Sergeant Wilson

I like muslims. They sell drink and kebabs and some of them are doctors. I use the first two regularly and will get to the third lot eventually. The Chinese are good c***s as well.

Is it the one below The Conference?

When will the Egyptians cotton on?

Sellotaping coke to swallows was a better idea.

I don't think the one wearing the Mickey Mouse ears is doing herself any favours.

...at the side of the road.

Tell you Mrs to make her own way to work.

You couldn't nip in to Peru, a wee message for me, could you?

What do you say happened then? "May I consult my notbook? Don't know , like that when we got here sir."

He let's prisoners choose which stairs they fall down.

Officer Bumhole to you sonny.Eta...you didn't mean kilbowie, did you?

Don't deserve to live? For fucksake!

Apparently, she'd taken a Lenzie some money from gangsters and was forced. In to it.

You've obviously never been to the juniors. A boy at Shotts brings a go-kart that shoud need road tax. It's huge.

There's always at least one if I'm involved.

I'm in Bristol.

How did you know I was coming?

Just because you've got Peter Falks auld coat, it doesn't make you Columbo.

^^^Richard Madeley.

I thought I'd become psychic when it happened at first.

Fingers Crossed, he told you.

Are we still talking about your bedside manner?

It's better than ten fucking million. I wish Airdrie had Jackson rather than Nimmo. It certainly highlights the importance of the major creditor. Barr could have did what Masterton did. I hope the old c**t gets a moment of lucidity tonight as his nappy gets changed.

He knows his bunions.

Lichtie has never lost a patient.