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Bus wankers


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Basically the same as the 'c***s on trains' thread but about bus based twattery.

I don't get the bus all that often, but am currently on one right now. A couple of seats in front of me was a guy wearing his work lanyard OUTSIDE HIS JACKET! Bad enough to be the sort of bell end who wears their work lanyard outside of work, but he went to the trouble of putting on his coat then putting his lanyard on. He could just have put it in a pocket then put it on when he got in to work.

What a p***k.

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Used to get Lothian Buses all the time when I worked in central Edinburgh, they offer a very good service.  The new buses are nice and clean with free wi-fi.  There also used to be a nice black and white cat that lived at the bus-stop I got on at every day.

However, bus passengers are often a breed apart.  If you fancy a glance on how complete mentalists live get a Lothian bus during the day, full of complete headcases looking for a captive audience.  When I lived in Leith you'd also get nutcase alcoholics drinking cider on the bus, usually after the driver had refused to let me on with a coffee.

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There’s a complete nutter gets the 21 in Edinburgh fairly regularly (or used to anyway, thankfully I’ve not been on it in a few months), usually gets on at the shops in muirhouse I think. Spends the whole time loudly asking everyone if they’re “going out tonight?” then shrieking why if they say no.

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Ah, the thread for me...

 

Those at the front of a queue who'll put their hands out to flag the bus down, realise that it's the 17 as opposed to the 7 and then wave it by, not thinking that the dozen folk behind them might want that bus.

 

Same applies to those who ding the bell, go to the front and then say "aw, not this stop, next one" at the expense of those expecting it to stop.

 

Also when there are signs that say "ring bell and wait for bus to stop before getting up", only for driver not to stop unless you're standing beside him/her.

 

I'm sure I can think of plenty more...

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2 minutes ago, Hedgecutter said:

Those at the front of a queue who'll put their hands out to flag the bus down, realise that it's the 17 as opposed to the 7 and then wave it by, not thinking that the dozen folk behind them might want that bus.

 

Same applies to those who ding the bell, go to the front and then say "aw, not this stop, next one" at the expense of those expecting it to stop.

 

Also when there are signs that say "ring bell and wait for bus to stop before getting up", only for driver not to stop unless you're standing beside him/her.

 

I'm sure I can think of plenty more...

I'll be disappointed if you don't.

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I'll stick to bus specific gripes to avoid an echo of the other threads:

  • Exact change / "I'll get rid of some coppers" c***s holding the bus up.
  • People who stop the bus to say "is this for [insert place]?" as if bus drivers are travel information points (90% never get on)
  • The c*** that forced technology on all the old c***s with bus passes.
  • Those incapable of handling stairs who decide to sit upstairs, but especially those who don't understand the concept of momentum when walking down them on a decelerating vehicle. Watching them faceplant the wall can be funny though.
  • C***s who ring the bell 10 secs after somebody else has already rung it, highlighted by the words "bus stopping" for all to see.
  • C***s that wait until the very last minute to pick up their dozen shopping bags.
  • The guy at the bus stop that self appointed himself as the bus arrivals announcer. Seen a few around and they always wear those thick grey jobby-catcher trousers. Perhaps it's a uniform for an organised national volunteer group.
  • When there are two bus stops barely 20m apart (for whatever reason) and some able-bodied lazy f***er decides to get the one closest one to them despite everyone waiting being at the other, making the bus needlessly stop twice.
  • Folk that spend an age just standing there saying "you were first, nah you were here before me, I don't mind, on you go".  Will some c*** just get on a f***in' bus!!!
  • Window Wars
  • Folk that stand at stops and don't give incoming drivers any notification of whether they want the thing to stop or not.  The fact that drivers always show me their appreciation whenever I give the 'no thanks' sign highlights that this must be one of their biggest bugbears. 
Edited by Hedgecutter
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c***s who drive the fucking things and can't  get it where it's meant to be at the time it's meant to be there.

About 6 months ago I found myself on the last bus out of kirkcaldy at about midnight (I know).  Anyway there were about 3 other damned souls on this moving fucking nightmare and sure enough some utter jakeball sits across from me then proceeds to tell me he's pished himself and duly staggers up to show me his own personal Niagara falls moment on his jeans.

I decided it was a nice night for a walk and bailed out about 3 stops earlier than planned.

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1 hour ago, oneteaminglasgow said:

There’s a complete nutter gets the 21 in Edinburgh fairly regularly (or used to anyway, thankfully I’ve not been on it in a few months), usually gets on at the shops in muirhouse I think. Spends the whole time loudly asking everyone if they’re “going out tonight?” then shrieking why if they say no.

I wonder if I encountered the same person in Stockbridge getting on a 29. She had a bag with her and pushed past people to get a seat and put her bag down beside her. When folk asked if they could sit there she would shriek "No! At's for ma bag!" and then ask them "Are you going out tonight then?" She also asked a dog if he was going out tonight and got annoyed when it didn't answer.

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First Bus drivers are the biggest c***s of the lot, absolutely no idea how to use the brakes/handbrake, totally unable to stop at the bus stop rather than 10ft past it & generally are just c***s anyway.

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