c***s in shops

[DA Baracus]

Folk who take trolleys in to the self service tills. Self service tills that can't handle my bag and require an assistant to sort the till before I start scanning.

Lazy minks who decide they don't want something but instead of putting it back where they got it decide to just dump it on the nearest shelf, or even worse, in a freezer.

People who take something off a shelf to read the packaging but take ages to do so, meaning they're blocking that shelf. Even worse if its a fridge with a door.

The fact that people are such dreadful, petty, tight scum that supermarkets have had to put security tags on their baskets as folk were stealing them instead of paying 5p for a bag.

Folk who greet about paying for a bag. It's 5p.

[Miguel Sanchez]

Handy tip for anyone moaning about using their own bags on self-service:

The scales where you put your scanned shopping are there to see if the weight of what you've scanned is accurate. So it knows that you've scanned something that has the correct label, rather than trying to pass a bottle of vodka off as water or something. The result is that it flags up a problem if there is something wrong with the scales. While they aren't sensitive enough that ~10 grams here or there will set it off, if you put down a heavy bag, or multiple bags, the machine will require verification. IT IS SUPPOSED TO DO THIS. If you're putting down one of those rucksacks people normally trek through the rainforest with rather than a sensible bag for life the machine will need to be told the bag is there. Unavoidable. Get used to it and understand this extremely basic principle about what you're using because you can't be faced with the possibility of talking to someone for twenty cunting seconds.

If you put down a huge bag for two items rather than scanning, paying and then packing - especially when your bag keeps moving because it's too heavy and unsuitable to be put in the machine - you deserve whatever impotent sense of frustration you get from using it. Then again you probably can't tie your own shoelaces, so maybe it's not your fault. Try paying attention to what you're doing and it might help.

[KnightswoodBear]

2 minutes ago, Miguel Sanchez said:

Handy tip for anyone moaning about using their own bags on self-service:

The scales where you put your scanned shopping are there to see if the weight of what you've scanned is accurate. So it knows that you've scanned something that has the correct label, rather than trying to pass a bottle of vodka off as water or something. The result is that it flags up a problem if there is something wrong with the scales. While they aren't sensitive enough that ~10 grams here or there will set it off, if you put down a heavy bag, or multiple bags, the machine will require verification. IT IS SUPPOSED TO DO THIS. If you're putting down one of those rucksacks people normally trek through the rainforest with rather than a sensible bag for life the machine will need to be told the bag is there. Unavoidable. Get used to it and understand this extremely basic principle about what you're using because you can't be faced with the possibility of talking to someone for twenty cunting seconds.

If you put down a huge bag for two items rather than scanning, paying and then packing - especially when your bag keeps moving because it's too heavy and unsuitable to be put in the machine - you deserve whatever impotent sense of frustration you get from using it. Then again you probably can't tie your own shoelaces, so maybe it's not your fault. Try paying attention to what you're doing and it might help.

If you love the self scan machines so much, why don't you just f**k off and marry one?

c***s are having a fucking good grumble here. 

[Miguel Sanchez]

Just now, KnightswoodBear said:

If you love the self scan machines so much, why don't you just f**k off and marry one?

c***s are having a fucking good grumble here. 

While self-service machines can malfunction, a majority of the problems are caused by the people using them.

[John MacLean]

3 hours ago, MONKMAN said:

Asda is 100% the premier choice supermarket for scum.

With the Asda in Parkhead Forge the flagship in the empire in that regard.  

 

 

[KnightswoodBear]

Just now, Miguel Sanchez said:

While self-service machines can malfunction, a majority of the problems are caused by the people using them.

Take your "facts" and "sensible arguments" and do one, Mr Asda.

[Granny Danger]

4 minutes ago, KnightswoodBear said:

If you love the self scan machines so much, why don't you just f**k off and marry one?

c***s are having a fucking good grumble here. 

I wouldn't want to marry a self scan machine, they can be very judgmental.

3 minutes ago, Miguel Sanchez said:

While self-service machines can malfunction, a majority of the problems are caused by the people using them.

See "it's all your fault" typical.

[Ya Bezzer!]

Asda self service machines are trash.  Sainsburys self service machines actually work.  I don't really go to other supermarkets but since Tesco is shit generally I'd not have confidence in their machines.

[Cerberus]

My biggest annoyance about self serve checkouts is the shop employee who's either slow as f**k or not even there to put the code when I do get an error.

'That's what you are there for. Move it.'

[ICTChris]

I went into the Scot-Mid on Dalry Road the other week and the self-service machines in there have a little conveyor belt to take your coins.  It made me happy, until I remembered I was in Scot-Mid on Dalry Road.

[Miguel Sanchez]

Just now, ICTChris said:

I went into the Scot-Mid on Dalry Road the other week and the self-service machines in there have a little conveyor belt to take your coins.  It made me happy, until I remembered I was in Scot-Mid on Dalry Road.

I used one like that in a Morrisons once and it felt like I was in Soviet Belarus. Harrowing.

[lionel hutz]

Lidl staff not giving you a chance to get you items together and cause a bottleneck for everyone else - and for not having enough tills at the checkout.

The wee shitey Plastic bags they give you that fucking hurt your hands to carry - like getting rope burn!

Tesco putting Costa's in their stores - but putting them in the furthest away place to the fucking entrance/exit.

Tesco ditching 5p bags - and foregoing the money going to Charity to make you buy a 10p bag for Life that the 10p goes straight to Tesco.

Charging folk £1 or even £2  to use a trolley - If I'm doing a shop that big - I;m gonna be paying by card - so why would I have an old Pound Coin on me?

Does my nut in!

[Shandon Par]

29 minutes ago, ICTChris said:

I went into the Scot-Mid on Dalry Road the other week and the self-service machines in there have a little conveyor belt to take your coins.  It made me happy, until I remembered I was in Scot-Mid on Dalry Road.

I got the wrong change out of one of those machines. It was only a few pence too much but I thought "How very Gorgie" a till that can't count. 

[Shandon Par]

Gets on my nerves when in a supermarket late/early and the only option is the self service. It's like having butler service the staff have to come over so often to authorise this and that, override complaints by the till about not putting stuff in the bagging area. 

[John Lambies Doos]

Slight deviation... but having to fukin present your boarding pass at every c**t of an airport shop; regardless of newspaper, sandwich etc

[Jacksgranda]

2 minutes ago, John Lambies Doos said:

Slight deviation... but having to fukin present your boarding pass at every c**t of an airport shop; regardless of newspaper, sandwich etc

That's "c**tin shops", not "c**ts in shops".

[The Moonster]

Standing at self service check out waiting for one to come available. Old wifey in front of me goes to one which is a card only one. She scans her first item and the machine says "this is a card only check-out, do you wish to continue?". Wifey clicks "Yes" and continues scanning. Wifey gets to the end and pulls out a £20 note and can't understand why the machine won't accept it. She stands looking over at the very busy staff looking for assistance. Staff come over and tell her that she's used a card only machine and can't pay with cash, employee then turns round and points out that a cash machine has just come available. Wifey cancels entire shop and starts throwing it into the basket whilst the employee goes over and holds the cash check-out for her. Wifey starts all over again. I stand there with my head detached from my shoulders.

2 minutes ago, John Lambies Doos said:

Slight deviation... but having to fukin present your boarding pass at every c**t of an airport shop; regardless of newspaper, sandwich etc

Tell them you don't have it on you, they only do that so they can claim VAT back. I believe you only need to show it in duty free.

[pub car king]

Morrisons used to have the worst fucking self serve machines they were fucking useless. Thankfully they've seen sense and got the same ones as every other fucker.

 

This is more clothes shop behaviour but you get swarmed by loads of the cheery fuckers when you walk in but if you need their assistance or ask a question they are fucking useless.

[pub car king]

Tell the airport c***s to f**k off 

[doulikefish]

Every shop in Edinburgh in the month of august is c**t central