April 25, 2019 Oh yeah another one…. About a year after the day trip event , the Director came to me with an ‘Employee of the Month’ scheme where someone would get a token £25 for doing the best in various areas. Initially I felt a bit lousy about it due to the relatively low amount but due to company policy getting any sort of reward was something. So for the first month I concocted this elaborate points system to prove that a certain person was employee of the month so it could be seen in black and white. I knew I couldn’t just give it someone that I ‘perceived’ to be employee of the month as it would cause folk to moan so I took ages making sure the figures stacked up. Typical call centre type b*llshit. Number of calls taken, lateness, etc. After awarding the first month to one of the girls who rightly deserved it, I happened to go out the room after announcing it. In my absence I found out that these two tw*ts started dissecting all the results, right in front of this girl who had won the £25 to try and prove I’d somehow got it wrong. It was £25 ffs! I was told afterwards and was f*cking livid. So much so I decided to that I couldn’t be ars*d with the whole thing and it wouldn’t be happening again. Told the Director why and he agreed. Felt a bit bad for the other folk in the team in hindsight. The irony of it was I’d decided in my head that I would fix it so each month so everyone would get a month where they won it as I didn’t think people would scrutinise it after a few months especially for the sake of £25 I didn’t think people would be so bothered! There have been so many posts on here about the shiteness of call centre working but I think this one sums it up perfectly. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheScarf Posted April 25, 2019 Share Posted April 25, 2019 4 hours ago, Bairnardo said: I love it when folk trot out the "Wouldnt you be bored" patter. Absolute fucking drones. 'Aye mate, I've got enough money to go anywhere in the world for as long as I like, I'm bored oot ma nut here' 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DA Baracus Posted April 25, 2019 Share Posted April 25, 2019 4 hours ago, Bairnardo said: I love it when folk trot out the "Wouldnt you be bored" patter. Absolute fucking drones. There's a lad in my work (same one I've mentioned in the Indy Ref 2 thread) who says this. He also asks what I would do, to which I reply "Whatever I want." If I won I wouldn't be working ever again. I'd walk in and tell them (when I got up, and not in the morning) and let them know what's outstanding, and would probably get something like doughnuts for the office as most folk in the office are sound, but I wouldn't be working any notice period (and fortunately my job is easy and can be picked up pretty quickly, and I've written out a procedure for everything last summer as well). 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dons_1988 Posted April 25, 2019 Share Posted April 25, 2019 Against the grain here, I would obviously quit my job but I wouldn't give up working forever. I'd start my own charity or business etc, f**k just doing nothing for the rest of my life. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Derry Alli Posted April 25, 2019 Share Posted April 25, 2019 8 minutes ago, Dons_1988 said: Against the grain here, I would obviously quit my job but I wouldn't give up working forever. I'd start my own charity or business etc, f**k just doing nothing for the rest of my life. I'd open a couple pubs, most likely. It might be pissing your money away (I'd probably set a limit on what I could lose a year) but it's something I've always wanted to do. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dons_1988 Posted April 25, 2019 Share Posted April 25, 2019 14 minutes ago, Dele said: I'd open a couple pubs, most likely. It might be pissing your money away (I'd probably set a limit on what I could lose a year) but it's something I've always wanted to do. Indeed. Invest the right amount of money so that you have enough left over that you don't need it to be financially successful and it going bust wouldn't hurt you. I would also like to open a bar or something in a sunny climate. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stellaboz Posted April 25, 2019 Share Posted April 25, 2019 Start a football club in somewhere like Pitlochry, or Crainlarich and take them up through the pyramid, paying a bunch of guys stupid wages and secret envelopes of caah under the desk, to the anger and jealousy of everyone. Then when it all got boring, let them fly to the wind.Maybe I'd buy Sevco and instantly liquidate this new club, own all the name rights and hold them so that there wouldn't be a "Rangers". 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GordonD Posted April 25, 2019 Share Posted April 25, 2019 29 minutes ago, Stellaboz said: Maybe I'd buy Sevco and instantly liquidate this new club, own all the name rights and hold them so that there wouldn't be a "Rangers". Keep your fingers crossed that those three numbers come up this weekend! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RGV Posted April 25, 2019 Share Posted April 25, 2019 I used to work with someone who swore blind that Top Gear was totally spontaneous and not one bit scripted. I asked how that could be with things like the races they have when it all has to be filmed, edited etc. but no, he wouldn't have it. And yes, he was a dick. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dons_1988 Posted April 25, 2019 Share Posted April 25, 2019 16 minutes ago, RGV said: I used to work with someone who swore blind that Top Gear was totally spontaneous and not one bit scripted. I asked how that could be with things like the races they have when it all has to be filmed, edited etc. but no, he wouldn't have it. And yes, he was a dick. People who are staunch top gear are invariably arseholes. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stellaboz Posted April 25, 2019 Share Posted April 25, 2019 People who are staunch top gear are invariably arseholes.I used to love Top Gear as entertainment, the challenges were a lot of fun but deary me, that guy sounds like he sticks his knob in exhaust pipes (no euph) 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RGV Posted April 25, 2019 Share Posted April 25, 2019 2 minutes ago, Dons_1988 said: People who are staunch top gear are invariably arseholes. I honestly thought he was taking the piss until I saw he was getting riled when I was asking him all these questions. I imagine he's got a space in his freezer looked out for me and went home to sharpen his axe. He'd be one of those twats standing in the audience with a vacant look on his face and laughing at everything those three c***s said. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RGV Posted April 25, 2019 Share Posted April 25, 2019 1 minute ago, Stellaboz said: 7 minutes ago, Dons_1988 said: People who are staunch top gear are invariably arseholes. I used to love Top Gear as entertainment, the challenges were a lot of fun but deary me, that guy sounds like he sticks his knob in exhaust pipes (no euph) I tried explaining that the challenges/races couldn't be genuine as the shots with the cars flying past have all to be set up in advance but no, not a fucking hope, totally away with the fairies. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheScarf Posted April 25, 2019 Share Posted April 25, 2019 6 minutes ago, Estragon is a fud said: It's the male equivalent of girls who are into horses and Disney. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TheScarf Posted April 25, 2019 Share Posted April 25, 2019 But yes, males who are into cars and hate football are exclusively utter weirdos. 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nsr Posted April 25, 2019 Share Posted April 25, 2019 10 minutes ago, Estragon is a fud said: It's the male equivalent of girls who are into horses and Disney. As in something it's OK for kids to be fanatical about but people over 12 should have grown out of it by now? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WeAreElgin Posted April 25, 2019 Share Posted April 25, 2019 As in something it's OK for kids to be fanatical about but people over 12 should have grown out of it by now?It's completely pointless. Getting a hard on over their car's horsepower as if they do anything other than drive for 40 minutes down the motorway at the national speed limit every day. f**k off. Weird c***s. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RGV Posted April 25, 2019 Share Posted April 25, 2019 2 minutes ago, WeAreElgin said: 12 minutes ago, nsr said: As in something it's OK for kids to be fanatical about but people over 12 should have grown out of it by now? It's completely pointless. Getting a hard on over their car's horsepower as if they do anything other than drive for 40 minutes down the motorway at the national speed limit every day. f**k off. Weird c***s. And all the fuckwits can't see past Clarkson either, they honestly seem to think he's some sort of profound, man of the people. Just an obnoxious dick who only got away with shit anyone else would have been sacked for long ago because the show was so popular. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.