sjc Posted September 1, 2013 Share Posted September 1, 2013 Magpies. You try to feed them but whenever you even try to chuck something in their direction, they just fly away to some tree to think about it for a minute. Then when they decide it's safe, some feckin seagull's got it. They must eat dead seagull to survive or something. Don't feed magpies mate.....they kill the songbird chicks. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IainMorton Posted September 1, 2013 Share Posted September 1, 2013 They should be made to go in their bra and pants. You obviously haven't seen the females that live where I live. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hoopy1967 Posted September 1, 2013 Share Posted September 1, 2013 You aren't referring to anyone in particular, are you? No....... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tuffers Posted September 2, 2013 Share Posted September 2, 2013 Waiting to be served a pint in the pub after work and the fucking coffee brigade are in! Feck off to a coffee shop if you want a fecking coffee! Then they moan that the jukebox is to loud! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IainMorton Posted September 2, 2013 Share Posted September 2, 2013 People who post their opinions on message boards then put 'FACT' after it to make it look like their opinion is the correct one and everyone else is wrong. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
IainMorton Posted September 2, 2013 Share Posted September 2, 2013 Ive been on hold to Ikea customer services for 36 minutes now and Im bursting for a pish. Do I hang up or pish my breeks? I assume you aren't on your mobile? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Monster Posted September 2, 2013 Share Posted September 2, 2013 elephant car insurance. I make mine walk. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
The Grass Is Greener. Posted September 2, 2013 Share Posted September 2, 2013 People who post their opinions on message boards then put 'FACT' after it to make it look like their opinion is the correct one and everyone else is wrong. Nearly as bad as "just saying" Of course your "just saying" we've just bloody read it. Arseholes. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kev23 Posted September 2, 2013 Share Posted September 2, 2013 People who post their opinions on message boards then put 'FACT' after it to make it look like their opinion is the correct one and everyone else is wrong.Don't tell that to Rafa Benitez. He is always talking about facts. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WeAreElgin Posted September 2, 2013 Share Posted September 2, 2013 You obviously haven't seen the females that live where I live. Aye, considering the standard of the birds that walk around here in their pyjamas I'd really rather that than their scants.. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WullieBroonIsGod Posted September 2, 2013 Share Posted September 2, 2013 Ive been on hold to Ikea customer services for 36 minutes now and Im bursting for a pish. Do I hang up or pish my breeks? Pish breeks. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
broon-loon Posted September 2, 2013 Share Posted September 2, 2013 (edited) So what was the outcome Mozza'... Hang on for a response and 'Trouser Hydration'......Or, hang up and allow the Swedish Empire to take the piss ? Edit for toilet break.. Edited September 2, 2013 by broon-loon 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
capybara Posted September 2, 2013 Share Posted September 2, 2013 Price of a 1st class stamp! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
~~~ Posted September 2, 2013 Share Posted September 2, 2013 Sky Sports boasting about spending records being broken. Over £500m spent so far, thats not something to boast about. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kev23 Posted September 2, 2013 Share Posted September 2, 2013 The lack of really big, exciting or particularly interesting transfers all summer!Despite £500m being spent... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
WullieBroonIsGod Posted September 3, 2013 Share Posted September 3, 2013 People using the term "man-flu" It's a fucking cold, everyone gets them. Man the f**k up 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest The Phoenix Posted September 3, 2013 Share Posted September 3, 2013 Had to hang up on the Swedish House Furniture Mafia yesterday as my light grey trousers meant any minor pish leakage would be highly visible to all and sundry. I emailed the fuckers and the auto reply said they would get back within 11 days. 11 fucking days. You must be the only person left on mother earth that still has a phone that's attached to the receiver. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stellaboz Posted September 3, 2013 Share Posted September 3, 2013 People who are so fat they have to use a dialling wand. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
invergowrie arab Posted September 3, 2013 Share Posted September 3, 2013 I found some lost property,probably expensive but no use to me or I would have stolen it. I found it by loch lomond at 10 pm so when I drove past crianlarich police station it was shut. Nae bother thinks me.single Scottish police force I'll hand it in in Dundee. They wont take it and won't pass it on.told I need to drive with it to garelochhead other technically I'm committing an offence. Phoned police Scotland. After speaking to 4 people trying to get number for garelochhead am eventually told they wont give me.direct number but not to worry as it's such an expensive item.the person will be insured. Moral of story if you find something and can use it steal it,if not leave it. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gaz FFC Posted September 3, 2013 Share Posted September 3, 2013 The rubbish reasons some people were voting no in the referendum next year. They offer an opinion yet do no research. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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