Cosmic Joe

Mon the Rise

I actually think Jack is a better player this season. Not as many goals, but a wheen of assists. His head is screwed on. He is a terrific team player these days..

Hmmm. I'm not sure that Stranraer were ever going to be title contenders this season. Aggie's a good lad and a decent coach/ manager and I really hope he will keep you lads up. I think he will.

I have. On numerous occasions since 1984. Most of their fans are decent ordinary supporters.

The number of butchers' aprons around the pitch is embarrassing. Why don't the Airdrie fans chase these fannies?

Just your average Saturday afternoon then

That's pathetic

Good

It was the succession of yellow cards that was utterly baffling.

I can be a bit of a fool at times. This much is true

Why is the dirty get Liam Scullion still playing? Shouldn't he be serving a suspension for gobbing on opposition fans?

Clyde fans are not on the same planet.

Aye...

An easy one

The polis could never behave themselves

Same stuff applies. Mostly the present stuff. Ignore the sponsors stuff. Enjoy the day!

That would also suffice to be honest. I'm not sure there is an unsafe way though.

I think the First Communion would be the time for a token gift. Even a card would suffice

Sorry, forgot to add, the individuals will come forward with their sponsors. The congregation will be asked to declare their faith. It will be a simple "I do" response to the Priest. Again optional. You won't get stared at if you don't respond. Nobody will notice. Most in attendance will be mumbling, you will be in the company of non- adherents.

Mass is not that different from a COS gig. You stand up to pray, kneeling is optional when it comes to pre-Communion. There is no obligation when it comes to Communion but you can place your arms in a kind of St Andrew's cross across your chest if you wish to receive a blessing from the Priest. The Our Father stops slightly shorter, you wish the guys' around you peace when prompted just after the Our Father. Hopefully (pretty sure) you will be made welcome. Most of the Catholic family in attendance will probably be equally at sea. Catholic non attendance at Mass is almost as rife as their Presbyterian neebors.

Do you think Sunak realises that a significant percentage of the cretins that voted for Johnson won't vote for him because of one reason?

Stephen Jardine on Radio Scotland gradually losing the ability to pronounce the letter "r".

What happens to the goat?

Palestine have grabbed a fifth

Israel drawing 0-0 at home to Iceland. I strongly suspect that Israel really are playing at home.