eindhovendee

You'd need to ask the greatly achieving yet curiously humble Kim Jung Div about that.

He's banned, so is xbr.

LIP

Check out Mrs.You'renogettingyourholetonightcunto on the right.

"woohoo, will we get to pump the Danish burd again"

The signing auditions are taking place now.

Is it not his uncle that is dead?

I think he means chop him/her up into small pieces of firewood.

No Tweet results for kazzza92.

Mike Batt ‏@Mike_Batt17 Nov Just heard what I thought was an advert to cure "a reptile disfunction". Nah. Can't have been. Reply Retweet Favorite More Expand Charlie ‏@eindhovendee17 Nov @Mike_Batt Think that's why dinosaurs died out. Expand Mike Batt ‏@Mike_Batt18 Nov @eindhovendee very good, I think we just co-created a joke. Me and Mike Batt (writer of the fantastically wonderful songs Bright Eyes and Remember You're A Womble) are now "co-creating" "jokes" together, according to him.

mid-table sounds a bit of a fussy for that Sarge.

He certainly has and there's a few veiled threats tweeted back to him. CelticResearch ‏@CelticResearch19m Banter Adam? @adamreid94 I'll pass your details on to the families of the lads in jail. Good luck with your future trolling

What a headline. From the Bedfordshire on Sunday. 'Semi-erect' OAP caught shampooing his genitals on a bus claims he's 'no hardened criminal' Written byRUPERT MARQUAND A PENSIONER was caught shampooing his privates on a bus after becoming irritated with his underpants. Philip Milne, 74, was travelling from Bletchley to Bedford when he began to have some issues with his briefs and unzipped his trousers to 'use some shampoo to soothe his groin area' because he did not have his ointment to hand. He was spotted by a mother and son who 'were chatting and heard there was something going on' and turned around to have a look, Bedford Magistrates' Court heard today (September 3). Prosecuting Camille Gifford said: "In essence the defendant was masturbating while on the bus. “He had his zip undone on his trousers and was rubbing his penis and his testicles." Milne, of Water Eaton Road, Bletchley, had earlier been to the swimming pool when he was found applying the hair-care product on August 13. Ms Gifford added: "He said he had some issues with some briefs he was wearing and he was using ointment to soothe the area. "He says he became irritated but didn't have the ointment and instead used some shampoo to soothe his groin. "The mother notified the bus driver who then notified the police and Milne was told to stay on the back of the bus. "He said he wasn't masturbating and resented everyone else on the bus for ganging up on him." Milne, who admitted guilt to the one charge of an act of outraging public decency, represented himself in court. He said: "I'm not disputing what was done was wrong but bear in mind I thought I was being discreet." Milne, who was described as 'semi-erect' during the act, added: "I was treated like a hardened criminal." Magistrates fined him £75. He will also have to pay £85 court costs and a £20 victim surcharge adding up to a total of £180. UPDATE: ‘Embarrassed’ pensioner caught shampooing genitals on bus says ‘I have learned my lesson’ Read more: http://www.bedfordshire-news.co.uk/News/Man-74-shampoos-genitals-on-Bedford-bus-after-having-issues-with-his-briefs-20130903121453.htm#ixzz2kHWmfoMG

Maybe it's just his head that's a couple of stones overweight.

Every team I back!

He's obviously a lazy b*****d.

I love this story from the Dundee Evening Tele. Angus man diagnosed with chronic lateness condition Jim Dunbar has been late for everything. Late for work, late for football matches, late for holidays. He’s left women stood waiting on a first date, turned up to meals with friends hours after he should have and even arrived for funerals long after they’ve begun. But the 57-year-old says that it isn’t his fault after his poor timekeeping was diagnosed as a medical condition — at a Ninewells hospital appointment he was half-an-hour late for. Despite his chronic lateness diagnosis, Jim, who has spent most of his life living in Fintry, still struggles to arrive on time as he tackles the incurable condition. Recently Jim, who now lives in Forfar, tried to go to the cinema. Knowing that it could be a problem getting to Dundee’s DCA for a 7pm show, he gave himself an 11-hour head-start. He arrived 20 minutes late. Dundee United fan Jim said: “I got up at 8.15am to go to a David Bowie film at the DCA that started at seven o’clock. “That gave me 11 hours to get ready. I knew I was going there — and I was 20 minutes late. “I get down about it and it’s disturbing for other folk when you arrive late.” In his livingroom, the former Dundee City Council worker has a special clock that uses radio frequencies tuned to a national transmitter to make sure that the time it displays is always exactly right, down to the second. It doesn’t help. He has tried wearing a watch, setting his clocks fast and trying to arrive at places early, but still hasn’t found a solution. He has had the problem all his life — he can remember being late for school at Longhaugh Primary as a five-year-old — and, until his diagnosis last year, blamed himself. His family still don’t believe him. He said: “My family don’t believe it and think I’m making excuses. “I’ve been late for funerals and slipped in and hid at the back of the hall. “I arranged to pick my friend up at midday to go on holiday and was four hours late. He was furious because we had booked a ferry and everything. “A friend invited me over for a meal and I was more than three hours late. He only lives in Whitfield. “It has affected my entire life.” Jim’s condition affects the same part of the brain as Attention-Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) and means that he cannot properly gauge how long things take. He says that consistently being late has caused him to lose dozens of jobs over the years. Jim said: “The reason I want it out in the open is that there has got to be other folk out there with it and they don’t realise that it’s not their fault. “I blamed it on myself and thought: ‘Why can’t I be on time?’. I lost a lot of jobs. “I can understand people’s reaction and why they don’t believe me. “It is really depressing sometimes. I can’t overstate how much it helped to say it was a condition.” http://www.eveningtelegraph.co.uk/news/local/angus-man-diagnosed-with-chronic-lateness-condition-1.124428

It must be fucking difficult to set fire to a basin. Top arsonist.

DAB mouse?

That just never gets less funny. His keyboard is fantastic, adds a serious tone to the song I find.

Reginald D Hunter. Top troll. https://www.facebook.com/ReginaldDHunter?hc_location=stream

Sleeping dogs do.

Manchester United v Real Sociedad U19s. Tomorrow at 14.00 in the Salford City Stadium. 3 quid to get in

Pretty sure the dogs didn't do it even if they didn't answer any questions and behaved strangely.

Yes, she was missing for a day and a half. Hope she had a morning after pill for breakfast.