'WellDel

The shitey fumes from Billy Bowie's tankers must have addled his brain if he's willing to spunk that level of cash.

Aye, hopefully if he ends up at either of his supposed destinations he (literally) rolls up like the second coming of Ross McCormack.

Would love that to be true, if it was then I'd definitely agree he'd been sniffing.

He's a big p***k anyway..

Suppose it's no less flattering than Cornton.

Getting to that point in time where the people on both sides of potential deals start to get twitchy and it becomes a matter of seeing who blinks first. Players who are playing teams off against each other maybe start to get nervous that all the sides involved get to a point that their patience/nerve runs out and go after other targets with time running out, leaving said player out in the cold on all fronts. And likewise, managers and chairmen making the decision on whether or not to chuck an extra few hundred quid a week at a deal to steal a march and get their man over the line. C'mon tae feck Motherwell, give us someone to (a) anoint as our new saviour / (b) proclaim as utterly shite with our relegation fate now sealed* *Delete as applicable, but probably mostly (b).

So you're potentially him a fat w****r then, sarge?

Another handsome pay-off incoming for him after only a couple of months in post. Got to hand it to the guy, he's making an absolute fortune out of being utterly shite at his job. Thing is, he'll just trot off somewhere nice and sun himself, stress free for a couple of months then some other mugs will take a punt on him, he'll f**k it again and absolutely rinse them like all the ones before. An absolute master of his art. Or p***k. Whichever you prefer..

Been on a couple of cruises, one of them being a Royal Caribbean ship, Voyager (I think). This was around 15 years ago and the thing was feckin massive, dwarfing most of the other ships in the ports. Even that would probably look like a tug boat alongside this Icon thing today. As others have said, the food and service onboard is top notch, but it's the entitled cnuts you have to share space with that can spoil it a bit, especially the XXXXL Yanks who just seem to eat 24/7. I know that when it's all inclusive folk like to get their money's worth but fck me, I've never seen such gluttony. The main attraction for me was waking up in a different port every morning with somewhere new to explore, and often being places that a day is ample to take in a few of the place's main sights (e.g. Rome, Capri, Monaco/Monte Carlo). Although I could have spent a fortnight in the latter of those just 'admiring' the stunning ladies aboard all the super yachts in the harbour, stupendous viewing.

Greenock branch had a face-lift?

Time to stand up to those big boys on your Community Service crew who've been giving you a hard time?

I know. Round, ffs. Idiots.

Fucking hell, I mean, Fucking. Hell.!! We've had some shite luck with injuries in the past, but this season is something else. Absolutely terrible for both us and the boy if true, as I think he would have been a really good addition to the squad. Hopefully Celtic will see their own facilities and resources as being his best option for rehab, allowing the loan to be cancelled and the saving on his wages made available to bring someone else in. It really is looking more and more like the footballing gods have decided that this is our year to fvck off to the seaside's. A big job ahead to deny them their wishes.

Well theres Lee Erwin who departed for Leeds and is now tearing it up in, eh, Lebanon. His agent obviously does some job getting him gigs in leagues few others have tried, with Finland and Azerbaijan under his belt too. Fair play to the lad for being willing to give these places a go. I'm assuming some of them are the pub-iest of pub leagues

Would agree with the opinions on Duolingo etc. Although I do tend to holiday in recognised tourist areas, I like to take a wander off the central streets and find a nice wee bar or restaurant that the locals use, and in doing so you often and understandably find the people speak little or no English, in which case it's obviously beneficial and courteous if you can communicate with them in their own tongue. For this purpose I've used Duolingo to learn the basics of asking directions and reading/ordering from a menu etc. in Spanish. The app is sufficient for that, and although very obviously a tourist and unable to engage in any lengthy conversation, no matter where you are the locals will tend to appreciate you making at least some effort. If you want to be fully fluent and conversant, an app isn't going to achieve that and finding a course to attend would be the route to go down. Hoping to get round to that one day.

Diddy teams have options Real teams just need Thelonius.

Just shows how the league's stagnated, eh? I doubt any Hearts fan can say that any of their sides in the last few seasons have been close to their best. The entire league is horseshit quality-wise, Hearts are just at the top of a very shite pile. Even the Glasgow pair are stinking out European competition even more than they usually do. I don't know what the answer is, but our whole game needs a boot up the hoop.

Oh you should just have said, we can all agree on that and hope that it is forever the case. DAB bassas.

I'm not entirely sure there are though. A very average Hearts side are running away with 3rd and Kille and St Mirren seem relatively steady, below that though? Although you guys have undoubtedly shown a bit of class at times and Hibs have been blowing hot and cold, there really hasn't been much quality on show at all and it's all to play for in the diddy stakes.

I honestly think that's where you will be and Docherty has done a fine job so far, bur as long as the points difference stays as tight as it is between the everyone in the bottom 6, there will be a helluva lot of arses twitching like a rabbits nose up and down the country. At least that's what I'm telling myself to try and relieve the pressure on my own sphincter!!.

I know they started well and have looked really good at times, and they also have games in hand, but a bit of doubt must be creeping into the minds of Dee's fans that they could soon be back down swirling round the plughole with a few of us others. Aberdeen have all the quality required in their ranks to climb clear, but the longer they persevere with bungling Barry in charge, the longer it will be before their supporters can really breathe easily. I still think Livi are goners, and I think ourselves ('Well), St J and County are by far the obvious candidates fighting to avoid it, but the play off place could easily be a 4 or 5 way fight for a good while yet.

As long as he turns out pony for them...

Money talks But it don't sing and dance and it don't walk.

Mon then ya p***k!!

Oh aye, a cup game under the lights is magic, especially in an old school stadium and think it has the potential to be a cracking tie. Just think as it's only an hr down the road the Saturday would have seen us take really good numbers, and f*cked off that I won't get there now!!.