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Petty Things That Get On Your Nerves...


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Oh yeah, forgot about that! On reflection it probably wasn't that interesting but to cut it short my friend Rhiannon's younger brother proposed to a random girl from Paisley on stage at the Hard Rock Cafe to get a free bottle of champagne. I thought it was going to be some crappy Sekt but it turned out to be 100quid Moet. Anyway, she said yes and the night went weird from there.

I also managed to get the number of a rather nice Slovakian waitress who I'm taking out tonight. That, for me anyway, is the biggest news in the world since I'm the world's most useless bugger with the laydeez.

Love is in the air....

So, I'm assuming they aren't actually going to get married and she just agreed to go hawfers on some wine?

But, if your friend's brother looks like a smashed biscuit and the Paisley lassie is good looking ( :lol: *) then he certainly should marry her.

I jest Paisley natives. On my travels the other week I did manage to find a few humans in the area. :)

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Love is in the air....

So, I'm assuming they aren't actually going to get married and she just agreed to go hawfers on some wine?

But, if your friend's brother looks like a smashed biscuit and the Paisley lassie is good looking ( :lol: *) then he certainly should marry her.

I jest Paisley natives. On my travels the other week I did manage to find a few humans in the area. :)

Well when I left them they had gone off somewhere together. No marriage but I do expect they smeared genital juices.

She's a bit of a chubster with 'ruddy' red cheeks and a 'proper' accent. I had to translate.

I thought he was gay, but obviously not. He looks like a cross between Jonathan Ross and Maxxie from Skins.

To be honest I'd do the same for a bottle of Moet...

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Love is in the air....

So, I'm assuming they aren't actually going to get married and she just agreed to go hawfers on some wine?

But, if your friend's brother looks like a smashed biscuit and the Paisley lassie is good looking ( :lol: *) then he certainly should marry her.

I jest Paisley natives. On my travels the other week I did manage to find a few humans in the area. :)

You sure you never strayed into Barrhead.

Edited by broxy
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I played on some crappy municipal course in Sarasota last time I was over, and I had the same thing. They did make up for their complete ignorance by making me chuckle quite a bit- putting quite a few balls onto the freeway by the course and at one stage one of them leaving their entire bag of clubs on the previous hole and searching frantically for them...

I was playing at Highlands Reserve. It's just off US 27 between Clermont and Davenport. The only laugh I really got out of them was that they had a little girl who must have been about 6 with them. Unlike the other three, she actually looked like she could swing a club.

I put two shots clean out of the course with the three wood. Massive slices on both shots. Thankfully I missed the villas, unlike my exploits when I played in Portugal :ph34r:

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I was playing at Highlands Reserve. It's just off US 27 between Clermont and Davenport. The only laugh I really got out of them was that they had a little girl who must have been about 6 with them. Unlike the other three, she actually looked like she could swing a club.

I put two shots clean out of the course with the three wood. Massive slices on both shots. Thankfully I missed the villas, unlike my exploits when I played in Portugal :ph34r:

I just looked at the one I was on. 'Rips Golf Center' - $7 green fees, par 27 :lol:

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Rubbish! A deer that runs out into the road in front of a car has just forfeited its right to life. Likewise, a spider that gets into a bog. A spider on the walls, fine, spider in the garden, fine, spider in the bog, they just lost their right to life.

I take issue with this. Anytime a spider crosses my path, be it in the garden, on the bog, anywhere, they lose their right to live! :angry:

Spiders have no right to life whatsoever.

I agree with this. :D

I don't kill animals anyway. I don't like doing it - I'm far too nice! Plus, if I even tried to go for the spider, it would have me.

I went for a pish last night and couldn't find the bugger.. I was really, really feart.

I like spiders. I just don't like really, really big ones.

Well, I could handle a tarantula or that, because I wanted one when I was a wee boy, but it's when I see house spiders on steroids... That's when I get the fear.

Having met you at the 5's, I wouldn't have had you as 'feart' of anything :lol: , but I also, am scared of spiders. And I don't kill animals either, but spiders don't even deserve to be classed as animals, so when I see one, I aim to obliterate it!

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I really want a shot on the water flume on the Barclaycard advert, but I'd rate the chances of me getting a shot as 'slim to none'. :(

I was thinking the same thing a couple of weeks ago, but I would agree theres very little chance of getting a shot.

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Why can't people use roundabouts properly? Yes, you silly bint, more than one car at a time are allowed on <_<

Are you talking about people on the inside lane going straight ahead cutting off people in the outside lane, because that really does my head in?

It may be ageist and sexist but they're usually old women.

BTW there is a tendancy in Dundee to call roundabouts circles!

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Decided to go for a pint earlier as I was a bit bored and fed up.

Just got to Tollcross Road and some guy was pestering me for a cigarette. I do smoke, but I wasn't smoking at that point. I just told him that I was a non-smoker, hoping that would be the end of it and I could go for a nice pint or two. Oh no, he keeps annoying me.

Can't even go to the pub without some arsehole doing your tits in.

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Friday Night With Jonathon Ross. Ross introduces Paulo Nuitini.

"Paulo grew up above a chip shop in Glasgow"

*Paulo sits there and grins*

Now sorry, that really gets my fucking goat. Not only can the BBC not even tell the difference between Scotland's biggest city and its biggest town, but Nuitini doesn't even want to correct him.

Dirty wannabe weegie c**t :angry:

Edited by Andy.C
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