Raith Against The Machine

Celtic's "bumblebee" kit. I've seen a lot of bumblebees in my time, and none of them have been fucking luminous green.

Or "Properly dispose of that body"?

Just about every time the Rovers win a game, the opposition start calling for their manager to get the sack! Aberdeen, Dundee, Airdrie (alright, they're doing it most weeks anyway, but it got worse after we put them out of the cup), Dunfermline... Are we really that bad?

Unwritten Man Law: If you see someone pushing a car, you must offer to help.

Brian Blessed \o/

Gaaaaaaaah early

I hear someone threw Chuck Norris a surprise party, and he threw them into the sun.

Spotify is advertising a "New Jimi Hendrix album" Pretty sure he's deid.

Actually ended up just walking from the Indian we were at (I keep forgetting the name, and want to call it Boromir's). It was a 15 minute walk, but it meant we were well out of the traffic. Happy days

What's Pieface called these days? I imagine it's pretty insensitive to call someone "Pieface" and you definitely can't get away with just eating pies. Anyway, Dennis the Menace is from Dundee, so his mate would actually be called Pehpus.

Brilliant, cheers. That was what I'd thought having a look at the website, but I wasn't 100% sure. Have a green spot, you really should've had one for the Indian suggestion too! Probably just park somewhere else, miles away, to be honest. Think it cost us a fiver to get out of the car park last time. That can't be that wise an idea. What I've spent all my money on Free Bird t-shirts?

Going to see Skynyrd tonight at the SECC "Clyde Auditorium", but I've just been informed that the "X-Factor Tour" is also on at the SECC... What sort of implications is this going to have? I don't really know anything about the set-up, but is that a different building with a shared car-park, or the same building so that the foyer bit will be mobbed with arseholes, or what? Thanks in advance.

Someone has written some complete w****r nonsense on the stairwell in my building, it's something along the lines of: "We can tear down these walls. These foundations are braking." Now, for a start, that's fucking nonsense, and I've seen the people in my building, the closest they'll ever get to tearing down Walls is if they get a job pulling ice cream adverts off bus stops. Secondly, if you're going to write bollocks on my wall, at least fucking spell it correctly.

Wages, mostly. I imagine that the design firms who get handed these projects are paying their designers a fair whack, and they'll be sticking a profit mark-up onto those, too.

I'd be raging if I was Dick Van Dyke's hospital administrator. He's worse than House, FFS! He's never actually in the hospital because he's too busy gallivanting about the place being shot at by drug dealers, and when he does eventually turn up for work, his patients almost always die. You'd think, after nigh-on 200 folk close to him have been murdered over an 8 year period, someone would launch some sort of investigation into his behaviour. But wait! His very own son is a high-ranking policeman with significant influence. If that doesn't scream "cover-up!" then I don't know what does. Then again, it did take 218 auld biddies before they cottoned on to Shippy. He's probably old Mark Sloan's hero.

Come round to mine, I'll do it for a fiver... I can't actually recommend anywhere, but there's a barbers at Causewayhead, and another across the road from Union Street, although I'm not actually sure it's open. I also think the one on the big roundabout at Tesco does men's haircuts, although it's a bit "salon-y" and might be pricey. This is largely unhelpful.

Free hugs? Free punch in the mouth.

Why are kebabs so awesome?

It doesn't bother me that much...

People who underline passages in library books. It's not your fucking book! Why are you drawing on it? For a start, that's just fucking rude, and it's a 24 hour loan book, it's not like you're going to be referring back to it when you're revising in 3 months! And you've just drawn a line under every word in this whole fucking paragraph! And it's the introduction, it doesn't even tell you anything! I can't read stuff properly when it's got scrawly pencil lines under it. Buy your own fucking copy of the book, and a highlighter, you fucking spesh.

Maltesers in a box taste better than Maltesers from a bag. This is a fact.

£85! Jesus, I think I'm going to start nicking balls from away grounds and then take them back to Stark's and sell them to John McGlynn for £20 a go. And cheers for the restaurant suggestions, lads, I think I'll go with Balbir's.

I believe I've read on this very website, that the clubs are given a few balls at the start of the season for nothing, and have the option to buy more if they want to.

On Tuesday night, I'm going to see Lynyrd Skynyrd at the SECC, and I'm looking for the nearest/best Indian Restaurant, in the area. I'll have the car, so it doesn't have to be within walking distance, but decent enough parking would be good. Any ideas?

I need a shower.