tamthebam

I saw this chap on the Union Canal near Broxburn a fortnight ago

I'm bringing down the UK public sector from the inside but so far North Korea have been late with the payments...

A pal's dug Name: Lily Likes: Sticks. Chasing sticks. Biting sticks. Breaking sticks in half by biting them. Making you look for another bloody stick

Maybe Livingston could lend a few players to their neighbours in Deans next year if they were keen for them to get East of Scotland League experience...

You reckon? I don't.

Land in Edinburgh is expensive and likely to have a hotel or student halls built on it. The ordinary Edinburgher doesn't get a look in now in Scotland's Disneyland. Decent facilities for native Edinburgh people?! Ha! Try buying an affordable house on the average Scottish wage and you'll find why a lot of ex-Edinburgh people are travelling into work from Fife and East, Mid and West Lothian now. The debacle regarding banning the Ultras for making too much noise also doesn't fill me with confidence that any other football ground wouldn't be subject to petitions from greeting faced busybodies. The Council don't like noise unless it's a concert at the Castle or a Festival Fringe event. If a rich and particularly benevolent billionaire whose favourite colours are black and white is out there then I'd build something at Shawfair as there's a station there and it's quite handy for coming off the by-pass and there's a big housing estate planned there. Saughton Enclosure could conceivably be converted into a fairly decent wee ground too (even better if you rip up the running track there on the grounds that there's a perfectly good one at Meadowbank so f*ck off you twatty athletes)

It's got me Sam Foxed anyway

I was pondering the question of whether there might be a Scottish Parliament election and the likely outcome. Labour may win most seats but the nature of the PR system means they would likely go into coalition. Labour-SNP: Highly unlikely Labour-Tory: Unlikely Labour-Green: Unlikely A grand Unionist coalition- Lib Dem-Labour-Tory is also unlikely (although Labour are quite happy to do deals like that in local Government). Which leaves the prospect of a Labour minority government held up by Tory and Lib Dem votes or the Lib Dems going into coalition as previously happened and the very talented and lovely Mr Cole-Hamilton getting a ministerial post to suit his abilities (the Ministry of Paperclips). Great.

In one country they drink Um Bongo and the other they drink Um Booanda.

Vote of Confidence? I don't have any confidence in Anus Sarwar and Jackie the Hutt's ability to run Scotland

I've heard of Lucy Pinder but am not sure who she is. Do you have any photographic proof...

Sounds like a Celtic pub that. Don't you mean The Hoppy, formerly known as The Hop, Step and Jump?

I rather suspect the distance from a front row seat to the pitch is the same, if not less, than the distance from a front row seat to the pitch at a Queen's Park match. But, yes, it's shite.

Considering Broxburn have at least 3 BAME players in their squad if someone uttered these remarks they should be banned forthwith from Albyn Park, the stupid racists.

Is the season not over yet? My first away game was Stirling Albion v Meadowbank in May 1987. There were 6 foot high nettles growing out of the urinals and there was sleet in the first half over us in the open terracing. Swapped ends at half time and the sun came out when we were in the covered terrace. Going for a pee in front of 6 foot high nettles is probably marginally more pleasurable than going to Saturday's game.. Stirling Albion won 3-1 too which is a likely score prediction for Saturday.

I went to Stuttgart 30 years ago. I thought it was quite a nice city. The Art Gallery was decent from what I remember. We visited this nearby castle which is called Lichtenstein Castle (it ain't in Lichtenstein). There's a light.. over at the Frankenstein place...

Duns 5th goal (or thereabouts) Duns 5 Earlston Rhymers 3 A wee venture into the unreal world of the Borders Amateur League tonight. I was at Duns first game as an East of Scotland club (they played down the road at the High School) and saw an East of Scotland game against Hawick here at New Hawthorn Park. The Dingers have since gone back to the Borders Amateurs although there is now a nice small stand here since my last visit (the seats came from Stoke City apparently). Earlston isn't too far from Duns as I remember so I'm not sure if this counts as a derby match or not (Chirnside are probably the local rivals). It was a pretty decent spectacle with plenty of goals and worth the contribution I gave to the club (no official admission fee). Pie wasn't too bad either..

All I want for Christmas is a Hardwicke.... ...away kit.

We have signed a couple of players from a recent opponent on pre-contract

Carrots used to be a purple colour but the Dutch bred them to be orange to celebrate their royal family. Carrots. Staunch vegetables.

He was also a sub at Hampden, came on, scored a good goal to be fair, and was later subbed.

It may interest you to know that one of the first football games I went to was at Easter Road. An old chap queued at the pie stall in front of us on the East terrace. He bought a pie, took one bite and threw it away saying "f*cking horsemeat"

I hope Count Zeppelin didn't make the bagpipes or they'll need a f*ck of a load of puff to get going

I know we haven't got many 4 lane motorways up here but this is a guide for driving in England: