Fullerene Posted December 30, 2017 Share Posted December 30, 2017 Around this time people make New Year's resolutions such as stop smoking, drink less alcohol, do more exercise, learn to dance or whatever, and less than a week later they have totally given up. This time, I would suggest resolutions that are a lot easier and therefore more likely to succeed. I would suggest 1. I will not (knowingly) grow rhododendrons in my garden. 2. I will not buy a Rangers scarf or a Celtic strip. 3. I will not swim with sharks. 4. I will not walk across a minefield. 5. I will not hug Donald Trump. 6. I will not travel faster than the speed of light. 7. I will not make more resolutions than this. Does anybody else have easy resolutions to make? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Buzz Killington Posted December 30, 2017 Share Posted December 30, 2017 Breathe at least once a day Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skerla Posted December 30, 2017 Share Posted December 30, 2017 I will not start shite threads. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tamthebam Posted December 30, 2017 Share Posted December 30, 2017 I will not attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lichtgilphead Posted December 31, 2017 Share Posted December 31, 2017 Stop responding to Oaksoft's posts. You know it makes sense. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The DA Posted December 31, 2017 Share Posted December 31, 2017 59 minutes ago, throbber said: I will not bathe with my father in law. That resolution is in keeping with your profile picture. Is it a double-bluff and you really are Alan Bennett? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tree house tam Posted December 31, 2017 Share Posted December 31, 2017 1 hour ago, throbber said: I will not bathe with my father in law. Lies. You'll all be in that paddling pool when mini throbber arrives. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The DA Posted December 31, 2017 Share Posted December 31, 2017 2 hours ago, throbber said: I genuinely dreamt I was in the bath with my father in law last night. Looks like you might have some fences to mend with your FIL. http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/entry/dreams-about-bathing_n_891614 http://www.dreammean.com/f/father-in-law Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Flybhoy Posted December 31, 2017 Share Posted December 31, 2017 Masturbate regularly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bobby Skidmarks Posted December 31, 2017 Share Posted December 31, 2017 5 hours ago, throbber said: I will not bathe with my father in law. 4 hours ago, throbber said: I genuinely dreamt I was in the bath with my father in law last night. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
liam_barnett Posted December 31, 2017 Share Posted December 31, 2017 Don't know about resolutions but a happy New Year to all when it arrives! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
buchan30 Posted December 31, 2017 Share Posted December 31, 2017 Swear less. I have sworn a lot more in the last year than i have in the last ten. Run 5k without stopping. Both achievable within the timeframe of a year, both easily breakable by january 2nd as well Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted December 31, 2017 Share Posted December 31, 2017 6 hours ago, throbber said: I genuinely dreamt I was in the bath with my father in law last night. Did you give him a soapy w**k? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted December 31, 2017 Share Posted December 31, 2017 18 minutes ago, throbber said: No, we were just sat in it watching football and having a beer and chatting about normal things. Was a really odd thing to dream about. Do you have a TV in your bathroom? I think you mentioned watching paedophile videos from it before. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted December 31, 2017 Share Posted December 31, 2017 5 minutes ago, throbber said: No, I just take the iPad in and put it on the sisters and watch YouTube or Netflix. Do they hold it between them for you? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PB 4.2 Posted December 31, 2017 Share Posted December 31, 2017 30 minutes ago, throbber said: No, I just take the iPad in and put it on the sisters and watch YouTube or Netflix. Can we get a picture of yer sister and so we can be cruel? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
welshbairn Posted December 31, 2017 Share Posted December 31, 2017 4 minutes ago, PB 4.2 said: Can we get a picture of yer sister and so we can be cruel? He could get a 40" telly on there, probably. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjc Posted December 31, 2017 Share Posted December 31, 2017 Is Throbber still going on about this birthing pool? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sjc Posted December 31, 2017 Share Posted December 31, 2017 3 minutes ago, throbber said: I got warned by the mods to rein that idea in a bit. Rightly so. We all needed gas & air after reading that! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The DA Posted December 31, 2017 Share Posted December 31, 2017 1 hour ago, throbber said: I meant so say cistern. I have been drinking. The bathwater, I take it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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